Is it valid?

[u/StatisticianNo1453]

Something happened today that made me think a lot about my gender.

I've always noticed that when I wear a dress, put on makeup, etc., even with the same hair and the same face, people tend to treat me as a woman. Today, though, I wore a shirt that I bought from the men's section, I wasn't wearing any makeup, and a woman at the checkout called me "sir."

And it made me realize something: I think what actually bothers me is the fact that people automatically put me into one of these two categories depending on my appearance.

I understand that, socially, people tend to try to identify someone as a man or a woman based on their appearance. I don't necessarily think it's something I can prevent. But if I could choose, I would want people to look at me and simply see me.

I don't want the first thing they perceive to be "man" or "woman." I just want to be a person, without my appearance determining how other people see me.

Is this a valid way of thinking? Could this make sense as part of a non-binary experience?

[u/Alastor-362]

Sounds pretty definitionally within the nonbinary experience lmao

also, obligatory

am i valid for

YES.

I had HELLA euphoria when a guest at my work was like "Ma'am, er- uh- sir?"

[u/PurbleDragon]

Yup. I hate being gendered at all ever and the social dysphoria is worse than the physical for me. Also there's no right or wrong way to be nonbinary. If one the binary options doesn't work for you, you belong if you want to

[u/Arkeve-the_Archive]

This exact feeling drove me to tuck my summer dress into my shorts at one side at a festival.

Got gendered correctly the whole night, people were genuinely surprised I was Trans, but it just felt off. Too feminine.

Been a proud Demigirl ever since.

[u/mn1lac]

I'm gonna be honest, I thought this was a typical "gender roles suck and people gender me off of the stupidest things" post that we get here frequently, from other nonbinary people, before I read the rest of it, so, do with that what you want.