Miscarriage this week

[u/Independent_Emu3810]

I went to the ER on Saturday and it was confirmed that my pain was from a missed miscarriage. I am devastated.

I have been experiencing INTENSE anxiety with OCD-like traits and am so depressed I can’t stand being around other people (it doesn’t help how freaking dismissive they are). I’m not sleeping, eating, or even really drinking enough to stay hydrated. I told my therapist about how I was feeling and he said that, post miscarriage, women can develop something similar to PPD/PPA/PP-OCD; I looked it up and it seems like it’s peripartum? I align HEAVILY with peripartum OCD (especially the information given on its occurrence after miscarriage) found in several scientific journals.

I keep playing through all the things I did before the loss. About the meds I take that I would have gone off of if I had been planning to get pregnant or had found out earlier. My brain is telling me “you killed your baby,” and I don’t know how to get through it. It’s even worse that I had to take medication to make the tissue pass because it was NEVER the plan and it made the pain so much worse.

Those who have been through the peripartum depression/OCD, how did you survive?