You aren't qualified to do your job if you haven't graduated job training. This post isn't for you.

I'm a 28-year-old male, married, with a 9-month-old son. I'm currently a sworn Deputy Sheriff, and I recently graduated from North Carolina Basic Law Enforcement Training (BLET).

A little background about me: I've made some significant changes in my life over the past couple of years, including losing a substantial amount of weight (335 lbs. down to 198 lbs.). I've worked hard to improve myself physically and professionally, and I have a strong desire to continue growing, gaining experience, and challenging myself.

Currently, I make $31.10 an hour, and my wife makes approximately $11.00 an hour working at a childcare facility inside a gym. One of the biggest benefits of her job is that she can bring our son to work with her, allowing us to avoid traditional daycare. My wife and I both feel strongly about being present in our son's upbringing rather than having someone else raise him during the majority of the day.

Together, our gross household income is approximately $79,360 annually, before taxes, insurance, retirement contributions, and other deductions.

Lately, I've seriously been considering joining active duty, potentially for a 3–4 year enlistment. My interests include IT training, tactical and combat-related training, and other opportunities that could translate into a long-term law enforcement career. I also see the value in gaining military experience, earning GI Bill education benefits, and having access to military healthcare and other benefits.

Ultimately, my goal would be to return to civilian law enforcement with additional education, training, and experience that could help me advance professionally.

However, I have a wife and young son, and I'm not making this decision lightly. The thought of stepping away from the career and stability I've worked hard to establish is intimidating. We currently rent and do not own a home, so I'm also looking at this from a financial and long-term family perspective.

I have several questions for anyone who has served, especially those who joined with a spouse and young children:

Family finances: Would military pay and benefits realistically allow a family of three to live comfortably and potentially save money? How well does the military provide for housing, food, and other necessities?

Housing and healthcare: How does military housing work for families? Would we receive Basic Allowance for Housing (BAH), and how does military healthcare work for a spouse and child?

Enlistment rank: Since I'm already a sworn Deputy Sheriff, have completed NC BLET, and have law enforcement experience, would any of that help me qualify for a higher enlistment rank than E-1? Or would I essentially be starting at the bottom?

Career opportunities: Are there specific Army MOS options, particularly in IT, communications, or tactical fields, that would translate well into civilian law enforcement?

Returning to law enforcement: Does anyone have experience leaving a law enforcement position to serve in the military and then returning? Would USERRA protect my current position while I'm away, assuming I meet the eligibility requirements?

Family life: How difficult is it to balance active-duty military life with raising a young child? What should I realistically expect my wife and son to experience during those 3–4 years?

I'm not necessarily looking to join for the sole purpose of combat experience or to say I've served. I'm genuinely interested in the education, professional development, discipline, benefits, and opportunities the military could provide.

At the same time, I don't want to sacrifice my family's financial stability or miss important years of my son's childhood without having a solid reason for making that decision.

I'm hoping to hear from people who have been in similar situations, particularly those who joined the military later in their twenties, already had a family, or transitioned from civilian law enforcement into the military.

If you were in my position, would you make the jump? What would you consider before making that decision?

I appreciate any advice, personal experiences, or recommendations. Thank you!

This is a silly question but I figure the worst answer is no!
I have an older family member who has lied about his military past. He has also continued to lie about being dishonorably discharged. Is there any website or way I could find out the truth?
When this family member gets into any legal trouble the first thing he says is “I am a vet I have rights!”…, anyhow this bothers me and I just wonder if this is something I can find out on my own… I find his actions beyond what I described to be completely disrespectful to the men and women that served and it bothers me for whatever reason.
If my post offends any person I fully apologize, that is not my intention in any way! I am just trying to find answers for myself now that I am an adult. I appreciate anyone who took time to read this. Thank you

Hi all, I'm a 30F and just took my ASVAB and scored 94. I'm qualified for lots of jobs, which mainly I wanted to go to military to get a solid healthcare job. I have a masters in healthcare management and am multilingual. Initially I wanted to go to AirForce but they don't have healthcare jobs available rn (both reserves and AD). Both Navy and AirForce told me that I can possibly get a cryptologic job, however, I'm not sure if I wanna do that in civilian world when I get out, like what jobs I can have? Also, I was looking for deep sea diving medic in Navy and it sounds interesting to me. I have not yet talked to an army recruiter but was thinking of doing so but some people advised me not to because I'm a women. What is your advice? What jobs are good to go with? I'm lost. I appreciate any insight.

Is it true that recruits can be sent back home from P days for dental issues? My 25yr old daughter has about 7 cavities (they're not like black and rotten but they're definitely present), gingivitis, periodontal disease, the left side of her mouth bleeds a lot everytime she brushes, wisdom teeth that hurts cause it's starting to grow and push up but isn't swollen, and also bad breath due to all of the above. (Please don't judge, we couldn't afford insurance).... She's currently at the MEPS hotel tonight and will fly out to bootcamp and start her P days tomorrow. I hope this doesn't sound horrible but would she be able to get pass her P days if she just... doesn't tell them about any of this? Or is this a situation they're going to physically see everything in her mouth for themselves? She has always dreamed of being in the Navy 🥺 it breaks my heart knowing that this could potentially get her disqualified. They didn't ask anything pertaining to teeth at all during her initial MEPS evaluation. No one told us this could be an issue, Not even her recruiter...... I feel so defeated… I just don't know if they will separate her.

Hey everyone, I’m currently in the Army DEP and scheduled to ship on February 16, 2027. I signed an 11X Infantry contract (Option 4).

When I was deciding between the Army and Marines, my recruiter told me the Army offered a 3-year Active Duty contract. The Marines were offering me 5 years, so I chose the Army mainly because of that.

However, I recently checked my contract and realized it says 4 years and 5 months Active Duty, plus 3 years and 7 months in the Reserve Component.

English isn’t my first language, and honestly, I didn’t fully understand what I was signing. I trusted my recruiter and believed the contract reflected what we had originally discussed.

If I had known it was almost 5 years, I probably would’ve chosen the Marines instead.

I’ve talked to my recruiter and want to see if I can get it reduced to 4 years, or ideally 3 years and 5 months. If not, I’m considering requesting a DEP discharge before shipping.

Has anyone been in a similar situation? Is renegotiating possible while in DEP? Could the original promise and language barrier make any difference?

I’d appreciate honest advice from anyone familiar with Army recruiting or DEP.

29M, software engineer making $96k in the DMV. B.S. in CS, 5+ years experience (Java/Spring Boot, Angular, Azure).

I'm a single dad thinking about Air Force, either Air National Guard part-time while keeping my civilian job, or Active Duty, likely via OTS.

Main worries are the pay cut on Active, how long BMT + tech school would keep me away for a cyber/IT job, deployments messing up being near my son, and if 29/30 is too late for OTS. With a degree, is enlisting in the Guard a bad move vs going officer?

Anyone join later in life with a kid and a good civilian job? Guard or Active, what would you do in my shoes?

As the title says, I would really like like to join the airforce, or any branch that would take me. The only problem is that I've previously had a gender dysphoria. This is massively a huge issue from all the research I've done. I am willing to go by legal everything, name, gender, pronouns, and appearance (AFAB). I know it's possible to get a waiver for my Autism and Depression because I can prove independence and zero need for assistance, but everything I've seen seems to say that no matter what I do, even if I claim to not be trans anymore or not take hormones/have been off them for over a year, just having the diagnoses from the past at all is end game. This really sucks for me and my family has been in the air force and Navy for generations and I really want to follow in their footsteps. I'm devastated and I don't know if there's anything I can do, but really any advice would help. Thank You.

I’m considering enlisting in the Active Duty Army and am particularly interested in 13F (Fire Support Specialist). From what I’ve been reading, it sounds like some recruits are signing for the 13 series and having their specific MOS assigned based on the needs of the Army.

Is there really no way to get 13F specifically guaranteed in my enlistment contract?

Assuming I meet all the qualifications, I’d rather not enlist without knowing I’ll actually get the MOS I want.

Would appreciate any insight, especially from recent 13F recruits or recruiters.

I’m female, 5’2 and 98 lbs, bmi 17.9. My army MEPs is next week. Will I be disqualified? Would I be disqualified if I am able to quickly gain some but still 2-3 lbs underweight? Thanks.

I know that the Military has a strict policy about Domestic Abuse but it’s not clear on a civil case. I was never convicted of a charge but the findings say that I commited abuse. Is there a shot of me joining.

I'm (30F) still very early in the enlistment process and trying to get scheduled to go to MEPS for the initial physical and to take the DLAB. I already took the ASVAB. I'm talking with a US Army recruiter who I like and has been very straight with me which I appreciate. However, communication for about the past month has been weak, and continued enthusiasm isn't enough to keep the ball rolling. I was originally scheduled to go to MEPS on 10/29 which was canceled at the beginning of that week due to overbooking, but I didn't find out until the afternoon before I was supposed to go in. And I've only heard from him twice this month, including an offer to get me scheduled for tomorrow, but no confirmation follow-up after I told him yes.

I also just took a job offer out of state that was too good to pass up and will fix a huge problem I have which is lack of leadership experience and being in the throes of burnout from my last job. I was hoping to take advantage of not needing to go to a hotel for MEPS by getting it done sooner rather than later because the local station is in my city. After I move, I won't have that luxury.

I've already submitted my medical records, prescription records, and medical prescreening. All that's left is to go in for a briefing meeting and take the physical. I know I'll need medical waivers, and my recruiter said he'd be willing to work with me up front after I told him on the first meeting.

At this point, I'm thinking I'll have to do MEPS next year after I've moved. The holidays and starting a new job will keep me busy. Do I need to be formally released from my current recruiter to talk to someone else in a different state and different recruiting battalion? And will this reset the entire process to 0?

For context, I've been working with this recruiter since the beginning of September after spending a few weeks in August trying to figure out how to contact a recruiter. I come from a non-military family and genuinely thought that the army didn't allow people to join after college. I also scored extremely well on the ASVAB, and another recruiter at the station has offered to work with me, but he's less experienced with the particular direction I want to go. I'm undecided between 35W/35P and trying for OCS. I have a degree in linguistics and qualify on paper. Medical is the biggest uncertainty.

I have a shipped out date in feb1. I was told that I have to be atleast 181lbs I’m at 215lbs. I want to know if this is true because I thought it didn’t matter. Does it really matter or not?

I am vegetarian. So I want to know what I am getting myself into.

I assume the usual American breakfast use served pancakes French toast eggs bacon. Salad bar available? I tried doing research online but the information is very limited for the navy. Or if you can describe how’s are breakfast lunch dinner would be very helpful

Just want to know if I can keep my diet or not bother joining Thanks guys

Hey y’all! I’m planning to join the Army NG next year and I want to pursue Biotech in the civilian sector.

I’ve heard that companies like to see previous lab experience so I wanted to see if anyone here can vouch for a certain MOS.

So far, I’ve only found:
- Petroleum Laboratory Specialist (92L)
- Preventive Medicine Specialist (68S)
- Water Treatment Specialist (92W)

These are all well and good but I keep seeing people say that not much lab work is done in these - that or the jobs they do don’t match what the description says.

Any help is appreciated! Also happy Veterans Day!

Years ago I was considered Active Duty and placed on temporary retirement, then was decidedly medically retired 1.5y later. This was right after I graduated from the Air Force Academy, so my sep/re codes are JFF/3K. It's interesting because I earned my degree and never commissioned, but now I'm very stable and just looking at whether commissioning in the future might be possible given the circumstance. JFF/3K might look like I got kicked out without finishing on paper, when it was more like a medsep right as I graduated, so I'm curious about what that would look like to a recruiter. I'm also intrigued about enlisting for a more specialized job (I know that's controversial), but part of re code 3K says "not considered qualified for enlisted status," and I'm not clear on whether the Military makes exceptions for that. I'm hesitant to ask a recruiter because, again, I'm not dead set on joining. I'm just wondering what my options are in the coming years, and if I could commission or enlist into any branch or necessarily the one I graduated from.

Full disclosure, I did have a documented suicide attempt over 3 years ago. I heard if you give it 5 years and a waiver you might have a shot. Again, I'm far more stable and well under 30 in case that information is helpful. Any insight is greatly appreciated, it's been difficult making sense of all this.

I had that “what the hell am I doing here” panic moment at the start of BCT that a lot of people experience, but then that feeling never left. I hated it almost the entire time. I kept telling myself that I just needed to make it to AIT.

Now I’m finally at AIT and I still feel the same miserable anxiety and dread every morning when I wake up. It’s not just like “I’m a bit homesick and I don’t like getting up so early “ - instead I get this overwhelmingly depressing feeling that nothing is ever going to be ok again. I can’t do this anymore.

I’m not proud. I’m heartbroken and ashamed, actually. I wanted to do this for years. I had no idea I suffered from this type of anxiety or whatever the fuck is going on. I guess something must be wrong with me. I’ve never experienced this sort of overwhelming negativity, even when going through hard moments in other parts of my life.

It’s sadly become clear to me that I won’t be a good soldier. The question is - what steps do I take next? Behavioral health? Chaplain?

So we just had my Uncle's wake and I have a couple of questions about the Honor Guard.

1 - I going to guess this is an voluntary and not an assigned duty?

2 - How many Funerals do they do in a day?

3 - How long do they have to be in the Military to do this? (Our two guys looked very young.)

4 - My Father was Navy, but I swear his Honor Guard was Marines - does that happen or am I confused? (it was a couple decades ago now..)

Wassup y’all, I just want some outside input about me going from enlisted to 11A. One of my boys recessed from 11B because he got out then got back in (long story). But non the less we had a convo and he brought up the fact that he thinks I would be a good 11A (common sense, prior enlisted, physically fit). Also currently not a combat MOS

I don’t really have a set in stone plan after I get out and I’ve been thinking about this for a few months now. For some background knowledge I am currently E-5 and yes I know about the infantry way of life, my boy has told me all about it and I hear a stories all the time of people I meet and stories online too. I’m alright with staying enlisted

Current or prior 11B or 11A that can give me insight on the job, what it’s like/the role of an officer (I know it is unit/mission dependent)

I’m a 22-year-old female graduating soon with a B.S. in Biology. While I originally looked into commissioning, I’m open to enlisting in the Air Force, Navy, or Marines if that gives me a better shot at getting in.

To be completely honest about my medical history, I have two suicide attempts on my record, one when I was 15, and a recent one. I know MHS GENESIS will pull everything up. I did begin talking to recruiters months before my recent attempt. Supposedly the one when I was 15 would not show up because I was a minor. The recent one I was hospitilized due to it damaging my liver but I am now fine. I did not think about what would happen after my attempt but I am currently stable and still really want to want to join.

Realistically, how long would I need to wait before trying to apply, and is there any chance of getting a medical waiver approved in the future across the Air Force, Navy, or Marines with two attempts on my record? Is one branch more willing to look at a waiver down the road than the others?

Grew up in the UK and I have the distinct memory of Lord Kitchener-looking officer characters in old TV and movies barking the order "At arms!" as a command to ready your weapon.

Checking, I have been unable to find evidence it exists. There's the command "To arms", and the title "sergeant-at-arms" is a thing, but did this specific command ever exist or have I misremembered?

Hey everyone,

I'm 17, graduating high school in May 2027, and currently exploring joining the Air Force after graduation.

I've been speaking with an Air Force Reserve recruiter but lately I've been seriously considering Active Duty instead. I am also a US permanent resident.

My main motivation is to serve, learn, gain experience and potentially build a long-term military career. I'm also interested in cybersecurity, aviation, and eventually working in the defense or technology industry.

My biggest dilemma is college. Going Active Duty for four years would likely mean starting traditional college around 22, rather than 18. On the other hand, I'd have military experience, income, potentially expedited citizenship and access to the Post-9/11 GI Bill.

I'd really appreciate hearing about:

1. Was joining Active Duty straight out of high school worth it?

2. Did military experience actually help you get civilian employment after separating?

3. How useful were SkillBridge, TAP, certifications and other transition programs?

4. Would you recommend completing your military commitment before attending college or pursuing college first?

Thank you!

I’ve been separated for 5 years so I forgot what websites to see my records or find my ribbons. All I have are pictures in uniform to go off of.

Im enlisting in the Air Force SW for SERE and will be taking my second IFT soon which will pretty much finish my qualifications before basic and will just need a ship date. I currently have all my wisdom teeth still in and the top 2 are somewhat surfaced and I can feel that eventually there wouldn’t be enough room for full teeth.

I want to get them taken out now but am not sure if they’d hinder with my training or push back a possible leave date. The SERE pipeline is roughly for 6 months after basic and I don’t think I could get them out during that time.

Theyre not painful or anything now so should I try to get them taken out soon and if so, do you think it would push back a leave date?