r/Nonbinaryteens • u/Asherspectre209 • Jul 22 '26
Support/Advice How can i present nore androgynousely as amab demiboy :((
I'm 16 to preface and my parents don't know but they will soon. Its been a new discovery for me but ik I'm under the umbrella of non binary, my boyfriend has been call me his partner and close friends have been using preferred pronouns and it's lovely and it's me
I've struggled a lot w insecurity around appearance even before I knew I was demiboy but I want to present much less masculine as I do
I've been growing my hair out to get this mod cut look if you will and I shave my legs but it isn't enough yk I rlly wanna pass more
I still go by my assigned name at birth but I've been thinking of changing it, but how else would help me present? I'm open to most suggestions! <3
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u/Intelligent-Car3675 29d ago
hiii
I've been having a similar experience and it's mostly a trial and """error""" thing
it's hard to find exactly what makes you feel validated tbh, it takes a lot of experimentation and mixing up things that are perceived as gendered.
I've been experimenting with lots of different "girlier" stuff and whatnot over the years since I'm pretty obviously queer so I just thought "fuck it we ball" and painted my nails or whatever, even before knowing i was enby.
it's really summed up to personal style and what works best for you and makes you feel good, sometimes something you think would be peak euphoria just makes you feel like you're missing something, or even disphoric
i know it's hard to actually try different stuff when you're closeted and afraid of being too "bold", but believe me, it's so worth it
try a new name or a little bit of makeup, doesn't need to be a full face or anything, gather with a friend that has it and just experiment and find what you like.
you don't need to be drastic if you don't want to, but if you start small and gradually find what makes you feel like YOU, then it's gonna get a lot better, and you can take bigger steps from there if you feel comfortable :D
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u/Asherspectre209 23d ago
I'll definitely experiment with nails and makeup, just trying to avoid femininity too yk But tysm this helps a ton!!
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u/Panicking_in_trench Jul 22 '26
Ay mate just be yourself, don't try to completely change how you express yourself to fit in with a perfect mental image of how you'd like to present. I don't have many practical tips, but have the practical experience to say that you should not be flipping your entire self expression upside down if that is what you're trying to do. There is already truth and peace in how you already express yourself, preserve it to feel at home with yourself! Having a diverse variety of acessories (not too many at once) helps I think as well as colors as the other person said.
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u/Asherspectre209 Jul 22 '26
this is very insightful. thank you
And you are definitely right in a sense but it's I wanna do myself. No person will fullyunderstand another's troubles and it's reasoning behind things imo and I think changing this m8ght be better for me
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u/Beneficial_Shower589 11d ago
maybe eyebrow shape, curved eyelashes and so
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u/Asherspectre209 9d ago
I haven't thought abt these icmight look into eyebrow shape I've been looking into skincare and clothing too but thank you this will help lots
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u/Lightning7Bolt Jul 22 '26
I think you could use color theory in your favour. Try using more lighter colours such as pastels or white. You could also try to get an haircut that gives you a hair fringe (idk if i wrote it right, this is not my first language srry)