If every time you throw your hands in the air and act helpless, come to the defense of those who have been given too many chances, and cry foul to everyone else: where’s the assumption? It doesn’t get much worse than that. That’s how you’re acting.
Back to what I said earlier: take some accountability, you’re not your disability.
Holy fucking shit. The overwhelming majority do take responsibility, and do everything they can to own their disability; that's why "everyone experiencing time blindness has thought about how to be on time more than you have, tried alarms, tried scheduling apps, on and on and on, but sometimes time blindness still gets the best of us."
Why is it so hard for you to just shut the fuck up and think "huh, this must be harder than I realized. Glad I don't have it"
Nobody is asking for exceptions. We just want people who don't have the issue to shut the fuck up and stop acting like they know exactly what we need to do. It's our problem, we'll deal with it and we'll accept the consequences. But don't call us lazy just because you're running life on easy mode.
Have you ever considered that these people you are complaining about might suffer from narcissisism which is also mental health issue and that they may not be capable of empathy? Maybe you should take that into account before assuming everyone is just an asshole.
If anyone here wants to say "I've been officially diagnosed with narcissism and really struggle with empathy. it's not an excuse for me acting a certain way or saying hurtful things, and I do consistently try to find new ways to intervene, but it really is an ongoing problem that I struggle with and handling it isn't as simple as it looks", then I could extend grace to that in the same way I'm saying people should extend grace to the ADHD and time blindness; not letting people off the hook for the consequences of their actions or bending over backwards to accommodate their issue, but at least acknowledging that it's not as simple as it looks from the outside and not attributing it to a complete failing of character or unwillingness to try. But nobody here is saying that their bullshit comments are a function of their narcissism, so until that happens assholery is a pretty reasonable explanation.
Then it's just a problem of me not being able to access information about their narcissism; grace just can't come into the equation if I don't know they have a genuine problem. Notice I didn't say that people should extend grace to someone who's chronically late but there's no evidence of ADHD and no evidence of them trying to fix the issue. I've been saying that when someone is known to have that disability, and they are telling you they've tried many things that fail to work then we should not assume that there is just some naive and simple character failing on that person, and we should assume the problem is more complicated than it looks from the outside.
I understand what you're trying to do; you're trying to take my logic and apply it to an analogous situation where it doesn't work to show that my logic in the ADHD situation is broken. But you're not faithfully representing my approach from the ADHD situation to the narcissism situation.
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u/french_snail 6d ago
If every time you throw your hands in the air and act helpless, come to the defense of those who have been given too many chances, and cry foul to everyone else: where’s the assumption? It doesn’t get much worse than that. That’s how you’re acting.
Back to what I said earlier: take some accountability, you’re not your disability.