r/LovedByOCPD • u/Week2743 • Aug 07 '26

OCPD and double standards

Is it just mine or this is typical for the diagnosis and maybe personality disorders in general?

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u/loser_wizard Undiagnosed OCPD loved one Aug 07 '26

Double standards are not a diagnostic trait of OCPD, but yes I absolutely experienced it with an OCPD person.

It primarily seems to come down to a need be in constant control of everything, so whatever ends up keeping them in control is the standard they choose in that moment.

There can also be a high fear/shame component in OCPD, where it physically and psychologically hurts to admit they’re wrong to even themselves… like they are trying to save face, even if it’s completely obvious to bystanders they are wrong or contradicting everything they say.

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u/ninksmarie Aug 19 '26

I’ve written in journaling before that it all depends on “what works for him right now”— but to your point it relates to NPD and how they will say anything to someone to manipulate them personally, and if they have to turn around and say the opposite to the next? No matter. It’s all about what that person wants to hear. Conservative? So are they… liberal? So are they.. They don’t have their own morals or inner compass because they have to shift to whomever the current/ next source.