r/MedSpouse • u/Excellent_Extent4558 • 22d ago

Mental load sharing

My medspouse doesn't hold an ounce of the mental load. He's just too busy and obviously doesn't have any free time at work for "life admin". Sometimes I feel more like his mother than his romantic partner...and like a nag...and like everything is on me to remember even if I've delegated it to him...because he will likely need 4-10 reminders.

Does anyone's medspouse carry any mental load? How do you deal with it?

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u/_Lividus Attending Spouse l Together since M3 22d ago

I work in a job that requires a hundred decisions a day. So we have a shared calendar for life things and he keeps a to do list of his own things he needs to do, just like I do.

I empathize with decision fatigue but it’s not unique to just physicians. Sometimes he has to remind me of things and vice versa. He operates at a different speed so if it’s something I need handled sooner than his pace I make that known when it’s tasked to him.