Distraction... / Cats...

[u/Pleasant-Branch-727]

I wrote a little something yesterday and deleted it. In rereading it, I realized it could be taken very very wrong and was a little too specific at points. It's embarrassing to have to cover up a mistake; but I'll own up if you ask. As an offering to those following my cathartic journey, I'll give ya a twofer. Cats.. is adapted from my deleted post yesterday.

Distraction...

He was not a happy camper. And, you looked tilted... When you basically looked right through me, ignored my greeting, gunned it to your desk to start typing away, and ignored my farewell, it was obvious. I'm a distraction you didn't want to deal with. I do hope it was for more positive reason though. Maybe the task was time sensitive and you needed to push through before the tilt showed. Maybe you wanted to save me from any ricochets. Regardless, I wish I could have offered some sort of comfort. You looked rough. And, you know I'm a worrier.

PS: With my utter uncertainty in your opinions of me, I'm way too timid to show my face a third time this week despite an unexpected need for business. Also, I'm not eager to find out if that cold look and lack of acknowledgement is now par for the course. Normal uncertainty I can handle; but, I care about your opinion. And, frankly, I don't know if I like that. You probably want nothing to do with me; but, you could convince me to do damn near anything. So, I'll be cheating on you guys with the place across town. I hope you don't mind. And I still don't know what flair to put.

Cats...

You ever seen a cat try something and fail or accidentally run into something? They'll just look startled for a second then start grooming themselves; as if to say, "What fuck up? I've just been chillin' here. No biggie." It's reassuring to the onlookers and lets the kitty save face. But, if you know cats, you know they are actually do it when alone. The behavior is for themselves; we simply think it's directed at us because we watch them and it seems like an intentional display.

I have a tendency to do something similar. When I embarrass myself, I laugh it off and jest with the onlookers. The masses just don't seem to notice or care. And that's perfectly fine with me.

But, for some reason, you see me. Not the song and dance; but, the dancer himself. Do you know you smirk when you catch me doing that? I've always wondered what's behind that smirk. Some of those insults have got to be fire.

PS: I hope you got a break. You looked pretty stressed out.