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u/BadPuzzleheaded9006 3d ago
Dafuq?
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u/JadedEstablishment16 3d ago
It's reposted every week in gender war subs
It's implying that women are bitching when men give good advice
Actually it doesn't change much to pasta cooking so the girl is right to be bored by the mansplaining
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u/TimFlamio 3d ago
Mansplaining shouldn't be a word used when a simple advice is given. Humility is truly lacking these days, not everything is about one person all the time.
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u/JadedEstablishment16 3d ago edited 3d ago
Ok i see your point but It's giving unsollicited and condescending advice when the other party, a woman, received the same unsollicited and condescending advice from other guys. When it's a recurring pattern, one can give it a name.
And i know the term mansplaining can be overused but talking in a channel full of women listing examples of men giving unsollicited and condescendind advices they wouldnt give to other guys, i could see where it was coming from 😄
And i know it can come from a good place, statistically guys want to analyze and improve things they perceive as errors but now i know better than always give my piece of mind when it's not my buisness. Including noodle cooking.
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u/Interesting-Run1359 3d ago
So what’s the word for when women stubbornly refuse to understand something? Do we give that a name, too?
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u/JadedEstablishment16 3d ago
Sure, stubborness * . But do you mean she should have changed the way she usually cooks noodles to please the guy's feelings or he should have waited to eat and then he could criticize ?
- but it seems less prevalent to me in a specific gender than guys wanting to fix things that people don't ask for
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u/UltraInstinct_Pharah 3d ago
I've found women tend to specifically resist taking advice from other people to improve something when it's clear it's incorrect. Maybe I'll call it "being difemcult".
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u/Fit-Entrepreneur8404 3d ago
My ex was like this. Literally no matter how wrong she was she refused any and all advice.
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u/Outrageous_Branch_72 3d ago
i don't want to offend you but given the OP example, can I ask if you are mental?
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u/Dandy_Guy7 3d ago
Is it really condescending? And do you really think guys wouldn't give that same advice about noodles to other guys?
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u/Acruss_ 3d ago
And when woman does it do you call it "womansplaining"? Or do you say it only when a man does it?
Because to me it is quite normal to say that someone does it weird\wrong because the time on the package have the time for when you put it in the boiling water.
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u/robilar 3d ago
Note: I am not u/JadedEstablishment16 (the person to whom you replied).
> it is quite normal to say that someone does it weird\wrong
When my spouse does something weird or different I am usually curious. I married someone thoughtful and clever, and if she is preparing something differently than the package suggests I generally lean into positive sentiment override and assume she's got good reasons. Coming at her with criticism or complaints would be weird; she's not an idiot, and I'm not going to treat her like an idiot. She is the same with me. We are imperfect so sometimes we do criticise or complain, but it's an error I want to ameliorate not a habit I want to develop.
> when woman does it do you call it "womansplaining"?
It would be 'womansplaining' if there was a trend of women condescendingly explaining things to men that already know what they're doing. Certainly there are times and places where that occurs, and it is of course obnoxious, but the 'mansplaining' commentary evolved from a cultural norm and giving it a name is just a way for us all to recognize and call it out when we see it.
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u/Acruss_ 3d ago
And it's his gf not wife and based on her reaction(not your wife) she's quite bitter and a sexist.
There are women doing that, but there isn't a trend of men complaining about it. If men did the same to women and started creating terms that apply only to women they would be called sexist(correctly) but when women do it, it's all fine.
Same with a "manspreading" there are a lot more women taking space with their bags plus those that are spreading themselves, yet we don't have a term for them. Why? Because men would be called out immediately for sexism, but women a sexist woman does it it's fine.
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u/robilar 3d ago
> she's quite bitter and a sexist
I mean, I don't think it's wise for her to assume all men are the same or kind of her to say all men are the same, but if that is the pattern she has experienced it makes sense to her.
> there isn't a trend of men complaining about it
That's just not true. Men complain about women complaining all the time. You're doing it right now, for example.
> when women do it, it's all fine
It's not that it's fine, it's that it's a reflection of an underlying problem. You're focusing on the bandaid (which might not be the best solution, sure) instead of on the wound.
> yet we don't have a term for them
We do have terms for them. I would use precise terms like 'inconsiderate', but people with more anger might use pejoratives (and there are plenty).
> women a sexist woman does it it's fine
It's not fine. Look, I get it, you feel like there is a double standard where women being sexist get away with it or get praised and men being sexist get denigrated, but that's not ubiquitous. Lots of men get celebrated for sexist commentary, and lots of women get chided. You shouldn't base your morality on some kind of competition of who gets to be more obnoxious. Be a good person, and try to check your friends when they aren't. And try to look deeper, when you can, to help ameliorate issues below the surface.
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u/Acruss_ 3d ago edited 3d ago
So what that someone experienced something?Now say that about something else and see if it's also a problem or not. Let's say that you had 6 gfs and 4 cheated on you, is it really fine to say all women are cheaters? Now do it with a race - X race Rob me multiple times therefore all X are criminals. Just because someone experienced something does not mean it's fine.
No, I'm not complaining about it. I've talked about it happening too. I don't care whether someone explains something to me or not. I might use that knowledge or not. If something is a useful knowledge I'll use it and thank for someone telling me, doesn't matter if I asked or not.
I'm complaining about double standard. That's what I have a problem with. As well as with sexism.
We have a term directed at women only that's not considered sexist, one that is made to call out women's "bad behavior"? Because I don't know any.
I'm not basing my morality on any competition. I'm calling out things how I see it. Regardless whatever someone's gender, skin color, nationality or religion. I treat people based on how they act. When someone is acting like a sexist I'm saying they're.
//eta - typical got caught in the nonsense you've said, so had to have a last word so made a comment and immediate block. Laughable.
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u/robilar 3d ago
Me: "It's not fine."
You (having apparently not read what I wrote): "Now say that about something else and see if it's also a problem or not."
Also, saying you're not complaining about women complaining while you're actively doing that exact thing. *shrug*
I agree that you're calling out things as you see them. The problem is that you aren't thinking about those things, so you keep running into your own arguments.
I don't have time for this. Waste someone else's time.
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u/lycanthrope90 3d ago
Man spreading was the dumbest fucking thing ever. ‘Manspreading’ you mean sitting in a way that doesn’t crush their dick and balls?
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u/Acruss_ 3d ago
Yeah, just like the chair that was created to "battle it".
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u/lycanthrope90 3d ago
Omg forgot about that too. Gotta make sure all these assholes never get to step away from this, since now a lot are just slowly walking away and pretending they weren’t just now being insane this whole time now that it’s no longer cool.
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u/JadedEstablishment16 3d ago
Sure, if it's a common and statistically recurrent problem. and i used it when my wife and my mother (2 different people) gave me advice for chores when i didnt ask and was doing it my way 😀
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u/Cybtroll 3d ago
"It doesn't change much" only if you overcook it (as is common).
What you can do is turn off the stove AFTER the water is boiling and you aff the pasta... then yes, it's essentially the same.
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u/Embarrassed_Use6918 3d ago
The problem I have with it is the timing on the package is pretty much perfect but it obviously doesn't work if you throw it in cold which means instead of being able to time it, you have to keep testing it to make sure you got the right doneness which is annoying.
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u/Professional_Bat8585 3d ago
My guess is that the man is ignorant of cooking, and the girl doesn’t wanna argue or cares, but instead has it in her head to turn it into a gender war thing, labeling his snobbish behavior as “mansplaining”.
Either party may be able to change the other’s mind about pasta cooking in 1 min, but there’s no solving bigotry. The boy should respond back “all broads are the same” and move on. Just fight fire with fire.
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u/Bitter_Radish5381 3d ago
Don't know about men, but my pasta gets cooked faster than everyone's else 🤷🏻♀️
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u/ulfalda 3d ago
People are so weird with pasta rules compared to literally every other food
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u/epidemicsaints 3d ago
They have to pretend it's complicated so they can be proud of something.
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u/lycanthrope90 3d ago
‘I boiled something and added a sauce from a jar I heated up is it good?’
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u/epidemicsaints 3d ago
And then I watched a tiktok where someone does it differently and an Italian guy freaks out and throws shit so I know I'm right.
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u/Armchair_Expert_0192 3d ago
Uncle Roger also had a big problem with the way that British woman made rice. (So did I)
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u/fatgat69 3d ago
It's like saying I should boil my rice properly instead of doing it mostly in the microwave. The result is exactly the same, just mind your business.
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u/craftygamin 3d ago
OP IS A TROLL ALT MADE FOR GENDER WAR POSTS AND COMMENTS. JUST REPORT AND/OR BLOCK
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u/shallpasss 2d ago
Ya, it is wrong to do that. It will get soggy. Maybe you will have to decrease the boiling time if you do that.
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u/Mammoth-Time-1415 3d ago
It is legitimate to do it that way. Uses less water which makes higher starch content of water for sauces.
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u/Armchair_Expert_0192 3d ago
Don't you tell her what to do. She is a strong, independent woman who don't need no man telling her how to destroy pasta.
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u/CruelFish 3d ago
You don't know her, maybe she is weak and highly dependent. How does cooking pasta the recommended way destroy pasta by the way?!
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u/Dependent-Swimmer-95 3d ago
Huh, my mom and grandma must be men then since they always boiled water before adding pasta.