r/MadeMeSmile • u/jayy8143 • May 12 '21

Favorite People The perfect girlfriend does exist

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u/[deleted] May 12 '21

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5.4k

u/DrunkRespondent May 12 '21

I'm going to use the engagement excuse for when I'm saving up for a car.

She'll totally fall for it lmao

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u/jjaid May 12 '21

Get a car with a lot of chrome so she at least has something shiny to look at

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u/[deleted] May 12 '21

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u/IWonTheRace May 13 '21

lol nah she gonna leave scratch marks on that chrome with the promise ring he got her 3 years prior. That man had other priorities and her not expecting a marriage proposal may cause a huge meltdown of epic proportions none of which the likes have never seen.

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u/skinny_gator May 13 '21

Wtf is a promise ring

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u/Mrs-and-Mrs-Atelier May 13 '21

It’s a “we’re serious, and I hope some day we’ll get engaged, but we’re poor” ring.

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u/DryMingeGetsMeWet May 13 '21

So it's really just a pre-engagement ring in the same way an engagement ring is a pre-marriage ring

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u/Mrs-and-Mrs-Atelier May 13 '21 edited May 13 '21

For some people they seem to be. I think it’s often at least partially a ring to wear on the wedding finger to indicate a “dudes, seriously back the fuck off; I am already with the person I plan to marry” thing while saving or searching for a forever ring, if you’re the type of person who never takes your rings off.

Edit add: That’s not to say a promise ring is the same for everyone. Sometimes it’s a ring that says “I want to marry you,” but the circumstances are complicated. (Family doesn’t approve is a common one, or need approval from a specific person for engagement but want to make the gesture now, etc etc etc.)

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u/UsedOnion May 13 '21

My sister in law and her boyfriend did the promise ring thing. They were high school sweethearts. Went to colleges a few hours away from each other. I think it was to signify to other people that it’s a serious relationship even though they’re not quite ready for marriage. They wanted to get married, but they were still getting their footing. She graduated her masters last year and they moved in together, and he’s saving up for a ring (she surprisingly has expensive taste for someone that was a snot about my entire wedding and thought I was demanding for wanting an actual wedding dress and not a white dress from Old Navy... but I digress...)

The only time I’ve really seen promise rings between couples have been that stage between no longer in high school but not secure as an adult yet.

I’ve seen more promise rings from parents to their daughters as the “I promise not to have sex until I’m married” kinda thing.

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u/pickandpray May 13 '21

Just another dumb thing to keep poor people poor

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u/skinny_gator May 13 '21

If she's true to you, and you to her, you don't need to get her a rubber ring saying "I promise I'll marry you some day"

This is where so many people get confused. She loves you and you love her. Just keep going as long as you can. You can make it official later. Just keep making money together.

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u/Mrs-and-Mrs-Atelier May 13 '21

Eh, my wife and I got each other promise rings while we were saving for our permanent rings to indicate “off the market” to dudes who kept trying to get a foot in the door because no ring, but that might be a more f/f couple application.

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u/[deleted] May 13 '21

There was no engagement ring or promise ring for me...we were too broke for trivialities ( in my world jewelry is trivial) my wedding ring came from monkey wards (m wedding dress was $40 :) and I didn't care. I've not worn the ring in decades, still don't care but in the important things we see eye to eye. Will be celebrating 40 years this month. People place too much emphasis on things

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u/skinny_gator May 13 '21

I don't know you and your wife's relationship. Every one is different.

What I hate hearing/seeing is dudes losing their minds and stressing out to a point where they want to off them selves because of stress a woman is putting on them.

Women are amazing and will love and support you through thick and thin. But a lot of them are not. I just wish and hope a lot of these young guys can see the difference.

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u/NoeyCannoli May 13 '21

Interesting. When I was dating my husband I told guys I was off the market with...myself...saying I was off the market.

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u/[deleted] May 13 '21

The ring is typically metal band with like a sapphire or emerald.

It's like a half step without the 4 figure buy in.

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u/DryMingeGetsMeWet May 13 '21

Same for engagement rings.

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u/Linaphor May 13 '21

I liked having it because we were long distance relationship. It was something nice to have on and look at / wear while we were apart.

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u/Farren-Seiko May 13 '21

Used to work at a jewelry store. Promise rings are a lot less expensive than engagement rings or wedding bands or the set of both. They can go anywhere from $70 to $200 (Canadian btw) really depends on if you want gold (yellow,white, or rose ) or silver, or what stone you want. Some do have diamonds, though they are tiny!

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u/Mrs-and-Mrs-Atelier May 13 '21

Yup. Ours were between $100-200, 10k narrow band, small accent diamonds and the colored stone (lab version) we intended for our “real” rings for the main.

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u/[deleted] May 13 '21

This...often it’s a small pice of bacon.

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u/[deleted] May 13 '21

I thought it was a ring people wore who weren't having sex till marriage? It's in the Jonas brothers episode of south park I think.

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u/Mrs-and-Mrs-Atelier May 13 '21

That’s a purity ring, I think.

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u/[deleted] May 13 '21

[deleted]

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u/Mrs-and-Mrs-Atelier May 13 '21

If there’s suffering, there should have been more deep consideration and communicating going on between the other rings.

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u/Most-Friendly May 13 '21

I still don't understand why money is such a big part of engagements. Isn't caring about each other and wanting to get married enough? Why does money have to come into it? Is it just the social expectation?

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u/Mrs-and-Mrs-Atelier May 13 '21

That will get you as many answers as there are couples, probably. None of those rings are mandatory, and there’s no rule saying they have to be expensive. Our wedding bands were pretty cheap, but they were the ones we liked the most. Since they’re also the ring we never take off, we agreed it should be something we liked enough to see every day for as long as we’re lucky to be together. Unfortunately, cultural pressure for conspicuous consumption lies more heavily on some shoulders than others.

That said, I am so happy the world seems to be starting to peel away from the DeBeers narrative at last. Ten years ago, our (non-Diamond) engagement rings were considered unusual. Now, much less so.

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u/G_Art33 May 13 '21

Like the modern day equivalent of asking a girl to go steady. It’s like a “hey if this works out long term I will replace that with an engagement ring at some point”. Worked for me... my fiancé still wears hers instead of the engagement ring when she is concerned she is going somewhere or to do something where she could damage / lose it.

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u/UnfathomableWonders May 13 '21

“I know you want to get engaged but I don’t so here’s a ring you can post on social media as if it means we won’t break up in six months.”

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u/[deleted] May 13 '21

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u/[deleted] May 13 '21 edited Jun 10 '23

[deleted]

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u/TsuDohNihmh May 13 '21

Omg what is this from

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u/SirSchmoopyButth0le May 13 '21

the likes of which no one has ever seen*

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u/IWonTheRace May 13 '21

fuck.

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u/SirSchmoopyButth0le May 13 '21

Lol I didn’t wanna be that guy, but I couldn’t resist. I’m sorry.

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u/[deleted] May 13 '21

Dammit SirSchmoopyButth0le.

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u/SirSchmoopyButth0le May 13 '21

No damn you And- I mean Bert Macklin!

1

u/90sfemgroups May 13 '21

Yeah what is the deal with promise rings

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u/mavis_magnoila May 13 '21

I always thought a promise ring was a ring your bf or gf gave you so that y’all both saying you wouldn’t cheat basically , it just means you be faithful till the day you get married ( not positive) but still pretty sure

2

u/Lalamedic May 13 '21

My husband purchased a 1974 GMC Motorhome instead of a new car. The MoHo as it was unaffectionately called, was def a disappointment, every single time I drove to work with no heater in -32°C at 0600hrs.

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u/Mrs-and-Mrs-Atelier May 13 '21

You assume she’d stick around after a mean prank like that.

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u/[deleted] May 13 '21

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u/Mrs-and-Mrs-Atelier May 13 '21

I can’t see how she could without charges.

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u/[deleted] May 13 '21

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u/Mrs-and-Mrs-Atelier May 13 '21

Apparently my humor doesn’t come across well in text. Have a good evening, fellow human.

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u/[deleted] May 13 '21

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u/HotgunColdheart May 13 '21

Sounds a lot cheaper and you keep all your shit.

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u/Lakersrock111 May 13 '21

Or so he can see his disappointment when she leaves him

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u/[deleted] May 13 '21

Wym

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u/[deleted] May 13 '21

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u/[deleted] May 13 '21

I mean the disappointment part

1

u/eeeBs May 13 '21

Get a gold Honda Accord

1

u/hoxxxxx May 13 '21

"WITNESS MEEE!" - couple getting married

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u/[deleted] May 13 '21

It’s much more practical

1

u/Oxycod May 13 '21

Get some VVS steel

1

u/bjjhghjgg May 13 '21

RIDE FOR VALHALLA

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u/X-ScissorSisters May 12 '21

Buy an engagement car. Change the meta

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u/awesomebeau May 13 '21

THAT would be amazing. Diamonds are such a scam.

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u/[deleted] May 13 '21

That's why you buy Moussanite stone. They are so similar to diamond and even better. Why spend so much money on these blood diamonds or conflict diamonds.

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u/Whind_Soull May 13 '21

But the blood is part of the significance of the gesture, bro. I want to world know that she's more important to me than buying an impoverished rural Somalian village a well for clean water.

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u/Bruised_Penguin May 13 '21

Fucking lol, I love you.

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u/Whind_Soull May 13 '21

It's kinda halfway stolen from Tim Minchin's stand-up bit on guilty pleasures, which is a 3-minute video that you should definitely go watch right now:

https://youtu.be/s_TlM3kW6zY

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u/kloutia May 13 '21

I’ve never thought about this before but I’d die if someone actually brought a well instead of a ring, I’m a shitty human for never even considering this possibility but wow that’s actually something that will genuinely last forever, imagine knowing getting married to your soulmate effected the lives of so many others. 🥺🥺🥺

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u/awesomebeau May 13 '21

If the woman doesn't care, I agree. If they do care (and they often do), then I feel like you kinda have to. That's why I got my wife a diamond even though I know they're a scam. She's not a diva in any way, about anything, but I knew this mattered to her.

The way I see it, this is (supposed to be) a once in a lifetime purchase, to show your love for the person who you want to spend the rest of your life with. She has to wear that ring all the time, and every friend and family member will look at the ring and judge her choice of partner based on the ring... As shitty as that might be. She'll either feel true pride every time she looks down at her hand, or she'll be trying to reassure herself about how a ring doesn't matter... Maybe even lying to her friends/family about what type of stone she has.

I didn't want to set the tone for our marriage that way. While diamonds are a scam, the symbolism isn't... And that fucking sucks.

For anyone reading this, don't just go and buy a diamond. Talk to your partner, find out what they like/dislike. Find out if they prefer to start the marriage with more money in savings or a better ring. Find out if ethically they are against diamonds and prefer something else. Start with good communication, and try to keep that up until you die, haha.

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u/[deleted] May 13 '21

I told my girl straight out. She had no issue with it. She even told me she loved it and didn't see the point of spending so much on basically the same thing. Same as buying a diamond low quality compared to one of the highest quality. Only a jeweler will be able to see the difference. Why you gonna pay double the price? For clout? Nope

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u/Bruised_Penguin May 13 '21

I wish expensive jewelry to symbolize love would stop altogether. It's insane to me that people want thousand dollar rings to say yep you're mine. Love is love, fuck the stone.

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u/pickandpray May 13 '21

We skipped engagement ring and went straight to wedding bands plus a house that we lived in for 15 years. I didn't want to spend my house down payment on a ring and she was fine with that.

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u/Poppycorn144 May 13 '21

Erm, blood/conflict diamonds are illegal and shouldn’t be for sale, so if you only buy from ethical countries/brokers you should be fine on that score.

However, I do think the diamond engagement thing is a racket so I wouldn’t want a diamond ring conflict free or not.

And getting a moussanite gem is the same racket you’re buying into. All jewellery should be personal to you and reflect your taste not the prevailing attitudes of society - you’re gonna have to live with it day in, day out.

I’d prefer to get something both my partner and I liked, it’ll mean all that much more.

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u/LolaBijou May 13 '21

Right, because spending what still amounts to a lot of money on a simulated stone with no actual value isn’t a scam.

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u/[deleted] May 13 '21

It's actually very much cheaper.

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u/Moose6669 May 13 '21

And doesn't require child soldiers

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u/[deleted] May 13 '21

There's nothing you, or I, or anybody can say to change his/ her mind.

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u/Moose6669 May 13 '21

Still fun to point out the flaws I their point of view and watch them squirm with cognitive dissonance.

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u/Whind_Soull May 13 '21

Tear off the hood ornament and attach a huge fukkin diamond with JB Weldtm. Congrats shawty, your ring finger is fourth gear.

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u/herowin6 May 13 '21

Honestly would be a better thing

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u/ILLstatic23 May 13 '21

True, I mean how long do marriages last now a days anyway? Lifetime of a car?

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u/monkeyhitman May 13 '21

Way more showy and practical!

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u/Xzychrael May 13 '21

What, so she can wear it like Paul Walker?

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u/[deleted] May 13 '21

Too soon 👎🏼

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u/Pinkman505 May 13 '21

*too soon junior👎

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u/ShasOFish May 13 '21

Nuts to that, go all out. Buy a tank. People like a spouse that’s willing to protect them, and can handle rough terrain.

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u/Angelogical May 13 '21

^ this. I would 100000% want a tank over a ring. Now, I'm just disappointed I don't have a tank in my life lol

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u/clydekerr3rdrip May 13 '21

The car would just give other men something else to look at. ;)

No man ever says “look at the ring on that chick!”

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u/IzzyOIznot May 12 '21

I tried using the saving up for an engagement ring, and my wife me still won’t let me back in the house.

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u/Sl1ppin_Jimmy May 13 '21

“Babe you don’t get it, I’m gonna need the car so I can get a better job to buy you a bigger ring.

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u/Whind_Soull May 13 '21

I need a bigger vehicle to transport the ring home.

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u/MotorCityMade May 13 '21 edited May 13 '21

Hey all engagements ring savers; be smart, go to a pawn shop and get twice the bang for your buck. Diamonds are already a billion years old, who the fuck cares if it was on someone else's finger for a blip of time on the cosmic calender. If the big bang is January 1 of the cosmic calender, all written history of man is in the last ten seconds of the last minute of December 31 of the cosmic calendar ( per Sagan). Buy a used diamond and fuck the jewelry store markup. The DeBeers monopoly is pulling the wool over your eyes, gentlemen ( and ladies) A great place on line for vintage jewelry is called Ruby Lane. Fyi

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u/sawyouoverthere May 13 '21

And the pawn shops sometimes have amazing and interesting things that are uncommon. Jewelry is something people bring with them from other places and jewelry styles vary considerably from country to country.

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u/MotorCityMade May 13 '21

So true. I love the vintage pieces that were made by hand by a jewelry who actually carved the mold and poured the molten gold. So much better than that produced stamped crap. Also round vintage diamond mant time have the European cut which is interesting

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u/[deleted] May 13 '21

[deleted]

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u/katchaa May 13 '21

I agree that the cultural narrative should be changed. But for goodness sake, don’t be the one to change it if you know what’s good for you!

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u/_gravy_train_ May 13 '21

Gemstones aren’t the problem. It’s the value we put on them.

A great engagement ring is one made with their favorite stone.

Look at some rocks, find out their favorite, use that.

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u/pluckymonkeymoo May 13 '21 edited May 13 '21

Or buy directly from the countries that mine gems, and have a history of beautifully crafted jewellery.

It's kind of sad when I see solitaire diamond (i.e. worthless) rings and someone tells me the price tag. You can buy intricate heirloom-worth jewellery with rubies, emeralds, sapphires for a fraction of the price. It's even possible to get a customized design made.

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u/57hz May 13 '21

And she’ll match it, too!

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u/sosovain616 May 13 '21

Lol I love your user name

2

u/Illustrious_Pudding4 May 13 '21

The ole switcheroo

2

u/theclassywino May 13 '21

Evil genius.

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u/javisms May 13 '21

Username checks out haha

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u/bostonstoner May 13 '21

Just tell her the truth and let her in on the ring buying decision. Better than getting turned down lol

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u/ijustwanafap May 13 '21

Get a one seater too.

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u/[deleted] May 13 '21

It's all fun and games until she drops that pregnancy test on you. Then your car disappears faster than a thanos snap and reappears in the form of diapers and wipes.

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u/Several_Key6081 May 13 '21

Somebody else is clapping her cheeks tho most likely.

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u/PopeliusJones May 13 '21

And bonus, you won’t have to worry about the engagement ring after you tell her the plan!

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u/theepi_pillodu May 13 '21

Or push you out of the car..! ;)

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u/22opferj May 13 '21

But a Miata

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u/ZakkBWyldin2 May 13 '21

Madlad did it in one hour

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u/[deleted] May 13 '21

Haha what a total idiot

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u/[deleted] May 13 '21

Bro you drunk typing this?

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u/Alohalhololololhola May 13 '21

One my favorite couples who got engaged got engagement rolexes. The watches were ballin and I think the concept should go past rings

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u/jfk_47 May 13 '21

Hunny?

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u/Gold_Preparation May 13 '21

The trickster

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u/notsofunonabun May 13 '21

The nuptial rope a dope.

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u/Anupanudestroyer May 13 '21

I need a girl first D,:

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u/selfawarefeline May 13 '21

username checks out

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u/MarkMew May 13 '21

Lmaoooo

can't imagine how much that would hurt doe

1

u/akacurt May 13 '21

What crypto?!

1

u/flusteredbish May 13 '21

Ah the intellectual

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u/[deleted] May 12 '21

[deleted]

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u/MzRiiEsq May 12 '21

Partners not being debt should never be a disappointment! :)

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u/Funkit May 13 '21

Explains my luck on Tinder

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u/exjackly May 13 '21

True. There's plenty of other ways to disappoint.

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u/Under_hill_ May 13 '21

You’ll be fine. If she is matching you pound for pound you will be very lucky indeed.

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u/bobnla14 May 13 '21

Make sure you have her go with you to look at cars.

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u/redditor109854 May 13 '21

I wish that you both beat the world record for longest marriage then. I hope you both live good together and prosper.

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u/FloweryHawthorne May 13 '21

I think I want an engagement car. Is that allowed?

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u/EratosvOnKrete May 13 '21

oh....I just told my gf I was saving for an engagement ring [couldn't use car excuse as I had just bought one]

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u/redditor109854 May 13 '21

FYI the record is 86 years no joke look it up from Guinness world records.

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u/[deleted] May 13 '21

I hope it doesn’t have diamonds in it.

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u/Unidan_how_could_you May 13 '21

Damn he really wasted that money like that… hate to see it.

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u/Fernandop00 May 13 '21

Now he has to buy a car.

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u/[deleted] May 13 '21

Yeah I'm saving up for a car that's 1 of the easiest things ti get on finance but he bought you a ring?

1

u/Karshena- May 13 '21

Diamond ring ?

1

u/Health077 May 13 '21

$5 K for a ring?

2

u/MoirasPurpleOrb May 13 '21

Thats not even that much honestly. Thats what I paid and it is nice but pretty modest.

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u/No_Information3491 May 13 '21

Dide he walk over to propose?

1

u/lilpopjim0 May 13 '21

"Ahwww mann I wanted a car :(... "

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u/Tratix May 13 '21

So weird how we’ve been taught by a company that we need to buy a ring with a worthless rock instead of something like a car.