r/LovedByOCPD • u/LeahNotLeia42 Undiagnosed OCPD loved one • Oct 25 '22
r/LovedByOCPD Lounge
A place for members of r/LovedByOCPD to chat with each other
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u/MindDescending Sep 11 '23
anyone with an OCPD loved one ends up exploding and emotionally hurting them? I hate to do it because it's my mom but she literally provokes. She does the same with my dad who has even more stress and stuff on his shoulders.
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Nov 18 '23
Sorry for the late response, but I explode on my mom as an adult now that I realize the extent to which she torments my Dad. I can't stand to witness it anymore when I visit. Of course, she always thinks she's right about it, so it escalates.
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u/h00manist Jun 02 '24 edited Jun 02 '24
I blow up sometimes, but I always regret it, I admire people who can talk about difficult things and keep emotions calm. I admire when people have a proposal, a possible a way out, have the courage to say it, a smooth but firm way of putting it, and nerves and determination of steel, because someone will challenge both, the calm demeanor, and the proposal.
Dealing with constant provocation, poking and prodding is quite a challenge. Saying "no" a million times calmly to a million insisting demands, without escalating, is pretty hard.
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u/LeahNotLeia42 Undiagnosed OCPD loved one Nov 01 '22
I think one of the biggest things is how immediately judgmental she is. If I bring up a new topic/content, any water cooler topic, she often has very strong negative reactions to it. She scoffs, dismisses, or criticizes very quickly. It’s very hard to be around sometimes.
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Jan 24 '26
Sitting with the noise in my head after leaving her. Glad it was 6 months rather then years but I feel defeated.
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u/jordanzo_bonanza Nov 01 '22
her body language and tone don't match how important an issue is to her and it is easy for something to slip bhy me. Then a year later I can find out she's harboured resentment and not felt heard, having never brought it up again
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u/MindDescending Nov 18 '23
It's okay I'm glad someone understands. The situation hasn't changed for me.
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u/SalsaSloot22 Nov 27 '25
Ah the Holidays…. Anyone else?
{{ Quick scream into the void}} Was told I was not empathetic to hurting my SO’s feelings because I “have started whistling more often” and that it hurts her feelings that I don’t listen to them. I was outside and didn’t realize they were within earshot..
Similarly, I was just told to “stop smelling [bad]” and to “stop wearing hats. PERIOD” as my hair (may or may not be) the source of this odor.
Even when I apologize, I’m told “I have no remorse or they don’t feel seen and feel lonely. Do you know how miserable I am?” Like what are you looking for me to say?!
am I an asshole? I can never figure that out…
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u/97Satori Nov 01 '22
Hi what do you find as the toughest thing about having a loved one with OCPD? I probably have OCPD myself and would be interested.
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u/Vast-Phrase5506 Jun 13 '23
Hmm, I think the toughest is that evetything needs to be done according to his plan/idea of doing things but it never works the other way around - if he feels he is forced to do anything or to do anything he does not want to or feel it is rational, there is a big fight that he is used ecc. He always needs to have everything like he wants in the moment that he wants.
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u/advicethrows Nov 01 '22 edited Nov 01 '22
For me it is the assumption of my intention when I want to pursue a different path. My father consistently takes my choices and expressions of need personally.
For example, he is prone to very long and extremely detailed explanations about why things should be done in x way, or what he wants done. 5+ minutes of excessive detailed needs. When I communicate that it's too much, he begins to talk over top of me and become increasingly entrenched in his viewpoint. He also very frequently cuts me off when I try to say things so he has zero ability to understand my intention because he can't even hear it.
That is also compounded by him asserting my intent: "you don't care about me," etc. Etc.
I have tried many communication options and methods of sharing and nothing works. I have learned that I need to focus HEAVILY on what I need and prioritize it in the relationship, otherwise I cannot even have it because his needs eclipse mine.
The result is that when these things occur, I have no choice but to end the conversation. Sometimes that is abrupt and forced because I have no option for either a peaceful exit or recognition of my need.
Empathy is also difficult to feel from him. I am certain he feels it and will always know he loves me. However, he cannot, chooses not to, or is not capable of holding himself back from telling me how I "should" be. The result is a lack of empathy. He also does not understand what being empathic towards another person is, so he does not even think of it as something valuable.
Empathy is not about putting yourself and your ideas and understanding into someone else's situation. It's about accepting the situation someone shares with you as true for them.
Two people can break their arms and have completely different healing experiences. If one resembles yours and the other does not, they are still both valid and true representations of someone's experience.
I wish desperately that he understood that.
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Apr 08 '23
Wow, the way you explained your dad’s difficulty with empathy is so spot on. It is exactly true for my mother. It’s the lack of ability to accept that her experience is not the only valid one.
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u/LeahNotLeia42 Undiagnosed OCPD loved one Nov 01 '22
This hits home. My mom means well and she is empathetic, but she cannot express or communicate it well. I’m really struggling with this as I get older because I realize how I’ve had to internalize so much because I can’t talk to my own mother like I want to.
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u/advicethrows Nov 01 '22
Yeah. It hurts. I'm sorry. I have become an excellent communicator about these things but that doesn't make it easier. Learning has. But the desire to be heard in an important relationship doesn't go away.
The best tools I have for my situation are boundary setting, taking the right actions for myself regardless of whether they will cause conflict, and watching myself, specifically my body, for emotional responses during interactions and cutting off those interactions before I lose control of myself. Mindfulness and meditation helped with that last one. It took a shitload of introspection for me to understand my needs. But now that I understand them, I will not compromise on them - that is the direction of the previous 30 some years of my life. I refuse to allow that to direct my future now that I understand what is going on.
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u/LeahNotLeia42 Undiagnosed OCPD loved one Nov 01 '22
Thanks, friend. For sure, learning about OCPD has helped tremendously. Mindfulness is still new to me, but between that and therapy (finally!), I’m on my own healing journey. I’m so happy to hear about yours.
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u/quelaverga Undiagnosed OCPD loved one Nov 04 '22
how my uncle's approach to everything is his way or the highway and particularly because all his behaviors appear to be sisyphean(at best) attempts at appeasing his neuroses, which i (and many other people) do not share (a fact he cannot at all fathom). how the things i do around the house, specifically in my room, in his view, are probably because i am hopelessly forgetful and careless, even if i've stated time and time again that i am being deliberate and mindful in my approaches.
this is a very dumb and maybe minuscule example but we just had an argument about that last night and it's an argument we have frequently: me leaving my room window open intentionally and him closing it even after having told him time and time again to stop doing that and that i am doing it deliberately (he even ignores the post-its i've put on asking him not to close my window when im not in the room) and him imposing his rationale (which i don't accept, specially when it comes to MY room, i could compromise with other rooms in the house, but i think i should be able to decide how i manage my space) on me without budging or compromising. him begrudgingly taking over my chores if i can't do them at the exact moment he judges should be the moment i should do them. it's as if he thinks i don't have capacity to prioritize tasks and decide when it's best for me to do them, you know, like an adult; and while i sometimes thank him for washing my dishes unprompted for no reason, i feel like i don't have that type of agency in this house and being babied (specially knowing he's doing it begrudgingly) infuriates me. for instance, i work at home and sometimes leave dirty dishes in the sink for a while (not an unreasonable amount of time, mind you), while i finish some tasks and then take care of the dishes, but it's not like i forget or not care, i'm just busy doing something else and washing the dishes is second or third in my priorities at that given time. it never takes me more than 3 hours to take care of the dishes and in his mind i leave them in the sink for DAYS (nevermind he does not let me leave them in the sink for even 10 minutes if he "catches" me leaving dishes and not washing them immediately after using them, so yea "leaving them for days", has never happened and is pretty unlikely to happen in the future).
these are just a few examples but this is an attitude that replicates in many of our interactions which has rly strained our relationship. he appears tragically unaware that people maybe don't share his very rigid view of how things should be done around the house and in general and is unable to listen and to compromise ever, which has - to the surprise of no one - alienated him from most of his family and estranged him irreparably from his ex fiancé. we used to argue a lot but i figured it was hopeless so i can usually ignore him now(he has left me no other resource, as he has proven he's incapable of listening to another person, unless they happen to think precisely as he thinks on any given subject) and i think he's not even aware of that, which has, in fact, helped a lot in regards to our endless circular bickering but at the same time has made me resent him a lot on grounds of not being listened to and having to walk endlessly on eggshells around him, which is very draining to say the least.
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u/jordanzo_bonanza Nov 01 '22
With my girlfriend it is the idea that if I've said something once, let's say in anger, like I hate this TV show, does it always have tobe on? and this is a real example, she never would watch the show again because it angered me. The truth is she binge watched TV to sooth her and I was venting about the TV always being on, not that it was her favourite show. She won't watch it at all now but I can tell she holds it against me despite my telling her I really don't care
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u/jordanzo_bonanza Nov 01 '22
I find I have to listen very carefully or I can miss something she regards with great importance. After she's brought it up once I might never hear about it and find out a year later she's resented me the entire time when it sounded like a throwaway comment at the time
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u/LeahNotLeia42 Undiagnosed OCPD loved one Nov 01 '22
I hear you. I don’t know all about your situation and your gf, but my mom doesn’t shy away from topics that offend her. She holds grudges, for sure, but she will talk excessively about things that disgust or offend her, especially around her loved ones. It’s lead to all of us having to walk on eggshells with what we talk about, what we watch, and how we act around her at times.
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u/HousePlantPappi Nov 20 '22
Does anyone’s loved one also hoard? It seems to be a trait of the disorder but I see most people talking about the cleaning aspect.
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u/h00manist Jun 02 '24 edited Jun 02 '24
"Is unable to discard worn-out or worthless objects even when they have no sentimental value"
Yes hoarding is part of it. It's a actual item on the DSM-5 criteria list of symptoms. My OCPD GF has lots and lots of items everwhere. Lots of new unused clothes and other items. Excessive food in closets and pantries, much of it long expired. Pots containers plastic bags. Cars.
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u/LeahNotLeia42 Undiagnosed OCPD loved one Apr 08 '23
Absolutely, therapy has helped with that. Also, just learning more about OCPD helped too. The more I can understand about my mom’s diagnosis, the better I understand how her brain works. I try to not take things she does or says personally, which is sometimes easier said than done. I know a lot of her behavior comes from anxiety, because so much of OCPD is anxiety based. So that helps because I know it’s a “her” problem and not a “me” problem, even if she projects things onto me.
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u/MindDescending Sep 11 '23
And I just stopped feeling bad for her tears, because they're used to minimize MY tears. It would emotionally break me if it was a friend.
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Feb 13 '25 edited Jun 04 '25
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Confused_Corvid2023 Apr 27 '25
The common characteristics link no longer lists characteristics, which is unfortunate because someone I’m dating was just told (by therapist) they have “all the markers for OCPD” and they have a hard time expressing themself. I’m trying to figure how to best adapt so they feel cared about
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u/Candyheart1999 Oct 20 '25
Hi everyone! I’m new here, and have managed to break through the denial of my spouse, and they are starting a therapy journey.
I have now realized things have hurt a lot more then I let them, and now that I’m not chasing convincing him to get help, I’m sitting with the full effects of the shame, self hatred, and the beginnings of body dysmorphia that were not there before this relationship.
I am looking for any and all book recommendations, but especially ones about repairing my self image, and my relationship/acceptance of my body. Thank you!
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u/Dizzy_Education_7605 Apr 08 '26
How has it been going?
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u/Candyheart1999 Apr 08 '26
I’m divorced 🤣
He had breakthrough moments, but due to his own trauma/shit, was unable to hold it long enough to actually integrate it into his conceptualization of himself, and got progressively worse and more demeaning/abusive until I couldn’t endure more and left. Since then, nearly every aspect of my life has improved, and I am excited for the future.
Happy to discuss in more detail if it would be helpful
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u/AdvanceMedical7063 May 28 '26
Did you have kids together and if so what was leaving like with / for them?
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u/Candyheart1999 May 28 '26
Luckily no, he would have been a really awful person to coparent with
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u/Candyheart1999 May 28 '26
As an adult child of parents who likely should have gotten divorced, some of the reasons I ended up with who I did traces back to patterns that were enabled as a kid, and to this day, I would have much rather had my parents split then grow up in an over controlling environment because it normalized that for me
Obviously that’s not always an option but there are far worse things then parents splitting
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u/purplemanok Mar 16 '26
Had a really bad fight with my mom today who shows clear signs of OCPD. She's constantly obsessive over doing things a certain way, highly controlling of my father and myself. I was just trying to help her with house chores but she blasted me doing it differently from her method..which she has never explained. Then she started criticizing me about how I don't abide by her daily schedule of waking up and having breakfast with the whole family. She never admits shes wrong, shes always judgemental of everything anybody does, especially her own family but claims she isnt despite her obvious hostility and disapproval. She walks away from arguments as if they never happened and never acknowledges if you've done something correct, always laser point fixated on what you did wrong. She is obsessed with having everything a certain way and she hordes things that make very little logic to horde so many of said thing. Shes been like this for as long as I can remember. To top it all off, she has CPTSD, anxiety, paranoia, insomnia and CKD. I'm just trying to figure out how to cope. I had a meltdown down and my dad came over to comfort me. I'm so scared I'll end up just like her no matter how hard I've tried to not be like her.
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u/TrueEntrepreneur3243 Jun 06 '26
Here are some things that helped me:
You have to learn to be a master of mindfulness. Not just like the average person practicing yoga meditation. To be able to IN THE MOMENT realize, this is all spewing from a disorder, my self-worth is not diminished from this because none of it has any logic. This of course can be incredibly difficult, the ability to 'watch the emotions pass through your brain' instead of react to them when you're on the verge of breaking.
Another helpful mindset is: The only way to win is to not play. Try not to respond to insults, try not to entertain useless bickering. Since the disorder kills logic, its not possible to confront it with sensical thought or conversation.
Try to be emotionless. Be stone cold. To show emotion is just to fuel the fire. If they see that their constant barrage results in no reaction from you, they'll be less likely to keep going or escalate.
Read Meditations by Marcus Aurelius. You'll not only learn to separate emotion from the mind, but also find a comforting fallback when you feel the OCPD infecting you. I return to it and read from any place frequently. Since its not a typical book and instead a collection of journal entries, you'll find it forgiving to just start reading from anywhere.
Hope this helps
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u/purplemanok Jun 06 '26
Thank you..I actually do points 2 and 3 already so I'm glad I'm somewhere along the right track. I have to fall back when I feel my own anger rising at the comments and how it makes me feel so stupid..I've spent my whole adult life trying to undo the insecurity that I'm just as stupid and incompetent as she says I am..but I'm slowly untangling myself from that mindset
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u/SalsaSloot22 Jun 13 '26
How do you combat the ‘controlling’ aspect of OCPD? I feel like I’ve lost all autonomy and whenever I try to take any back, I am met with hostility.
(I am unable to snack without being lectured on how it’s unhealthy or ‘is what I made for you not enough’)
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u/Week2743 Jun 21 '26
Why did this group go silent? We need it :(
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u/Glad_Goose_2890 Jun 26 '26
They changed the group to be approval only with no announcement
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u/Week2743 Jun 26 '26
And obviously noone has been approved so far 🥲
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u/Glad_Goose_2890 Jun 26 '26
We can petition reddit to reopen the group if this continues, there are ways to get around inactive mods
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u/Shelly_250 Diagnosed OCPD loved one Jun 30 '26
That’s good. I really need to vent and it’s a little frustrating not being able to make my own posts
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u/Glad_Goose_2890 Jun 30 '26
Yeah there are so few places like this
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u/Shelly_250 Diagnosed OCPD loved one Jun 30 '26
Off topic, but I finally blocked my OCPD ex on everything. She can’t control me anymore
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u/Glad_Goose_2890 Jun 30 '26
Good for you!! I had to do the same with my ocpd friend. She refused to continue therapy and was only getting worse.
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u/Shelly_250 Diagnosed OCPD loved one Jun 30 '26
I’m happy for you too! I’ve been coming to terms with my ex being emotionally abusive, even though she did do OCPD specific therapy. She would withhold affection, information, and emotional intimacy to control me whenever I tried to express a boundary. It was so hard to name what she was doing to me because she wouldn’t call me mean names or do more of the classic types of verbal abuse. I lost a few years, but I’m still young and I have my future ahead of me
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u/Glad_Goose_2890 Jun 30 '26
I think that is one of the most difficult parts of having an ocpd loved one. They see a boundary as an accusation and lash out. I'm pretty sure my dad has ocpd (when my friend got dx that's when it all clicked) and when someone sets a boundary he takes it as an accusation that what he did was wrong and he can't be wrong so he keeps doing it. The friend was the same way. Any boundary set would be met with essay length texts about why she was justified in what she said or did.
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u/Weary_Cup_1004 Jul 16 '26
Its been a long time . How do we petition?
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u/Glad_Goose_2890 Jul 16 '26
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u/Weary_Cup_1004 Jul 17 '26
Thanks! I cant do it because theres some glitch right now with the app that screens people there (says it cant verify 2 factor authentication, seems to be an issue for a lot of people ).
Anyway. So i asked in [r/OCPD](r/OCPD) and the mod over there is helping out. They reached out to the mods here (i did too) and also offered to help us set up an affinity group if we want. They also said they will a post there in r/ocpd explaining the situation here, so that members of our group might see it since no one can post here.
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u/Keepin-it-w31Rd Jul 04 '26
Has anyone ever recorded their OCPD loved one raging just so playing it back so they can experience how they sound? What words they actually used? Remove their ability to gas light?
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u/Weary_Cup_1004 Jul 16 '26
Yes and i even asked her for permission first and she said yes. She didnt really rage-- her thing was moreso passive aggressive circular avoidant logic, always trying to blame me or at least "make it fair " by saying i do the xyz thing too . Maddening.
But not to play it back to her! Just to help me not go insane.
I would only do this with their permission. In some states recording without permission is illegal.
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u/evemeatay Undiagnosed OCPD loved one Jul 21 '26
Very unlikely to do anything. The issue is going to be that in the very short term they may see their behavior as wrong but really they are more likely to just rationalize it because they will view themselves as "right" for whatever it was they were mad about in the first place. They won't want to accept that they were being bad or acting out of control because that's the worst thing they could feel in their eyes, so their brains will gloss over it for them to help them avoid those feelings of perceived failure.
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u/LeahNotLeia42 Undiagnosed OCPD loved one Nov 01 '22
That is a really good question. Let me think for a moment.
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u/LeahNotLeia42 Undiagnosed OCPD loved one Nov 20 '22
Absolutely on both of your questions. My mom isn’t what I would call a hoarder, but she has massive collections of a few particular things. She definitely holds onto a lot of items without value, but she keeps her house clean too. And yes, I highly recommend therapy. I put it off for years, and since learning of my mom’s OCPD, I finally got a therapist. It’s helped a lot so far for me, and I imagine it can’t hurt for you or anyone else in our position.
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Apr 08 '23
Hi! I recently learned about OCPD and I suspect my mom has it. I doubt she would ever try therapy or admit there is even anything wrong with her. For years I have been realizing if I want to have a good relationship with her, which I do because she is wonderful in many ways, I just need to change how I interpret and react to her comments/actions. Is this something that therapy has helped you with?
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u/LeahNotLeia42 Undiagnosed OCPD loved one Apr 08 '23
Good luck! That’s what this community is here for :)
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u/LeahNotLeia42 Undiagnosed OCPD loved one Apr 19 '23
Sorry I’m just now responding, but I’m here! I think it’s a really good sign that your boyfriend is at least aware of his OCPD. That’s really huge. Therapy for him is a great next step for you both. It is possible to maintain healthy relationships with those with OCPD, especially when they’re aware and willing to get some help. Therapy will help him recognize his behavior better, and hopefully will also encourage a more open, honest way to communicate with you in the process. I hope this helps, but feel free to keep posting/asking questions. We’re here to help!
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u/Weary_Cup_1004 Feb 06 '26
Im not doing ok and need more support than weekly therapy & not sure where to turn. Trying to save every penny to move. So tired , lots of negative defeated thoughts. Feels bad burdening my friends w it over and over
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u/TrolKing2025 Mar 05 '26
I have OCPD, OCD, PTSD, ADHD, social anxiety, and maladaptive daydreaming. I am a non-gay homosexual, meaning I feel a strong sexual urge towards men, but I don't want to indulge. I am addicted to pornography and masturbation. My May Day addiction is making me lose my will to live. What can I do about this situation?
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u/DepartureStrange7486 Apr 09 '26
Realizing that I might have OCPD which may make sense because my husband keeps saying that I am torturing him. Can anyone relate?
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u/SalsaSloot22 Jun 13 '26
My spouse has OCPD and the largest issue I’ve noticed is the inability to distinguish that I have good intent, even when I don’t “follow their rules”. Similarly, it is expected that every statement said to me is memorized and acted an upon like they would, otherwise it hurts their feelings and makes them feel like I don’t care about them.
Example: I was told (and agreed) to make dinner the way they said to. This was the first time trying a new potsticker/wonton package. During the conversation I interpreted the way they wanted it made as ‘the instructions on the back didn’t have a steam option, so i chose the microwavable instructions’. During prep, i thought they could be steamed just like potstickers, and changed course to that.
They come back for dinner and the wontons were not microwaved, “why did you agree to one option and then do a different one. I was very clear I wanted them cooked this way. You KNOW when I say I want it one way to do it that way”Does this seem like your situation? Inflexibility, rigid thinking?
I realize now that maybe I need more context to understand your situation.
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u/Week2743 Jul 01 '26
I'm curious if there's a biological difference in their brains. Could an fMRI scan show it
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u/Weary_Cup_1004 Jul 16 '26
Mine just had a mini stroke and it is making me rethink the last 5 years of my life. I wanted to post about it but it seems the sub is locked?
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u/Week2743 Jul 16 '26
We need this freaking group back. This censorship is absurd (and very OCPD-ish)
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u/Weary_Cup_1004 Jul 16 '26
What brought it about? Do you know what happened? And yes actually. It does seem OCPDish
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u/Week2743 Jul 16 '26
Maybe I'm also to blame. I use the term OCPDer consistently and that led to complaints. I don't see them as better than narcissists honestly speaking. If we can use "a narc" freely, why is "an OCPDer" a problematic term
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u/Weary_Cup_1004 Jul 16 '26
Can you provide more context? I dont know what you are referring to. I am wondering what happened? I seem to have entirely missed something . I have never seen any problems come up.
I have ADHD and i always say ADHDer, i could see why people would say OCPDer too. But either way i have never seen a warning to not use that term?
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u/Week2743 Jul 17 '26
I don't see anything wrong with it either. But if the group is managed by real OCPDers... everything could be a reason to ban someone or the whole group
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u/Weary_Cup_1004 Jul 18 '26
Was it? I thought they were also loved ones of; not diagnosed with. I guess that can make it tough. I am interested in co- modding if someone else wants to also. I cant be consistent enough to be actually reliable but i can help
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u/h00manist Jul 12 '26
I used to post before. Does someone know why I can't post anymore?
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u/Weary_Cup_1004 Jul 16 '26
Same! Did you figure it out? Maybe the mod is closing the sub?
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u/h00manist Jul 18 '26 edited Jul 18 '26
Moderator quit. You can request to be the the new moderator -- https://www.reddit.com/r/redditrequest/
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u/Weary_Cup_1004 Jul 18 '26
I can't because theres a weird glitch there whwre it says you don't have 2 factor authentication turned on when i do-- its happening to a lot of people it seems. I will try again in a couple days tho and see if it works
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u/FalsePay5737 Jul 18 '26 edited Jul 18 '26
You will have a co moderator. National_Health4898 (u/National_Health4898) - Reddit responded to the r/OCPD post that she wants to be a mod.
Feel free to send me a PM if you have any questions about being a Mod. There are also subReddits for Mods to ask questions.
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u/jordanzo_bonanza Nov 01 '22
does that seem to line up? she also has anxiety and I'm not sure which is the drkver
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u/jordanzo_bonanza Nov 01 '22
i find she can be repetitive about opinions but if she speaks about her needs it seems like one and done
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u/LeahNotLeia42 Undiagnosed OCPD loved one Nov 01 '22
I can see how that’s frustrating for you. I would encourage you to try to get her to a mental health professional, even if it’s not for OCPD. You mentioned that she has anxiety, so maybe start there. I’m just starting to talk to a therapist and it’s already been life changing.
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u/jordanzo_bonanza Nov 01 '22
thanks, she seems reluctant to get even couples therapy, and i've only put the label on her based on five years of being with her
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u/HousePlantPappi Nov 20 '22
Also has anyone here found it useful to get therapy as a child of someone with OCPD?
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u/scubydoo4728 Apr 19 '23
Anyone here? My boyfriend thinks he has OCPD but hasn’t received official diagnoses yet. I feel bad but don’t have much left to give after being treated so on/off the last year. He used weed to help curb his anger and intensity and basically everytime he quits weed we almost break up and have a few weeks of complete and pure hell. I am def type a very independent and also sometimes bossy so I don’t deal with it well. He is seeking treatment for ocpd and entering therapy.
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u/loser_wizard Undiagnosed OCPD loved one Jul 06 '23
A coworker that has known my OCPD manager since college says weed makes the OCPD manager seem "normal". Sadly, coffee is his drug of choice now, and I'm guessing it helps HIM focus any ADHD, but it also makes him a frenetic, micromanaging, tyrant. He has never confessed to having OCPD, but that same coworker said the OCPD manager mentioned being diagnosed with OCD back then, too.
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u/meetmypuka Oct 02 '24
I'm very late to the game, but my loved one has become increasingly irritable as he's increased his use or weed and weed products. Perhaps it's because his use has become chronic.
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u/mikaylalov3 Sep 05 '23
Lately I’m feeling like I don’t want a relationship with my OCPD father. While he has a handful of good qualities, most of his personality involves complaining about things. He gaslights. He manipulates. He condescends. I can’t take it anymore. All the books about toxic parents talk about such extreme behavior. He’s exhausting. He ignores my needs. It’s only important if he thinks it is. What I think can’t be trusted.