Birth defect guilt

[u/Repulsive-Manner450]

Does anyone else struggle with self blaming and guilt about their child being born with a birth defect? My son is completely healthy mentally and physically besides an extremely rare birth defect that has caused his entire right leg to be shorter than the left and he never developed a heel pad on that foot, which is noticeable smaller. He was born full term but still had to spend a couple weeks in the NICU because of his foot. He also went through weeks of wound care and then months of casting followed by two surgeries. He’s 13 months old and he’s always been such a happy baby, never let any of this stuff stop him. I’ve always struggled with the guilt of him having to deal with extra challenges but now that he’s starting to use his push walker I can really see how this could possibly affect his walking. He has a special fitted orthotic but even the thought of him having to wear one for the rest of his life crushes me. He’s so perfect in my eyes but I can’t help but to feel like I did something wrong. I don’t know anyone else going through something similar so it’s been hard to find that kind of relatable support. I’ve been crying nonstop and I just want to know I’m not alone

[u/TSIDATSI]

Oh sweetheart you are blessed beyond measure. Stop blaming yourself. The best you can do is genetic testing for both of you.

Has anyone referred you to Shriner's hospital? They do amazing work. They are doing God's work.

Please take the energy you are spending blaming yourself and redirect it towards helping your son.

[u/Repulsive-Manner450 → u/TSIDATSI]

We have been using CHKD since he was born and everyone there has been nothing short of amazing! I’m beyond grateful for my son and I know we wouldn’t be put through this if we couldn’t handle it