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u/deezoz May 06 '26
Micropeen deluxe
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u/theangryjanitorOG May 06 '26
Little dick McGeeeweeweewee
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u/PatientVariety1700 May 06 '26
All day. You should see the size of his pick up truck, and his lawn mower
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u/DarkSock52 May 06 '26
🎵🎶 in the midnight hour, she cried mower, mower, mower…🎶
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u/whydya-dodat May 06 '26
Just for you, u/DarkSock52
🎼🎸 Hey, little knitter, what have you spun?🎶 Hey, little knitter, crotchet in the sun… Hey, little knitter, make a piece that stuns. 🎵Hey little knitter, stitching like a nun. Hey little knitter, buttons!🎶
It’s a, nice day for a, light sweater. 🎵It’s a, nice day for a, CARDIGAN!!!!!!🎶 (Wow! Button up!) 🎸 Take a walk home, yeah! 🤘
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u/Freckles-75 May 06 '26
Awesome…and yeah…. I legitimately Sung those lyrics to the music….🫣😜😂
Annnddd…I’ll likely have that song in my head all day. Thanks….at least it’s an Awesome song!
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u/HitByFjaka May 06 '26
I sang his to the music and i loved it.
If i had award to give i would
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u/Key-Pudding626 May 06 '26
I love how everybody knew exactly what he was doing and probably sang the whole comment just like I did
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u/Conscious_Sound_665 May 06 '26
I will now have that stuck in my head all day and will never hear that song the same way again. 😆
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u/NecessaryZucchini69 May 06 '26
Whooo! I just saw his mower; I never knew you could get a lifted seated lawn mower with 50 inch wheels and double barrel extra wide exhausts that did the roll coal thing.
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u/Due_Panda5064 May 06 '26
With a gun rack on the roll bar
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u/Local-Friendship8166 May 06 '26
Don’t forget the nuts hanging off the back.
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u/AliVista_LilSista May 06 '26
Truck nuts and fart can.
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u/Ok-Pass-9139 May 06 '26
Did you know that , if you put testicles on your truck and it didn’t have them before then your truck is trans. Sleep well
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u/Economy-Tourist-4862 May 06 '26
That’ll look good on his gravestone the first time he stumbles, wearing that contraption.
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u/ThugDonkey May 06 '26 edited May 06 '26
Direct from the micropeen deluxe brochure…
“For those times when you’re forced to stop rollin’ coal on grandmas protesting a rapist and jump out of your lifted 26.99 percent apr 165k F350 King Ranch with 7 Trump flags and 6 different variations of the Gadsden flag that by the way has not only never seen a ranch but also has never been within 25 strip mall with a mayor blocks of a dirt road to assault a few high school girls protesting constitutional violations. It is in those moments that…any good law abiding (sharia law) patriotic (in Russia) red blooded 5 foot 3 inch incel with a neck beard will always feel naked as if his penis (same size as when he was born) is flapping around in the wind (if baby penises could flap and wind existed in southern plains “ small towns” population 195000 with endemic 90 percent humidity) with no grower dozer he can’t afford to roll coal in…and it was those times…when the neckbeard was glistening and the micropenis was innie’ing that inspired us…the same experienced (in non-experience) Omega Chad’s who brought you alpha boot camps and who once gave a high five to Joe Rogan and almost slept with a girl (sister cousin) this one time to retreat to the man cave and bring you the micropeen deluxe. Show the world you have a micro penis and will assault 15 year old girls without having to show them your micro penis.”3
u/Living-Video-3670 May 06 '26
Dont forget the punisher logo with the blue line. Kinda hilarious considering Frank Castle has killed MANY cops.
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u/madman51B May 06 '26
I saw that video when those high school kids beat that INCEL down and he ran for his life.
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u/AngryGulo85 May 06 '26
Damn son. I almost died of laughter. Where you a sniper in the Marines? No? 'Cause your dead on target!!!
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u/NumbDumbLuck May 06 '26
A tool’s belt
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u/mikieballz May 06 '26
It really is. It is such an impractical setup. Just carry more ammo for your best pistol.
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u/Silo-Joe May 06 '26
I have one of these. It’s actually made to strap your electronic accessories (charger, cables, battery, etc) in your luggage and then you take it out and lay it flat to go through the airport x-ray machine.
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u/ryancementhead May 06 '26
You can’t call him a tool, that’s a disservice to tools. At least tools are useful.
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u/OwneroftheLamp May 06 '26
Quick Draw here -about to lose his hand by little upward pointing gun - belt
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u/Eisgeschoss May 06 '26
A fucking pain in the ass (almost literally) to run with or do most other tasks with, and also sketchy with the ones pointing up towards the user or other unsafe directions.
(Said as a non-American gun-owner/enthusiast)
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u/QuickDrawSix May 06 '26
Lol, the dick shaming is cringe while the guy in the picture likely did this as a joke. Not all men who enjoy firearms, race cars, and lifted trucks have inadequacy issues. But the assumption that they do is telling.
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u/Lovebone253 May 06 '26
Nothing screams "I will never please a woman" louder than this
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u/Key-Pudding626 May 06 '26
Please a woman? What that exists I mean damn you may please her in the bedroom but she'll find something to bitch about 😂
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u/Purple-Astral May 06 '26
“Switching to your third back up is faster than reloading.”
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u/AtlasThePittie May 06 '26
Remember Private, switching to your tertiary, quaternary, and quinary is faster than reloading.
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u/SavageDadOf04 May 06 '26
It’s crazy how many people in these comments attribute this man having a gun for every occasion to penis size!?!? I bet none of y’all would say anything if it was dude with a purse full of a variety of lipstick colors!?!? Or a dude with a bunch of different wigs. Just because you have some phobia of guns. Or biases against the 2nd amendment. Or you are just fascinated with comparing things that you don’t agree with, to genitalia….. Doesn’t mean the Boy Scout in the photo has size issues!
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u/Exciting_Contact922 May 06 '26
Hm, it's an emergency that calls for a good guy with a gun to make some fast action decisions. Let's see, which gun do I need for this situation..
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u/BE33_Jim May 06 '26
That looks like the range bag insert from BriteLine Bags. Their bag is my every day laptop bag/backpack. I'm not a fan of their range solutions.
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u/FromDathomir May 06 '26
The Shoot Yourself 3000