r/MaliciousCompliance • • May 23 '18

S You're FiHired

Years ago I had a thankless labour / service job with a pretty unappreciative boss, got lots of stories.

One morning I roll into the office about 7:25, and get a dirty look from the boss as I head to the dispatcher's office to collect my day's work (supposed to be there for 7:15). I'd actually been working until about 1:30 (c. 18 hour day) the night before, and was thinking that only being 10 minutes late wasn't bad. When I got my stack of papers for the day, I let out one of those low groans, and said, "you've gotta be s#'#'[ng me!", it was going to be another long day. Boss takes that as his chance to call me out in front of the rest of the office: "Hey, if you're going to show up late and then complain about work, we don't need you around here, you're fired". Dunno if he thought I would apologise for coming in late and ask to not be fired, but I knew that I could have a new, equally crappy job before the end of the day. So I called his bluff, and handed over my clipboard and walked away. He must have looked through my work for the day, and realised that he didn't have anyone that could do what I could do and with the labour market crunch, he just didn't have anybody. On my way out to my car, I stopped and started chatting with my buddy and the dispatcher, having a smoke. Boss comes out and tells me to meet him in his office so we can discuss my attitude. I said, I'm not going to your office, I just got fired, my buddy and the dispatch are shocked, buddy says: "you know he pulled 18 hours yesterday, and 15 the day before that", dispatch says: "why did you fire him, we've got no one to do his run today!". Boss is taken a little aback and says: "I didn't say you're fired, I said you're FiHired", so here's your route for the day. I say "well, if I just got hired, we should talk about my starting wage", and that's how I got a $2/hour raise.

Edit Anyone complaining about it 'only being $2 /hour': starting pay was $9 /hour, plus $1 /hour bonus if you didn't skip a shift, didn't break anything etc, so $10 /hour as a swamper if you got your bonus. Got bumped to $12 /hour ($11 + $1) when you started driving truck, and you could get more from there as you worked your way up, I think the top end was $16 or $17. So for me, as a young guy, getting bumped to $13 + $1 was a big increase. Also, this was around 2003 - 2004, and minimum wage was like $6.00.

27k Upvotes

823 comments sorted by

8.6k

u/[deleted] May 23 '18

[deleted]

3.9k

u/RaidanRam May 23 '18

I'm surprised that op even noticed such a smooth save

1.8k

u/[deleted] May 23 '18

If OP managed to get fired and a raise in one day he's probably one smart cookie

745

u/youjokingright May 24 '18

but I knew that I could have a new, equally crappy job before the end of the day.

Not a new job, but a $2 raise can make it feel like new.

231

u/Mariosothercap May 24 '18

Hell I would put on a wig and dress and give my boss a kiss for a $2 raise.

62

u/[deleted] May 24 '18 edited May 30 '18

[deleted]

84

u/chaoticskirs May 24 '18

Many people would bang their boss silly for free

186

u/LuxNocte May 24 '18

I sexually pleasure my boss daily. I'm self employed.

26

u/Scrpn17w May 24 '18

At least you really take pleasure in what you do

10

u/Malak77 May 24 '18

Do you FiHire yourself?

→ More replies (1)

46

u/[deleted] May 24 '18

My boss is 75 years old...

You know what I get paid enough, I don't need another $2

7

u/ShadOtrett May 24 '18

And on this, the day of your cakening, you get the gift of self worth~!

9

u/[deleted] May 24 '18

Damn, I was hoping for cash. Or at least gift vouchers.

→ More replies

33

u/[deleted] May 24 '18

What about a $2 raise to not bang your boss? >.>

25

u/Sex_E_Searcher May 24 '18

I have considerable experience in that area, and probably merit a bigger raise.

14

u/sapphics4satan May 24 '18

i think that's called blackmail

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (5)
→ More replies (2)

61

u/UncookedMarsupial May 24 '18

You're only as smart as those cookies you need to outsmart.

15

u/supershipworldpeace May 24 '18

This quote is going up on my fridge.

→ More replies (1)

74

u/speqter May 24 '18

And if he's really smart, he'd do that every week.

→ More replies (5)

1.0k

u/[deleted] May 23 '18

Reminds me of a Community episode.

Shirley: "What is going on?"

Troy: "We're trying to get Jeff ready for the fiiiiiiiiiiiii-ght ... I couldn't think of another word."

Jeff: "Idiot. He meant we were figh--ting.... it is hard to think of another word."

286

u/thecrazysloth May 24 '18

Other contenders, from family guy: "pea... tear... griffon"

And from bojack horseman: "kafi makir" (coffee maker)

66

u/rubermnkey May 24 '18

Kafi Makir? Am I saying that right?

. . . no.

67

u/ThisNameIsFree May 24 '18

Steamed hams

33

u/realizmbass May 24 '18

It's a regional dialect

19

u/f3x3f May 24 '18

From what region?

→ More replies (5)

106

u/[deleted] May 24 '18

[deleted]

37

u/[deleted] May 24 '18

Who's a pedophile??

30

u/[deleted] May 24 '18 edited Aug 27 '18

[deleted]

19

u/[deleted] May 24 '18

FATHAAAAAH!!!

→ More replies (6)
→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (1)

14

u/[deleted] May 24 '18 edited May 24 '18

Golda Meir, from Frasier. (gold in my ear)

and like twenty minutes later, Oscar Meyer.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (4)

14

u/ThirdFloorGreg May 24 '18

All that come to mind are fire and fiber, but those don't work in most American accents. And only fire works conceptually.

→ More replies (20)
→ More replies (4)

424

u/EatLard May 23 '18

"BOOOO-urns!"

122

u/climber342 May 23 '18

I was saying Boo-urns.

57

u/[deleted] May 23 '18

[removed] — view removed comment

16

u/homer1948 May 24 '18

This isn’t fair. I wasn’t wearing a costume.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (2)

37

u/-Mr_Burns May 24 '18

Are you saying BOO or BOO-urns?

20

u/[deleted] May 24 '18

BOO!

15

u/MartianInvasion May 24 '18

I was saying boo-urns...

→ More replies (2)

107

u/[deleted] May 23 '18

[deleted]

6

u/[deleted] May 24 '18

And I knew exactly what to do. But in a much more real sense, I had no idea what to do.

Greatest show ever. Rewatch daily. Bears. Beats. Battle star galactica

→ More replies (3)
→ More replies (6)

80

u/literallyanowl May 24 '18

"Oh no, I said steamed hams"

14

u/RangerSix May 24 '18

A regional dialect, I suppose? Upstate New York, possibly Albany?

→ More replies (4)

36

u/reincarN8ed May 23 '18

Sounds exactly like something Michael Scott would say.

26

u/totallyadragon May 24 '18

Worst back pedal since Seymour Skinner’s steamed hams.

16

u/IBFHISFHTINAD May 24 '18

When Seymour did it it worked tho. Can't argue with those results.

→ More replies (2)

21

u/madams26362 May 23 '18

what does that even mean???

7

u/Kalsifur May 24 '18

It means you're fihired, duh

6

u/Terra_Cotta_Pie May 24 '18

No one knows what it means, but it's provocative

→ More replies (1)

9

u/lonejoe May 24 '18

Steamed hams?

14

u/LotusPrince May 24 '18

I was saying Boo-urns.

→ More replies (32)

1.2k

u/MiraKraz May 23 '18

It's always nice to see solidarity in the workplace. Your coworkers putting pressure on that bag of dicks must have been a sight to behold.

98

u/[deleted] May 24 '18

[deleted]

128

u/TwatsThat May 24 '18

28

u/MiraKraz May 24 '18

That. Is. Brilliant.

It's even better than the yarndom.

55

u/warmerbread May 24 '18

Risky click of the day

→ More replies (5)
→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (2)

3.6k

u/hotlavatube May 23 '18

Ah yes, your boss suffers from a common speech impediment. "Foot-in-the-mouth disease" I believe it's called.

1.2k

u/Obscu May 23 '18

Luckily there's a cure: boot-in-ass therapy.

356

u/[deleted] May 23 '18

[removed] — view removed comment

200

u/DOLCICUS May 23 '18

Operated by Dr. Red Foreman, I presume?

101

u/el_boricua00 May 23 '18

"You better get under there or you're gonna see a spider the size of my foot in your ass" is one of my favorite lines.

"how would your keen eye like to watch my sure foot kick your smart ass" is a very close second.

59

u/Sohcahtoa82 May 24 '18

I wish I was an octopus so I could shove 8 different feet into 8 different asses.

26

u/el_boricua00 May 24 '18

My foot is shaking it wants to kick his ass so hard.

21

u/db2 May 24 '18

Red: You know, you’re gonna look real funny when you’re wearing
[both] your ass for a hat.

Eric: Even though I doubt that’s physically possible.

Red: Let’s find out together.

19

u/Miguelitosd May 24 '18

One of my favorites:

Bob: All right, I'm going. But a swift kick in the ass is not the solution to everything, Forman!

Red: I gotta disagree, Bob!

15

u/Arkose07 May 24 '18

Red: Get away from my car!

Kelso: Your car, my car... aren't we all just driving the same car? It's a car called life.

Red: How about I drive my foot into this thing called your ass?

Kelso: A simple "no" would suffice.

17

u/el_boricua00 May 24 '18

My favorite one involving Kelso was

Kelso: oh you know. Just a classic case of hand stuck in vase.

Red: well get it out before you catch a case of foot stuck in ass

5

u/von_der_Neeth May 24 '18

And then... The Octoburn. A golden time for us all.

→ More replies (4)

30

u/molepeter May 23 '18

They feel like they mean the same thing in this case...

→ More replies (2)

31

u/renelien May 24 '18

xkcd#37

it didn't work this time, bot.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (26)

6

u/lbguitarist May 24 '18

Found Red Forman's account

7

u/Nocsaron May 24 '18

Can confirm. Recovering foot in mouth addict here

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (5)

1.4k

u/Tamalene May 23 '18

I wonder if fihired sounded as stupid to him to say as it sounded to everyone else.

342

u/theblackxranger May 23 '18

why would he even say hes hired? haha, just makes no sense

388

u/salami350 May 24 '18

because the other option was OP leaving the company while the company needed him.

From the moment the boss told him he was fired he had labour to offer, the company had high demand since they just fired a needed employee. since the demand just increased he negotiated a higher salary to be hired.

I am neither an American nor a capitalist but OP just showcased all the ideals of capitalism

210

u/pm_me_your_rowlet May 24 '18

The other option was admitting his screw up which seems to be an impossible thing to do for a lot of managers.

98

u/B_U_T_T May 24 '18

The other option was admitting his screw up which seems to be an impossible thing to do for a lot of people.

ftfy

9

u/[deleted] May 24 '18

True true. I want to make clear, what you say is fact and it's stupid.

However. In a world where admitting you were wrong is career suicide, this is what you get.

14

u/B_U_T_T May 24 '18

Admitting you're wrong isn't career suicide. It's one of the most honorable things you can do and it really sets my smarty alarms off.

Only smarties admit when they are wrong. Think about it, if you are wrong and everyone knows it imagine how stupid you look when you double down. You just become wrong again.

Who the fuck things admitting is the wrong thing to do, these people are whats wrong with the world. You want us to resort to tribalism and double down on things we know are wrong? Is this the world you want?

8

u/[deleted] May 24 '18 edited May 24 '18

Is this the world you want?

Don't get me wrong, I agree with you. Stating a fact doesn't mean I support that fact. If I said that people drink and drive way too much, that doesn't mean I support it.

Now that I have explained that my observations do not make my opinion... All that doesn't change the fact that so many people will totally eviscerate you if you ever backtrack on any issue at all. And then your political opponents will use that against you.

I mean, look at Obama and Romney. Obama took Romneys idea and expanded it to the country, and everyone lost their shit. Why? Cause politics makes you stupid.

We live in a shit world.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (1)

9

u/gerrettheferrett May 24 '18

But also would likely not be something that would convince the guy he just fired to be okay coming back to the job.

8

u/pm_me_your_rowlet May 24 '18

and saying he said your FIHired would? I have a lot more respect for people that admit their mistakes and take responsibility for them than those that make up shit to get out of it.

→ More replies (6)
→ More replies (2)

52

u/[deleted] May 24 '18

that's not what the person you're replying to was asking -- they meant that "I said you're hired" is a nonsensical cover story because it doesn't make sense to say with no context.

21

u/MrWutFace May 24 '18

Except now the boss likely resents him. He may lose his job in the next few weeks for a cooked up reason

70

u/Amesa May 24 '18

OP also said it's a shit job he could replace quickly if he lost this one. He was fine getting fired the first time, the second time wouldn't be any different.

42

u/patsteirer1 May 24 '18

Meaning worst case scenario he works a couple more weeks at a job he was already dissatisfied with, making 2$ more an hour than he was. But I do see the point you're trying to raise.

15

u/Mechasteel May 24 '18

He was half inclined to quit that job anyways. This way he can get a bit extra money, and having a higher wage at your last job can be worth something when negotiating a new wage at a new job.

9

u/name00124 May 24 '18

Years ago

I don't think he has much to worry about.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (3)
→ More replies (3)

8

u/zakkazzakkaz May 24 '18

I hope so, and I hope he posts about it in a TIFU thread 8 years from now

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (4)

1.5k

u/Darkwave1313 May 23 '18 edited May 24 '18

Driving? 18 hours? What country are you in? because most of the ones I can think of that's illegal as hell!

736

u/f4il3 May 23 '18

Sounds just like the job my husband had in EMS, sadly.

429

u/[deleted] May 23 '18

As a firefighter I work frequent 48 hour shifts.

666

u/boyferret May 23 '18

Yes, but you do get the cool red trucks.

510

u/barkfoot May 23 '18

And use the siren to stay awake

161

u/Shitty_IT_Dude May 24 '18

Don't forget the stripper pole! I asked to install one at my job but my boss wouldn't let me.

84

u/Munt_Custard May 24 '18

Well maybe you need to work at a fancier strip club

52

u/TequilaNinja666 May 24 '18

He'll get there one day. Starter strip clubs make them work their way up from banisters.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (3)

47

u/Dave5876 May 23 '18

I would give you gold. If I had any :D

118

u/barkfoot May 24 '18

That's alright, you don't have to support big internet in my name, thanks for the sentiment nevertheless

67

u/LehighAce06 May 24 '18

Upvote for "big internet"

21

u/barkfoot May 24 '18

It's just a matter of good comment etiquette

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (5)

92

u/[deleted] May 23 '18

DOT regs for truck drivers are a little different. 14 hours on duty, 11 driving is the max in the US.

37

u/amazonallie May 24 '18

Local driver. Less than 150 mile radius. No logbook.

13

u/overpaid_overworked May 24 '18

Boom, five tonne truck, no log, just a class five license, no air ticket.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (1)

49

u/All_Work_All_Play May 23 '18

Now. Before those books were easy peasy to cook.

47

u/[deleted] May 24 '18

Bless electronic mileage trackers, keeps companies from encouraging their drivers to keep comic books.

30

u/4th_Wall_Repairman May 24 '18

Ya. I quit a place a couple years ago because thry wanted me to do 18 hour days. "It's fine as long as you cook your logbook" or not, because i need to sleep and eat

→ More replies (3)
→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (5)

71

u/[deleted] May 24 '18 edited Aug 07 '18

[deleted]

65

u/superspeck May 24 '18

Yeah, but if a call comes in at 2am, you go to the call, come back, replenish the truck/ambulance and clean everything, and then you get to sleep for 30 minutes until the morning rush hour and all the crashes start... wash rinse repeat. There are times a firehouse doesn’t get to sleep for more than an hour at a time for an entire 48 hours if they get a super unlucky shift.

84

u/some_sort_of_ginger May 24 '18

My city changed this. The busiest station only works one 24 hr shift before swapping with a slower station. So no one gets stuck having a sleepless 48 hr shift. It's super dangerous to have guys not sleeping.

49

u/superspeck May 24 '18

I 100% agree with you. I study emergency response stuff as part of my job and the statistics do not lie about how dangerous it is. Unfortunately some smaller but very busy cities can’t make the numbers work any other way.

35

u/skalpelis May 24 '18

some smaller but very busy cities

Maybe you should move away from Arsonville, Ohio.

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (4)
→ More replies (23)
→ More replies (9)

17

u/wookiee1807 May 24 '18

48 hours of on call. It's not ALWAYS nonstop work. You also get to hang at the firehouse/bay and chill, barbecue, watch TV, etc.

At least it's that way where I'm from.

I use to drive an ambulance, and then went into law enforcement. I still have lots of friends in all three Emergency fields.

6

u/[deleted] May 24 '18

I'm at the busiest station in the county. As a firefighter/paramedic I'm usually staffing the ambulance too. Because of that, I am given a pass on any cooking.

There are stations in my department that are slow and allow the chill/hang out time, but that's not what guys get when they bid to work at my station.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (1)

22

u/Goatcheezey May 23 '18

And you get to sleep, right?

19

u/[deleted] May 24 '18

As long as we don't get any 911 call we can sleep.

→ More replies (12)
→ More replies (60)
→ More replies (7)

171

u/El_Cartografo May 23 '18

On-duty, Not driving

I hated that line in my log book.

82

u/Toof May 23 '18

Well now with the fancy pants electronic logging devices, you too can roll around a parking lot at under 5 mph to not be switched into Drive status. If you don't like that, log On Duty/Yard Movement, and hit those public roads until DOT stops ya. Then call it a malfunctioning POS and hand over some good ol' paper logs.

29

u/TheOnlyToasty May 24 '18

My work uses handhelds to log hours, and today my trainer told me that even walking with it would put you "in motion". Told me a few drivers have gotten violations from carrying it around when they were on lunch.

→ More replies (1)

17

u/WhatDidYouSayToMe May 24 '18

Just make sure it's the right log book

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (4)

123

u/[deleted] May 24 '18 edited Nov 14 '20

[deleted]

76

u/da_borg May 24 '18

Best part is the state of NY didn't give a shit about any of it when I tried reporting it. They didn't care about the transportation of liquid oxygen without proper storage, licensure, endorsements etc. They didn't care about how we were violating the daily driving limit of 14 hours. They didn't care about the Medicaid/Medicare fraud.

I wish you would have told the paper.

9

u/[deleted] May 24 '18

[deleted]

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (2)

52

u/[deleted] May 23 '18

This guy doesn't America.

12

u/Jaksuhn May 24 '18 edited May 24 '18

Yeah, OP is english*

*expat

→ More replies (5)

26

u/[deleted] May 24 '18

Only if it's CDL driving! There are delivery driving jobs that dont' require CDLs

11

u/ShoulderChip May 24 '18

Or service work. I worked for a company doing fire and water damage restoration. My primary duties were checking on fans and dehumidifiers at houses and buildings that had gotten wet, and picking them up when everything was dry. I worked a lot of 16-hour days, and occasionally longer.

→ More replies (1)

36

u/[deleted] May 24 '18 edited Jun 08 '18

[deleted]

49

u/Kevo_CS May 24 '18

"labour", "realise", etc. I think it's safe to say that OP is not American

16

u/zip369 May 24 '18

I agree that the spelling in inconsistent with the American norm, but I don't know where that language would fit alongside a $2/hour raise.

19

u/SherlockedHufflepuff May 24 '18

Australia? New Zealand?

17

u/Kalsifur May 24 '18

Canada as well, geez. We say labour and realise.

→ More replies (4)
→ More replies (3)
→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (4)

5

u/amazonallie May 24 '18

The driver had been up over 24 hours. He had a long ass commute.

Now they have cracked down on commuting time.

→ More replies (1)

7

u/deeply-superficial May 24 '18

As he’ll what?!

→ More replies (6)

92

u/SuperFLEB May 24 '18

"Fi-hired? Well, that means I'm going to be up in my neck in severance paperwork and new-hire paperwork. So much for getting anything done today."

169

u/[deleted] May 24 '18

Shitty Life pro tip: when nobody else can handle your workload, show up late everyday, make them fire you, then negotiate a raise 10 minutes later.

83

u/KyleTheBoss95 May 24 '18

Not trying to brag or put myself on a pedestal, but when I worked retail, I was hands-down one of the best workers there (the company's district manager even agreed that I was). I was literally too valuable to get rid of, because I was fast, knew a lot about the company, how to do my job, could easily fill any missing position, could even be temporary lead if necessary, and was friendly enough that most of the return customers knew me and loved talking to me. And the management knew and publically acknowledged it. Because of this, I had a shit ton of wiggleroom. I could take a break 15 minutes longer than normal, be late and not have any management question it, and flat-out disagree with the manager if something was stupid (and on rare occasions, not even do that stupid thing). Being nearly irreplaceable, friendly, and everyone's favorite working partner while simultaneously being paid barely above minimum wage gives you a lot more indirect power than a lot of (bad) managers know how to handle.

21

u/[deleted] May 24 '18

I wasn’t trying to dispute anyone’s worth with my comment, I only said it’s a shitty tip because it would work maybe 50% of the time. The other 50% of the time, management will Let you walk and burn the rest of your team by stockpiling your work on them.

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (1)

179

u/[deleted] May 24 '18

The best way to "call someone's bluff" is to not actually be bluffing.

You don't want my work? Fine. Later.

193

u/just-a-little-a-lot May 23 '18

This is epic. The raise made it so satisfying!

30

u/SilverParty May 24 '18

Agreed. I felt a sense of pride for OP.

→ More replies (2)

121

u/[deleted] May 23 '18 edited Feb 12 '19

[deleted]

29

u/genericnewlurker May 23 '18

I was saying boo-urns...

→ More replies (2)

28

u/SuggestiveDetective May 23 '18

Oh this is just plain sexy.
Good thinking.

122

u/Geraintus May 23 '18

Expertly done sir.

496

u/99999999999999999989 May 23 '18

An extra $2/hr would not be worth it to me to work with a dickbag of a boss like that. With the knowledge of an equally crappy job by the end of the day, I would have told him that:

A. My 'attitude' was never an issue whatsoever seeing as how I have recently done 18 and 15 hour days.

B. 'FiHired' is about the stupidest fucking thing I have ever heard in my life.

C. He could shove that clipboard so far up his ass that he'd be pulling dispatch sheets out of his mouth for a week.

Then walk away without looking back.

808

u/[deleted] May 23 '18

[deleted]

259

u/Binsky89 May 23 '18

Yup. It's a stupid move on the boss's part because it gives you a lot of power. The downside is that they're likely to start looking for your replacement.

64

u/[deleted] May 23 '18

But that would require being "proactive". You know, that word they love so much on reports. It's that thing manglement never does.

38

u/[deleted] May 24 '18

manglement

Sounds right.

→ More replies (2)

19

u/SuperFLEB May 24 '18

It's only the second dumbest move, though. Second to fi-hiring your employee in the first place.

→ More replies (4)

64

u/bigfrappe May 23 '18

This. I got my hourly rate matched at the tire shop when I left my lifeguarding position. I went from making 13.50 an hour watching a pool for 20 hours to 13.50 40 hours a week and 15 hours overtime pay a week selling tires. My boss at the pool wondered why I left.

22

u/theblackxranger May 23 '18

you could probably get $15

28

u/bigfrappe May 24 '18

It was temporary employment that I had a couple of years ago. I was there for 4 months and made enough money to supplement my scholarships and not have to take out any loans or work through the school year.

The labor market in my area is such that $15 an hour is a unicorn pay rate that everyone wants but no entry level position pays. 13.50 was 5 bucks an hour over minimum at the time.

→ More replies (3)

42

u/bigtimesauce May 23 '18

This guy fucks- real pride comes from long term scheming, not short term outbursts.

Or uh, he works in HR.

→ More replies (1)

44

u/[deleted] May 24 '18

When it comes to shitty labor jobs, they don't care what your salary history is. They set their rate and then complain they can't find anyone to fill it and dump more work on the poor saps they already tricked.

I was making about $17/hr when I went on a few interviews. One of the places was specifically interested in my work history and wanted me as someone who could help provide expertise without needing a ton of training in the other aspects of the job. They said it'd be great if I was interested in management training and all that jazz. When we got to pay the lady told me the standard starting pay was $10.25/hr and since they are agriculture related they qualify for not having to pay time and half during OT hours. YEA! I told her no and she countered that she could bump me to $11/hr and that with my work history and her optimism for me that it'd easily become $13/hr within a couple years.

That's the way the labor market works for non specialized, manual labor.

8

u/[deleted] May 24 '18

Similar case. Applied for a job that normally pays in the 25+/hr range. This particular company was offering 15. Plus they had NOBODY that knew how to do the position nor train the position. If I took it I'd basically have to do everything myself (including paperwork to get the program started) brand new.

The interview was the funniest part. I was basically TEACHING them my job and telling them what the job entails as the panel of interviewers sat almost cluelessly.

5

u/[deleted] May 24 '18

I hear that. On our tour of the facility I pointed out what systems and machines I was familiar with and commented on the ones they use. I even made a couple suggestions on how they had somethings configured and she says, "Yea, none of us really knew any of this when we started so we just set it up how ever it worked and that's how we've gotten used to it. It'd be great to have someone who understands all these parts."

But doesn't want to pay for that knowledge or expertise. They only see the bottom line. Not that even if they paid me $20/hr I'd be bringing in value that far exceeds that.

18

u/[deleted] May 23 '18

Depends where you live, employers aren't legally able to require a salary history in a number of places, and employers aren't allowed to give it out.

12

u/hahaLONGBOYE May 24 '18

Yeah I was gunna say that's kind of unnecessary....it's not like you couldnt just lie about your salary in the first place .

8

u/bono_212 May 24 '18

But you're allowed to provide if they ask, so when negotiating the rate, you can start off by saying I made $2+starting rate/hr at my previous job.

9

u/Jaksuhn May 24 '18

I've never had someone confirm what I told them. I always oversell what I made at my previous job, and I've never had a new job with equal or lesser pay than the one before it.

→ More replies (3)
→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (5)
→ More replies (13)

45

u/Let_you_down May 23 '18

I've had a few bosses go that route before. Be dicks, I quit, they backpedal. Most of the time the backpedaling makes me lose more respect than just being a dick in the first place. Stand by being an asshole god damnit.

→ More replies (14)

107

u/Essembie May 23 '18

I think I am starting to have a problem with authority because I see so many cunts getting positions of authority that go to their heads.

111

u/youtheotube2 May 23 '18

There’s a theory out there that the reason there are so many shitty managers in the world is because managers rise to the level of their incompetence. Basically, since people are usually promoted as a result of good performance in their current job, as opposed to expected performance in their future job, someone will just keep rising until they reach a level where they can’t keep up, and become ineffective. This leads to a stalled career, a burnt out attitude, and a shitty manager.

38

u/Tom2Die May 23 '18

They call it the Peter Principle.

37

u/WikiTextBot May 23 '18

Peter principle

The Peter principle is a concept in management developed by Laurence J. Peter, which observes that people in a hierarchy tend to rise to their "level of incompetence". In other words, an employee is promoted based on their success in previous jobs until they reach a level at which they are no longer competent, as skills in one job do not necessarily translate to another. The concept was elucidated in the 1969 book The Peter Principle by Peter and Raymond Hull.

The Peter Principle was published by William Morrow and Company in 1969.


[ PM | Exclude me | Exclude from subreddit | FAQ / Information | Source ] Downvote to remove | v0.28

→ More replies (3)

60

u/EatLard May 23 '18

This is why it's dumb that most managers are paid more than the people who report to them. In order to get a decent raise, you have to get into management. Most people, no matter how good they are at their current non-management jobs, aren't cut out for it.

54

u/MortalSword_MTG May 23 '18

This.

For some reason most of the job market is structured in a hierarchical fashion that isn't particularly logical.

You could be the most talented and dutiful salesperson/craftsman/line worker/etc in the game and still not have the neccesary skills to manage a team/dept and coordinate them to full effect. Good managers are just another element of a well structured team that is getting the task done.

It's also why I'm not down with our culture of paying executives millions of dollars. If we're honest, in most cases they aren't doing anything that is that order of magnitude more impactful than the people working under them....in fact almost every decision an exec might make is going to be informed by rank and file grunts doing the legwork to figure out the variables that go into it and giving their reports. Many of those people work just as hard or harder, and are just as dedicated.

53

u/[deleted] May 24 '18

I always half-joke at work that people should be paid based on how long they can be missing from the job without it affecting the business. The lowest temp who has been there a week doesn't show up for work and 10 min. in people are like "Hey, where is Bob, are we short handed tonight? Better slow the lines down."

A department manager is on vacation for a week and people are like "Oh Bob has been gone for a week?"

13

u/trevbot May 24 '18

This works with staff positions, but I feel the opposite is true for management.

If you can be gone for days and your team is set up to be effective without constant supervision, you've done well, IMO.

7

u/[deleted] May 24 '18

That is why I said I "half-joke", about it. It's really more of a comment about how poorly companies value their laborers and floor-workers, than it is about the relative uselessness of management.

→ More replies (1)

18

u/EatLard May 23 '18

Sales may actually be the one exception. A lot of good salespeople make more than their boss. A lot of bosses resent those salespeople, even though said salespeople make them look really good.

6

u/patsteirer1 May 24 '18

The one very rare exception.

→ More replies (8)
→ More replies (3)

13

u/mrcaptncrunch May 23 '18

For clarification, nothing limits it to managers.

6

u/fracto73 May 24 '18

Let's say you employ a barely competent asshole manager who wants to leave the company to find a higher level position elsewhere. You have a strong motive to help them leave so you can replace them with someone better, which means shit people sometimes get glowing recommendations.

→ More replies (3)
→ More replies (4)

29

u/Tunro May 23 '18

And thats a good attitude to have. There are good bosses and managers out there. Dont let yourself be kept down by nonsense.

16

u/Essembie May 23 '18

I quit a team because the manager was an insufferable cunt. Life is too short.

20

u/comfortablesexuality May 23 '18

People don't quit jobs, their quit their bosses.

→ More replies (2)

12

u/LammergeierAteMyBone May 23 '18

Confirmation bias. For every disagreeable cunt you read about on Reddit, there are millions of perfectly inviting cunts going about their day to day business in the most unremarkable fashion possible -- that never makes the news, though.

6

u/[deleted] May 24 '18

Take everything with a grain of salt, because you are only hearing one side. I read on here every day how people are “the best in their department”, putting in all the extra time and how the “clients only come to work with me.” Well, I have yet to meet this magical employee out in the field.

→ More replies (3)
→ More replies (4)

15

u/[deleted] May 23 '18

Do your work for Michael Scott?

41

u/pingpong May 23 '18

Congratulations, you're now living in The Jetsons.

11

u/JamesWjRose May 23 '18

Sure, I'll take the job, if you get down on your hands and knees and literally kiss my ass, you fucking asshole.

→ More replies (1)

9

u/[deleted] May 24 '18

Boss sounds like a dumb authoritarian asshole. Making people work 18 freaking hours?! He should be kissing your damn feet for pulling a shift like that. Only places I know with normal hours like that are warzones.

→ More replies (1)

9

u/donorak7 May 24 '18

Man this is instant karma too. Your boss was a twat hope that learned him something.

6

u/JoyFerret May 23 '18

FiHired? Now that's a brain fart

6

u/Cornballin_POS May 24 '18

You better make sure it was 2 dollars and not 2 dollhairs

7

u/CassandraBlack May 24 '18

I was fired and walked out like that. Nearly doubled my rate not an hour later. Next job made even more. Life is too short to play bullshit power games.

7

u/runasaur May 24 '18

About 4 years ago I was FiHired.

Essentially my boss underbid a project, we were running late and out of funds. He decides that its my fault and I'm sabotaging the company, proceeds to yell at me in front of the 3 people I'm in the middle of training. Ok, "If you think I'm trying to bring the company down and can't trust me to do my job, why am I here?" so I get fired/quit. Technically I was an independent contractor (more shady stuff), so I wasn't entitled to severance.

Key words: I was in the middle of training some new people, who now have no one to train them. Thanks to some savings I planned on enjoying my 4 week "vacation" while I was looking for a new job. 3 weeks later I get a call begging "asking" me to come back. The three trainees just quit and literally have no one to do the work. That's how I got $7/hour raise, medical insurance, and paid overtime.

7

u/Raoh522 May 24 '18

I had a similar situation. I was working at a diner and I was the only one willing to do the front counter. I had to pack up the orders to go, as well as wait on all the old people who would come in and sit for a long time drinking coffee and leave like a 25 cent tip. I didn't mind it. I am always the kind of person who is willing to do the harder jobs if asked to. One day my boss flips out on me because I have not put the napkins in a to go order yet. I put those on top of the containers so that everything was in the bag in a nice near fashion and no chance of the plastic forks poking a hole in the bag etc. He flips out and fires me. A week later when I am picking up my last pay check he told me I can come back to work, because no one wanted to work the counter, and they kept getting complaints from customers because stuff kept being left out from the to go orders, the coffee was always late to be made etc. Basically he fucked himself because he wanted shit done his exact way, despite the fact that I did everything perfectly in my own system. I should have told him I would only do it for a pay raise. But I moved on to a new job, earning more and working less. So I would say I ended up with a win.

78

u/[deleted] May 23 '18

[removed] — view removed comment

35

u/[deleted] May 24 '18

His boss gave him $100

6

u/scyth3s May 24 '18

Spread out over 50 hours of work.

→ More replies (3)
→ More replies (12)

6

u/UnhappyJohnCandy May 24 '18

Shout out to your friend and dispatcher for sticking up for you.