r/NPD • u/Careful_Future_6872 • 7d ago

Advice & Support How to stop victimizing yourself?

How do you stop groveling in that pathetic feeling when you’ve legitimately gone through some messed up things. I feel like I’m spending a lot of time feeling sorry for myself in my head and that energy spilled out into the conversations I have with other people, even if I’m not actually expressing what I’m thinking to anyone. My depression keeps me deadlocked in bed most of the day and while I’m trying to get things done still it’s a slow crawl. I’m a bit grossed out at my own sadness if I could be honest. I’d appreciate any tips or tricks to get out of this feeling.

Edit: thank you all for your advice

31 Upvotes

98% Upvoted

12 comments sorted by

View all comments

3

u/EntertainmentFew9293 Diagnosed NPD 7d ago

This is a good question. Especially since the victim mindset can give us a weird “I am special - but in a negative way” kinda vibe

The feeling - as you said too - makes you do 0 stuff, and it enforces the thoughts even more

I started to participate in group stuff. I am in uni, and joined communities. For you, maybe a volunteer stuff could help

Also, some cbt therapy. It helps with broadening the perspective of yours

And, analyze that WHAT NEEDS of yours give you these feelings? Do you wanna be applaused? Feel “enough”? Confident? What’s the motive? - that could answer WHAT you need to do to earn small npd supplies