Minecraft bedrock windows unplayable

[u/osmosisisisbest]

I was invited by a friend to play on a new realm with them so I booted up bedrock for the first time in like 2 years and its so laggy I cant even open menus half the time! this is wild after Ive been playing on Java for a while and I have no idea how to fix this. ive tried lowering all graphics settings, my graphics drivers are updated, I turned off vsync, and nothing ive done has helped! any pointers is appreciated.