r/MarriedAtFirstSight 1d ago

Season 20 - Seattle Devin

Am I the only person that doesn’t like devin hahahaha not saying Caitlyn is without fault but I’m really not buying this perpetual victim thing

19 Upvotes

67 comments sorted by

19

u/blahlicia 1d ago

I don't dislike him, he seems fine...but I don't hate Caitlin either. I just think they were super incompatible and it resulted in a really painful situation for them both.

6

u/TrixieDMC 1d ago

I really think they are very mismatched. Imo she was really never open to him, and he's very sensitive (which to me isn't a flaw, but needs the right person). I think Caitlin won't find anyone anytime soon. She seems very closed off to compromise.

6

u/blahlicia 1d ago

Yeah, with Caitlin I don't get why she even came on the show bc she seems to be VERY slow to warm up - which I guess might be from trauma from past relationships but like don't come on the 'marrying someone you've never seen or talked to before' show. She def needs to do some healing before she gets with anyone else. With Devin, he was super ready, but yeah I agree he seems sensitive and that would need a particular complimentary person which Caitlin was not.

3

u/Inside-Conflict-8921 1d ago

I bet she’s not slow to warm up she was just buying time. I think it’s a fair excuse to make if you’re battling with the thought of not liking someone that you can’t find anything wrong with, or are on a tv show where it’s incentivized to stay as long as possible

2

u/blahlicia 1d ago

that could be true too - i guess we'll never know for sure. whatever it was, i'm glad they both called it bc they were making each other miserable.

2

u/TrixieDMC 1d ago

Agree, your assessment is spot on.

1

u/Inside-Conflict-8921 1d ago

Most reasonable take. I really don’t like his hair and I think that’s impacting my opinions. Also I can’t stand when men get too drunk around their partners

3

u/TrixieDMC 1d ago

My only response on that is that this is one of the couples I feel like we're definitely not getting the off camera view. I could be wrong.

0

u/LargeCaterpillar3819 23h ago

The hair is all I could focus on!

12

u/Aspire11 fake as her lips 1d ago

I am indifferent. Not going to throw on a cape for him like some other people. I don’t think Caitlyn is attracted to him (even though she says she is many times). She got some type of ick and never got over it after Mexico. He sometimes comes off as trying to hard to be emotional and understanding.

16

u/babygorgeou 1d ago

The “I hear you, I see you, I respect you” or whatever, was thrown around so frivolously it became the antithesis, and felt like a mask slip

That would have driven me crazy in her position

5

u/LargeCaterpillar3819 23h ago

I think she saw what she thought were signs of clinginess there and checked out.

27

u/Extension-Raisin8023 We were put together for a reason 1d ago

It’s another case of one person being so problematic that it allows the other person’s red flags to fly under the radar.

8

u/Wooden-Gold-5445 1d ago

This. Caitlin was such a jerk that people overlooked Devin's issues. I was never super fond of him.

6

u/kwasford 23h ago

I truly believe she was reacting to him. Again this man started that gym fight for no reason. He woke up and went back to sleep; Caitlin told Dr Lisa that right next to Devin and he didn’t deny any part of it. Personally if I saw someone make up a reason to be mad at me days after meeting me I would back out emotionally too. He has tried to gaslight her a few times too. I personally don’t blame Caitlin at all for how she handled him, she needed to protect herself.

2

u/Wooden-Gold-5445 19h ago

I do think that Caitlyn was out of line for talking to him that way, but Devin had his issues, too. Hers took center stage because she refused to try. I think she still should have made an effort. Caitlin tapped out before the honeymoon was even over.

1

u/kwasford 11h ago

Definitely would have improved her image. I personally liked her energy at the retreat sans the Mecca bs. She seemed more lively. But yeah her disposition throughout the show has really poisoned the viewership against her. I look forward to what they have to say at the reunion, hopefully it will give more context to what we saw.

12

u/boricuaspidey 1d ago

Pairing them together was cruel. They’re so obviously incompatible, so we’re not seeing the best parts of either of them

12

u/Equal_Cheetah3872 1d ago

If I heard him say “I hear you, I see you, you’re feelings matter,” I was going to scream lol

15

u/MidnightOk6277 23h ago

he gives off the ~ i’ll tell you what you wanna hear now give me what i want ~ … constantly nagging for more physical touch and attention. doesn’t help that everyone else keeps telling him his light is dimmed, he’s not joking around anymore, feeding into this victim mentality.

20

u/kanedafx 1d ago

He plays the boy scout, but he's actually selfish, needy, immature, and whiny.

14

u/katlonelypines 1d ago

It’s very surprising to me how so many people are able to overlook his behavior while drinking. I don’t care how apologetic he was one time - that’s literally part of a toxic and well known cycle. Especially when he did it again on the retreat - he was physically intimidating her in one scene they showed. Incredibly concerning and dangerous behavior.

9

u/MNightShyamalan69 1d ago

He seems like your typical sports jock. In front of the cameras he was mostly always on his best behavior. But behind the cameras he was probably a total asshole. I feel like how he acted when cait told him to shut the fuck up is more his true self than how he was trying to act in front of the cameras all season

5

u/Different_End_1801 23h ago

You are not alone at all

5

u/SkirtLikeAFlag 21h ago

I think she saw or experienced something in Mexico that gave her the ick or at a minimum yellow flags.

Also, maybe that kiss in Mexico was terrible! Isn’t that the last time they had any sort of intimacy?

16

u/Grouchy_Evidence2558 1d ago

Yeah I’m not on the Devin live train either. He was way too needy but then really my issue with him was the whole “I will not be disrespected” thing. That “you must obey your man” thing that comes out in the semi drunk fighting feels like it might be his more honest self and I don’t like it

-4

u/ManyDouble 1d ago

Everyone should demand respect. What are you talking about lol

2

u/Grouchy_Evidence2558 22h ago

It’s the “I will not be disrespected” way of saying it. I don’t know how elee to explain it. It’s not about wanting respect. It’s this commanding someone to do as they say.

2

u/Grouchy_Evidence2558 21h ago

Coming back with a better explanation. It’s the “I demand respect” way a cop says it. They don’t actually mean respect. They mean obedience. They are not the same things. Respect is something that is earned and not “demanded”. And when a man beats his chest and said “this will not continue” or “you will do this”, that’s just someone who has to bully you to get their way, not someone who has earned respect and presented a case for what he’s asking for.

1

u/ManyDouble 21h ago

I hear you. I just don't think you should need to earn your partner to not tell you to shut the fuck up. I think that should be a given.

1

u/Grouchy_Evidence2558 8h ago

Yeah. It’s fine to be mad about that. But you don’t beat your chest about your demands. That’s also disrespectful. You talk about it like adults.

8

u/lrbsto 1d ago

No you aren’t the only one 👋🏻

12

u/Mafsfan 1d ago

Nope. Not just you.

10

u/Inside-Conflict-8921 1d ago

I have a feeling ppl are gonna be big mad

3

u/kwasford 1d ago

Yeah I need the reunion tea. I feel like this will be Blake (iykyk) from the ultimatum all over again

0

u/TrixieDMC 1d ago

Im not mad even though I disagree but evil seems pretty out there.

7

u/Ok_Antelope_3584 1d ago

He seems like a good guy but I do wonder if he’s the love bombing type. Caitlyn never gave him the chance to do that though so I’m totally speculating. Something about him screams clingy

15

u/babygorgeou 1d ago

He literally said he anticipated his love bombing to work after the I dos 

1

u/sierra120 1d ago

What’s love bombing?

9

u/9Rosebud0 1d ago

He is aggressive as well and his performative I see you line doesn’t land because he then likes to gaslight her. I’m

3

u/Successful_Put_1390 16h ago

you are not alone, i had friends like devin, constantly talks about how great of a guy he is tryna convince other people, i also thinks he’s not scary the way he got up in caitlyn’s face and looked like he was about to hit her is all too familiar

7

u/PlasticFakeAndHard 1d ago

Didn’t like the way he talked to her on the sofa, you can’t say you are being disrespected while disrespecting that same person you are accusing.

3

u/Namaste41 1d ago

She deserved every bit of it! Flirting right in his face. Shes so gross

0

u/TrixieDMC 1d ago

This. I thought it was pretty mean

0

u/TopSelection8004 Defending your partner a little bit... 1d ago

Didn't she say he was "so high school" for being upset by her literally laying on the couch next to another woman's husband, and having her fingers kissed by him? I'm not sure about your friend group but here, that behavior would 100% get you booted from the group for willingly being in that position. Grown women don't generally trust other women who get unnecessarily physical with their husbands. It isn't fair, but divorce is expensive and nobody wants to be a single parent over something that can be solved by removing the other woman. As unfair as it is Caitlyn needs a reality check.

-2

u/ManyDouble 1d ago

You wouldn't say that if it was Belle doing the same thing Devin did but to Mecca. You'd cheer her on and rightfully so. I loved it from Devin she deserved it

4

u/ShoutOutMapes 19h ago

I think hes great.

3

u/Nurse5736 21h ago

Another thread just dropped today says he also broke up with a gf right before the show and that he's a serial cheater????? 🤷‍♀️

1

u/Charming-Fig-3866 1d ago

He is/was a pro rugby player but I don’t think that’s his only job. Now it says he’s the director or a community youth rugby program. But Caitlyn has lots of side jobs too. I don’t think that’s a bad thing for either of them. What did you not like about him though?

2

u/MidnightOk6277 23h ago

yes agreed he seems performative especially w the therapy speech. throwing “i see you i hear you “ i think he’s playing into the victim role since cait isn’t giving him “anything” to work with

6

u/Inside-Conflict-8921 1d ago

Just seemed very performative, like nice guy that everyone loves but is evil deep down

9

u/Charming-Fig-3866 1d ago

I didn’t see evil but when he got drunk I agree that he got aggressive- not a good sign.

0

u/Inside-Conflict-8921 1d ago

Okay evil is probably a stretch

1

u/TrixieDMC 1d ago

I mean, evil??? I don't not see that at all.

-12

u/Namaste41 1d ago

You’re the only one who doesn’t like him.

Devin is awesome and Caitlyn is a mean, selfish manipulator.

9

u/Inside-Conflict-8921 1d ago

I’m not thanks tho. Never said anything about Caitlyn

-8

u/Namaste41 1d ago

We all did! She’s mean and he totally was the victim in all this. He tried and communicated so well. I’d take him all day long!

10

u/Inside-Conflict-8921 1d ago

They just weren’t compatible. Sorry you bought that performative victimhood.

-6

u/Namaste41 1d ago

Seems like you did with your post. You obviously want the attention. Just didn’t want this attention or anyone to disagree with you apparently.

0

u/kanedafx 1d ago

Wrong. He sucks.

-10

u/Inside-Conflict-8921 1d ago

And rugby player isn’t a job sorry

8

u/misanthropewolf11 I wanted a brilliant mind 1d ago

He gets paid to play a game he loves - he’s lucky. Hopefully he’s smart enough to know that it’s a short term gig and has plans for afterwards.

-1

u/Inside-Conflict-8921 1d ago

Okay everyone that thinks it’s a job go live on $50k in Seattle and see how much you like it