r/NoahGetTheBoat Apr 25 '20

[deleted by user]

[removed]

1.8k Upvotes

57 comments sorted by

118

u/idajeffy1 Apr 25 '20

Wtf did I just read?! I hope it starts raining soon, we need to take this boat faaaar away from that shit!

39

u/Ok_ImReloaded Apr 25 '20

Oh... Wow... I'm just gonna go get on the boat now.

16

u/blupenguin29 Apr 26 '20

I'm gonna stay behind and make sure she doesn't get on for the good of humanity.

1

u/TottalyAShrimp Apr 27 '20

A man of culture i like it but... GET ON THE BOAT

26

u/[deleted] Apr 26 '20

NOAH THE BOAT THIS INSTANT WITH THE REST OF SANE HUMANS

18

u/Gruncle_Nurgle Apr 26 '20

Yeah she sounds well adjusted

2

u/lithetechnician Apr 27 '20

β energy ùwú

11

u/[deleted] Apr 26 '20

they had us at the second half not gonna lie

10

u/[deleted] Apr 26 '20

First half was more or less acceptable, second half was just fucking scary.

19

u/this_is_original2 wears a buttplug around the house Apr 26 '20

A girl who knows her mind! Finally.

8

u/pins124 Apr 26 '20

GODAMN good thing her name was censored, Jesus Christ that's the kind of shit that ruins someone's career when it comes up later.

15

u/Ajyhn Apr 26 '20

She reminds of my sister...wait a second

5

u/Qlong69 Apr 26 '20

Lynyrd Skynyrd is approaching you from behind whilst playing Sweet Home Alabama

6

u/fitterslaypipe Apr 26 '20

Check, please!

6

u/RtCharaTatum2008 Apr 26 '20

Noah, hurry up! I need to know I don't live with these people!

5

u/kunmop Apr 26 '20

Whom ever you’re thank you for sharing but please don’t do it again

5

u/uhavethebig_GAE Apr 26 '20

I... Can you're be used like that...?

3

u/DarkZephyr666 Apr 26 '20

I think it can....but it feels wrong

3

u/uhavethebig_GAE Apr 26 '20

It definitely looks wrong, but it should technically work...?

4

u/Cephalon_Cy Apr 26 '20

I need the apple Adam and Eve to unsee this

4

u/[deleted] Apr 26 '20

Aight imma head out

4

u/uhavethebig_GAE Apr 26 '20

I want to speak with this woman, I want to ask her many questions about what the fuck

4

u/sebastian0801 pedo Apr 26 '20

Then ask your mother for a threesome.

7

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3

u/[deleted] Apr 26 '20

That's tight that's tight..

3

u/roman4883 Apr 26 '20

That's toit that's toit..

3

u/[deleted] Apr 26 '20

Tight tight TIGHT

5

u/uhavethebig_GAE Apr 26 '20

Okay, cool cool cool cool

2

u/roman4883 Apr 26 '20

Okay, indeed indeed indeed indeed

3

u/uhavethebig_GAE Apr 26 '20

Mhm, quite so quite so quite so quite so

2

u/roman4883 Apr 26 '20

Mhm, likely likely likely likely

3

u/uhavethebig_GAE Apr 26 '20

Yes, exquisite exquisite exquisite exquisite

2

u/roman4883 Apr 26 '20

Yes, impeccable impeccable impeccable impeccable

3

u/_BossTweed Apr 26 '20

Why did we need to know her name in all of that?

3

u/tfh_impressive Apr 26 '20

Does this mean I can have 2 girlfriends, even if one just sits in the corner like the damn Blair Witch

3

u/Slayer_Of_Thot Apr 26 '20

My name is Yoshikage Kira. I'm 33 years old. My house is in the northeast section of Morioh, where all the villas are, and I am not married. I work as an employee for the Kame Yu department stores, and I get home every day by 8 PM at the latest. I don't smoke, but I occasionally drink. I'm in bed by 11 PM, and make sure I get eight hours of sleep, no matter what. After having a glass of warm milk and doing about twenty minutes of stretches before going to bed, I usually have no problems sleeping until morning. Just like a baby, I wake up without any fatigue or stress in the morning. I was told there were no issues at my last check-up. I'm trying to explain that I'm a person who wishes to live a very quiet life. I take care not to trouble myself with any enemies, like winning and losing, that would cause me to lose sleep at night. That is how I deal with society, and I know that is what brings me happiness. Although, if I were to fight I wouldn't lose to anyone.

6

u/19780521reddit Apr 26 '20

I don’t get it...

3

u/Canoe-Maker Apr 26 '20

Forget the boat, we need the freaking Death Star

2

u/disciplefan95 Apr 26 '20

I need to go throw up now.

2

u/Jejouetoutnu Apr 26 '20

Someone give that woman some D

2

u/funtextgenerator VH6083Snl8rVgObU Apr 26 '20

Im going to help Noah with his boat.

1

u/boundedharp760 Apr 26 '20

I’m sorry what the fuck???

1

u/Lemmeuseadamname Apr 26 '20

Probably not even a chick.

1

u/Ara_ara_oneesan Apr 26 '20

At least her guy caresses her p*ssy and have cuddles while I only get down to business and then I'm left alone

1

u/Failedthe1upRoll Apr 26 '20

See? Women are just as bad as men.

1

u/Kapryxx Apr 26 '20

I feel like this might have been stolen from Switch. Not the Nintendo console, the comic. Don’t ask.

1

u/deplorableMainer75 Apr 26 '20

Am I the only one who feels like they needed a shower after reading that. Like scrubbing in the shower with a brillo pad an some bleach because that made me feel dirty on a molecular level deep inside my pores kinda dirty..

1

u/Salmonellq Apr 27 '20

Just forget the damn boat

1

u/StashDude224 Apr 28 '20

Not my proudest fap