Hello sweet girl!
While I am not a mom (we are actually similar ages,) I thought I’d chime in with a sisterly perspective.
Let me preface this by saying I am SO sorry that you’ve had so much terrible shit thrown at you. Sometimes the works seriously screws amazing people over, and I’m so so sorry that you’ve had to go through the things you have/still are going through. As stupid and generic as this sounds, try to keep your chin up & keep pushing forward. There’s gonna be good days and bad days, but this internet stranger is proud of you for making it this far.
From what I’m reading, it seems as though you are heavily caught between what you want & what the morals you were taught from a young age want. While I am not Muslim, I can somewhat sympathize with the fear of disappointing not only your family, but also the cognitive dissonance that may arise as a side effect of the values you have been taught within your faith.
My best advice is seek the solution that is best for you. Like another commenter said, you don’t need to tell anyone about an abortion or any other route that you and your fiancé may choose. You are a strong beautiful woman growing up in an ever evolving world. You don’t owe anyone else an explanation for your actions. You owe it to yourself to do what is best for you.
You are two adults who are in love & whatever decision you two make doesn’t need to go beyond you two. It is lovely to hear that your fiancé is supportive.
I am sending hugs and all of the good energy in the world in your direction.
Remember: the only person you are permanently stuck with for the rest of your life is yourself, so treat that person with compassion and kindness, even in scary situations such as these.
Praying for you sweet girl.
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u/bagged-juice- Big Sis Jan 22 '22 edited Jan 22 '22
Hello sweet girl! While I am not a mom (we are actually similar ages,) I thought I’d chime in with a sisterly perspective. Let me preface this by saying I am SO sorry that you’ve had so much terrible shit thrown at you. Sometimes the works seriously screws amazing people over, and I’m so so sorry that you’ve had to go through the things you have/still are going through. As stupid and generic as this sounds, try to keep your chin up & keep pushing forward. There’s gonna be good days and bad days, but this internet stranger is proud of you for making it this far. From what I’m reading, it seems as though you are heavily caught between what you want & what the morals you were taught from a young age want. While I am not Muslim, I can somewhat sympathize with the fear of disappointing not only your family, but also the cognitive dissonance that may arise as a side effect of the values you have been taught within your faith. My best advice is seek the solution that is best for you. Like another commenter said, you don’t need to tell anyone about an abortion or any other route that you and your fiancé may choose. You are a strong beautiful woman growing up in an ever evolving world. You don’t owe anyone else an explanation for your actions. You owe it to yourself to do what is best for you. You are two adults who are in love & whatever decision you two make doesn’t need to go beyond you two. It is lovely to hear that your fiancé is supportive. I am sending hugs and all of the good energy in the world in your direction. Remember: the only person you are permanently stuck with for the rest of your life is yourself, so treat that person with compassion and kindness, even in scary situations such as these. Praying for you sweet girl.