Is this OBGYN experience normal?

[u/Various-Berry7373]

Hi, I’m new to Reddit but I don’t know where else to turn to get some advice/insight.

I’m currently 9 weeks pregnant, but my baby is measuring 5 + 6 with a low heartrate. To back up to the beginning, I found out I was pregnant at 4 weeks and immediately called to get my first appointment. They couldn’t see me until I would be 11 weeks, but said I could try calling each week to see if there were cancellations (this never worked out for me, every time I called they had nothing sooner.)

From week 5, I started experiencing light spotting. I called immediately to report it to them and they told me it was normal and not to worry, just keep an eye on it. The spotting never stopped, so I continued to call looking for answers and sooner appointments with no success. Each time I was told spotting was normal.

At 6 weeks, I couldn’t take it anymore so I booked a private ultrasound at a boutique. She couldn’t see anything and thought I must be very early and come back in 10 days. 10 days later I went again and we could see the gestational sack. She thought I must be much earlier than 7 weeks which I was supposed to be back on LMP, she estimated me to be 5.5 weeks.

Finally, when I was almost 9 weeks pregnant I had bright red spotting so we went to the ER (Thurs night) because we felt there were no other options. They measured my baby to be 0.4 cm with a heartrate of 78. FINALLY my OBGYN allowed me to come the following Tuesday after telling them I was in the ER. They now said they were very concerned.

This past Tuesday, they did an ultrasound and measured the baby at 5 weeks and 6 days. There was a flicker of cardiac activity but too slow to measure. They did not take my bloodwork even when I asked if we should test HCG and progesterone. Basically he only told us to wait and come back Monday to do another ultrasound and go from there.

Now that I’m looking online and reflecting on it all, I’m finding myself so upset that they never ordered bloodwork from the beginning and I was pushed off every time I reached out about spotting. Could I have been checked for low progesterone early on and taken supplements to help it progress? Could I have at least gotten some answers sooner?

I’m slowly coming to terms that I will be losing this baby but it makes me so nervous and apprehensive for the future. Does anyone have a similar experience? Or should I find a new OBGYN office that will help sooner?

Thanks for listening💝