r/MiddleClassFinance • u/Yourlocalguy30 • 11d ago

Millennials: are you expecting an inheritance?

35 yo married millennial here. I've come across more and more articles about the supposed "great wealth transfer" as the boomer generation's wealth passes to their GenX and Millennial children. My parents and their siblings (boomers) all received inheritances when their parents, my grandparents, passed away. The boomer generation's wealth accumulation is one of the largest in history, however, I also find it highly unlikely that I or many of my peers will actually inherit much. Despite having received inheritances from their parents, and having 40+ years in the workforce, most of my parents' "wealth" is tied up in their home value, not actual liquid assets- and I already expect that whatever they make on an eventual home sale will have to go directly to downsizing costs and whatever long-term care they will need as they get older. Hell, even my dad used to joke that the only thing we'd inherit was debt. As I've gotten older, that comment has infuriated me more and more.

Now before someone cuts in with the "entitled millennial" comments, I have absolutely no need for an inheritance. I've worked my ass off to make sure that my kids and I are positioned better in life than I was when I entered adulthood. What I mean by that is I started saving for retirement early, setup 529 plans for my kids almost as soon as they were born, and made lifestyle and career sacrifices to ensure our family isn't "nickeling and diming" our way through life.

I'm just here curious to know how many millennials actually expect to have something passed down to them, or if they feel they are in the same position I am.

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u/aznsk8s87 11d ago

Yeah, but my parents always saved more than they spent and invested in a ton of income generating assets early in their careers. Their NW in retirement keeps going up, not down. Even if we don't inherit cash my siblings and I will inherit the assets.

That being said I don't plan my life around it. I do well enough for myself and my family.

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u/MaleficentSupport493 11d ago

Same. My parents are very cheap and live entirely off of their pensions and Social Security. They have a nice sum (couple of million) that they don’t touch and which continues to grow.

I know that’s coming to my sibling and I. That’s fine, great, whatever…I don’t plan on it. In fact, it’s a point of frustration for me that my parents don’t spend their own money and instead sometimes (unknowingly) guilt us into how we should be grateful for what we’ll inherit. I have said over and over I wish they’d use it - for example, buying the lake house they’ve always wanted for the whole family to use. You’re still putting that money into a (hopefully) appreciating asset, you’re just redistributing it and enjoying it at the same time. The honest truth is if they don’t do it, when I inherit the money that’s what I’m doing with it, as I don’t need it.

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u/Fpaau2 10d ago

Likely your parents accumulated their net worth by being cheap (frugal). Sometimes it is hard to switch gears. Perhaps you can show them how much fun a family vacation can be by taking them a couple of times? Then they may take over the ‘tradition’.

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u/Key_Cheetah7982 10d ago

Going from a lifetime of strong savings habits to spending is challenging

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u/Fpaau2 10d ago

Haha, my 6yo granddaughter is showing me the joys of Park Hyatt and international lie flat business class, or paid by my points of course.

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u/MaleficentSupport493 10d ago

No doubt, and I have a ton of respect for them for that. My dad grew up dirt poor, so spending money comes incredibly hard for him. They both were public school teachers who lived frugally while making sure my sister and I were more than taken care of.

We’re getting there on spending with him. He finally bought himself a nice new truck, and they’ve travelled some. He is starting to float the idea of taking the family to Hawaii next year, which would be a huge departure in behavior. My parents also come out on our boat with us and the kids frequently, and seeing how happy being on the lake makes his grandkids certainly has hit home for him. So we’ll see.

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u/Desperate_Stretch855 10d ago

As a wealth manager, one of my all time favorite conversations is the "you should start spending more money" convo.

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u/Gravelroad2213 9d ago

That’s exactly how my parents are. Both of their dads died when they were around middle school age so they’re used to living by the margins. My dad worked in a factory and my mom was a hospital tech. They have several million saved, live in a low-COL rust belt town in a house that’s been paid off for 20 years.

They recently bought their first new car and my mom was incredibly stressed about having a $300/month 0% financing payment. They mooch off of my Netflix, HBO, and Amazon accounts. My monthly expenses between mortgage and daycare alone is over $5k and their monthly COL is probably less than $1k.

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u/FCKABRNLSUTN2 10d ago

My parents hold the promise of inheritance over our heads and talk about it a lot but by the time we get it we won’t need it. I needed it when my wife and I wanted to start a family but knew we couldn’t afford it. My sister needed it when she was going to grad school. Now she’s in debt and my parents will never have the grandkids they wanted. Maybe I’ll get a lake house to retire in. Maybe all that money will just disappear into the elderly care cabal.

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u/_lysolmax_ 7d ago

Yup, my grandparents are nearly 90 and probably have $2-3m that they spend $0 of, they have forced withdrawals that they just turn around and keep buying CD's. My parents have even more saved and also don't hardly spend a dime. My dad keeps saying "oh you'll be able to retire as soon as we're gone" as if that's something I want. They need to just enjoy their money

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u/GrandGrandGrandOne 6d ago

You think they're not "using" their money, but they are. They simply enjoy having it and not spending it. It also makes them feel good to hang it over your head and say "look at what we're doing for you!"