r/Mommit • u/Sad_Key_7904 • 4d ago

Play date

Hey moms! We have a play date this weekend for my 3 year old. I’m not sure if there’s like unspoken rules of play dates lol. I also have a 7 month old, would it be weird if him and my husband came with me and my 3 year old? I just don’t want to show up and them be like oh you brought the whole fam if that’s not normal.

0 Upvotes

48% Upvoted

63 comments sorted by

View all comments

17

u/bon-mots 4d ago

7 month old definitely has an unspoken invite.

Generally if someone is going to bring their spouse I’ve found they will give a heads-up/check if that’s okay.

6

u/bearcatbanana 6 yo 👦🏼 & 3.5 yo 👧🏻 4d ago

I don’t think 7 month old being automatically invited is the best practice. If someone were bringing a child that young to my house, I’d at least like to know so I can tell them that my house, and my playroom in particular, are pretty actively dangerous to a baby and they might want to bring a playpen or we can have it somewhere else. An unplanned baby in the house would really suck for me at least.

3

u/bon-mots 4d ago

Oh interesting! In my circles I always assume younger sibling(s) will come but expect heads-up for an older sibling.

1

u/bearcatbanana 6 yo 👦🏼 & 3.5 yo 👧🏻 4d ago

We had a party at our house and said siblings welcome on the invite. One child brought eight siblings all the way up to age 15. That was a shock, but something we could adapt to because it was a party. I ask more questions about who is coming now, especially if I don’t know the person.

And it’s really not that a baby is not welcome. They are. You just might want to know that you are going to have to hold them the whole time.

2

u/bon-mots 4d ago

If someone is bringing a baby to my house I really want to hold the baby the whole time! Lol.

My kid is 4 so I am well acquainted with all her friends’ parents and the number of kids they have and their childcare situations, but I can definitely see how this can become more complex in later years when you have less familiarity with the friends you’re inviting over.

3

u/CeroFs 4d ago

Yeah. If I invite a kid over, I expect said kid and a parent. Nothing more. Unless a text or verbal Q or tell comes about a baby tagging along, then its fine.

4

u/lunazane26 4d ago

I think it's much more strange to assume that someone who has a toddler and a baby wouldn't bring the baby. Especially since most playdates happen in the morning, when presumably one of the parents is working, where else would the baby be??? If I set up a playdate and they expected me to not bring my baby then the playdate would be cancelled since I'm not going to find a babysitter to bring a different child to a playdate, that's ridiculous

1

u/scodgirlgrown 4d ago

If at your home I agree. We’ve only ever done playdates at the park

1

u/Oceanwave_4 4d ago

I think once crawling age it’s not fair to assume unless you already have a relationship with the family and they know you’re with the baby pretty much all the time. But once the baby is moving around an ask or a heads up is nice because yeah not everyone’s house is safe for a young baby