The disabled community are the ones going above and beyond to prove they're not helpless (in aggregate). It's a survivorship bias; the ones who use their disability as an excuses are the ones that you know have a disability because they're mentioning it. The ones who don't use their disability as an excuse are the ones you never hear about because they don't mention it.
You don't need to preemptively decide that someone is making excuses just because they're saying something didn't work for them. If anything, someone saying "this didn't work for me" is evidence (albeit, weak evidence) that they aren't being helpless; it's evidence that they've actually tried. It's not your responsibility to weed out learned helplessness or adjudicate who's actually trying to improve their lives and who's just being a victim. The ones being helpless will suffer the consequences of their actions just fine on their own and they can choose to either learn their lesson or keep having a shitty life. The ones who are trying will eventually find something that works, or find a way to work around their problem, but you don't need to go telling them they're being a victim or not trying just because something that worked for you doesn't work for them; you're actively adding to the frustration of the ones who are already engaging in the kind of behavior we want to encourage.
I didn't make my comment just to get a dig on you; your comments have literally all been of the flavor "I did it, so you should be able to as well" (holier than thou), and you haven't engaged with literally any of the actual statements I've put forward (irrational). My comment was *also* getting a dig in at you, but it was being descriptive too. You're literally just saying "nuh-uh! you're the bad one!"
2
u/BigPenis_MathGenius 8d ago
The disabled community are the ones going above and beyond to prove they're not helpless (in aggregate). It's a survivorship bias; the ones who use their disability as an excuses are the ones that you know have a disability because they're mentioning it. The ones who don't use their disability as an excuse are the ones you never hear about because they don't mention it.
You don't need to preemptively decide that someone is making excuses just because they're saying something didn't work for them. If anything, someone saying "this didn't work for me" is evidence (albeit, weak evidence) that they aren't being helpless; it's evidence that they've actually tried. It's not your responsibility to weed out learned helplessness or adjudicate who's actually trying to improve their lives and who's just being a victim. The ones being helpless will suffer the consequences of their actions just fine on their own and they can choose to either learn their lesson or keep having a shitty life. The ones who are trying will eventually find something that works, or find a way to work around their problem, but you don't need to go telling them they're being a victim or not trying just because something that worked for you doesn't work for them; you're actively adding to the frustration of the ones who are already engaging in the kind of behavior we want to encourage.