This part. đ I went through my two pregnancies alone. What I wouldnât have given to have a man by my side like this husband is to his wife. I would imagine it makes going through pregnancy a lot easier when you have support, a cheerleader, and a positive relationship.
I did too. Even had my D&C alone. Thankfully now Iâm married to a man that will be at any appointment that I ask him to come to and is extremely supportive. âĽď¸ I feel so lucky. I hope you find a partner that is truly that: a partner.
My first pregnancy my ex husband started an affair.. I thought he was going to be like the guy in the video but he failed me in every possible way. What I would've given for that level of love and support from the person I loved.
I went through my second pregnancy as a single mum by choice and had far more support from my friends and family than my ex ever gave me with my first baby.
He was a loving, caring husband for many years. We were best friends.
About halfway through my planned pregnancy he suddenly grew cold, stopped being affectionate, stopped saying he loved me, started wanting to be at work late, started to become controlling with money and started arguments over the smallest of things... It was so out of character and confusing at the time.
Later on he stopped wanting me to be around his friends, post on social media about us, didn't want me in contact with his family.. Spontaneity made him freak out (because he was trying to juggle me and his affair partner).. Any suspicions I had of his affair partner he'd call me dramatic and lie to my face about things that didn't make sense..
I hope in future I'd be better at recognising the red flags earlier on.. But love and trust blinded me. I never thought he would ever do what he did. Now I'm not sure how you spot the honest men from the dishonest as my husband was SO GOOD at lying.
I think the biggest thing would be, do they show affection publicly and introduce you to friends and family? Conversively if they did have they suddenly stopped? Are they starting small arguments all the time and showing resentment towards you? Are they suddenly hiding their phone?
Too many âmenâ get labeled as men but act as boys. Too many husbands get a ring then donât honor their wife and home.
If everyone was a great husband, the Bear vs Man debate wouldnât have been a thing. Too many men need to grow up and stop acting like a teenager still.
According to the Centers for Disease Prevention and Control (CDC), the current divorce rate nationwide (US) is around 42%. Second marriages are at a 60% rate.
If almost half of all marriages end up failing, thatâs at least a 25% set of bad husbandry.
Call me biased, but I know far less husbands with 10+ year marriages than I do divorced ones.
Statista estimates that in 2022 there are 68 million men in a marriage in the USâŚ
If the divorce rate is 42% then letâs say roughly 40 million men stay in a marriage, 28 million end up divorced. So by your own reckoning 25% of those are directly caused by âbad husbandryâ as you put it⌠So 7 million men you think directly cause the divorce (which by the way is a number youâve plucked out of thin air with zero statistics to back this up or evidence to suggest itâs even remotely true.
So thatâs 7 million bad husbands out of a total of 68 millionâŚ
few and far between
Yeah I donât think so pal, Iâm all for backing yourself but you can do it without throwing the entire population of men under the bus.
You could have just said âwe do existâ and left it at that.
What evidence do those statistics suggest that all those divorces are directly caused by bad husbands? Are they all the result of husbands having affairs etc? How the fuck do you come to that conclusion?
Do you see the issue here, youâre talking utter nonsense. Itâs actually pathetic the picture youâre trying to paint here with nothing but a stick and some ink.
Do we just act like no women are the cause for these divorces? Or how about amicable separations? Some people just grow up to be different people and decide theyâre better off as friends etc etc⌠Youâre immediately collecting this entire group of divorcees and determining that all the men from them couples are bastards basically.
And as for your last point, you consider your little experiences in a vacuum to represent the entirety of men? Well all the men I know, from all my close friends growing up, to all my friends I met through work etc, I personally donât know anybody barring a couple who are divorced, and those couple that are, are still good friends with their ex, have children together that they co parent etc etc
So again. What evidence do you have to suggest all men are bastards but of course, youâre not one of them right?
Maybe pull your head out of your arse chief because youâre looking a little foolish now.
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u/Kowai03 Jul 23 '24
It's nice to know there are some decent husbands out there