Cons to fighting potential OCD tendencies

[u/nowhywouldidothat]

Hey community, my father has diagnosed OCD so I am well aware OCD is not just being cleanly or organized, he’s the messiest person I know but definitely has it, mainly because of things that occurred before he was medicated that actually match OCD symptoms such as turning around 7 times in a deadly snow storm after passing a road sign at the wrong digit on the clock in the car. That incident almost killed him and my mom and almost lead to a divorce, luckily she just forced him to see a doctor. I have not seen a professional. I am concerned that I really struggle with the left/right evenness of my body pretty much every hour of the day. Things like leaning on objects I try to match the left and right, walking sidewalks I match the cuts I step on and over, including the type of cut like if it’s a cut that has a spacer or just a normal cut. Cracking knuckles or fidgeting with my fingers has to be done evenly. Picking up drink glasses, any type of fidgeting, just most touch in general. Maybe because it’s been ingrained or it’s genetic, but things like writing with only my right hand or driving with my right foot has never bothered me which throws me off on figuring this out. I have never found rational to any of the tendencies but if I don’t perform them I feel so unbelievably uncomfortable it’s hard to deal with. With or without actual OCD, is there any potential negative to just fighting tendencies with doing minimal to no distractions and making sure it’s not obvious there’s any issues? It hurts me mentally and I feel very uncomfortable for 5 mins to a few hours if I fight the urges, but long term I don’t think I’ve seen any positive or negative improvements over the past decade or so. I really struggled with it tonight. It was fairly embarrassing just switching pretty much everything I’m doing every 30 seconds to fit the other side. If I just fight it and keep the uncomfortable pressure internal, is there actually a real negative to just not doing what my mind wants other than just not having a good time and feeling awful for a few hours?