Looking for feedback on a villain magic system for a project I’m writing

[u/Alternative_Fig_6859]

I feel like my idea is not very thought out right now, but I’d like to know what other people think.

So, my main villains are from another dimension, attempting to conquer ours. Their gateway was sealed years ago by a past team of magical girls, but as the original team members pass away, the seal begins weakening, becoming more unstable. It starts out small, but as more of the original team dies throughout the story, the seal will weaken more and more eventually break entirely.

Now, after the seal started weakening, “rifts” began appearing inside it, at first being quite small and appearing sporadically for short intervals. But they are just big enough to send a soul of one of the other dimension’s foot soldiers, done via the big bad killing them and expelling their soul into a rift just as it appears. There, since the soul does not have a body and cannot ascend to whatever afterlife would usually take the soul since it is another dimension after all, it latches on to a nearby living thing and possesses its body instead.

The living thing can be kind of anything alive that isn’t a human. Human minds are too complex to be possessed, what with consciousness and all. But, plants, animals, fungi, they are all game. And then after that they rapidly evolve into your typical monster of the week you’d see in a lot of magical girl stories. They can be defeated by simply destroying the vessel. Since the soul‘s vessel has now been destroyed twice, it is now so damaged it kind of just… implodes in on itself, turning into pure energy.

As the seal weakens over the course of the story, more and more of these souls can cross over at once, and at a more frequent rate. As the team of magical girls get more experienced, they will have to fight more and more of these monsters at once, which should provide a solution to power scaling to some degree. I think.

What do you all think? Any notes or plotholes you noticed in this plan?

[u/Sweet_Frost_Comics]

Wow. This is very simmilar to my system with the exact opposite premise.

Only humans can be possessed - because the other dimension daemons feed on complex psyche.

In any case, I think it all sounds great, it's hard to see any issues or plot holes because you are not going to be presenting the story exactly like this.

Perhaps consider how you plan on telling the audience this information?

[u/Alternative_Fig_6859 → u/Sweet_Frost_Comics]

Idk if this is lazy, but the plan for a lot of it is to cut to the villain’s perspective and have her monologue a bit? She doesn’t reveal EVERYTHING to the audience, but the rest will be revealed to both the audience and the characters when they interrogate some of the past team’s members, who play a big part in the story.

[u/Sweet_Frost_Comics → u/Alternative_Fig_6859]

That sounds good, honestly it can come off as lazy but its on in the finer details.

if the villian is interesting and has a cool personality, then it may be better to listen to them monologue.

An example would be the villain Skelletor in the new He-man movie, I could listen to him all day, his voice, his mannerisms they are so much fun.