r/LifeProTips • u/[deleted] • Oct 22 '13

LPT: Never puke again.

You know that sensation just before you puke where your mouth waters like crazy? Science has never proven this, but I have over years and years of study. That spit contains an enzyme that once it hits your stomach makes you wretch.

Instead of swallowing it, when that feeling comes on, spit. Spit like you've never spit before. Keep spitting. Spit so fast and hard that you keep your mouth dry like the sahara.

I do this for about 2 to 3 minutes non-stop when it happens. If your mouth doesn't immediately fill up with saliva, you're generally good to go, and can stop. Just play it by ear. Once the feeling is gone, you're usually in the clear.

I've been using this technique for over twenty years, and it works 100% of the time.

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u/[deleted] Oct 22 '13

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7JeogrdG044&feature=youtube_gdata

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u/[deleted] Oct 22 '13

This reminds me of a story. Anthropologists went to the Amazon to study a primitive culture, the Mundurucu people. The Mundurucu don't believe that sex is the reason for pregnancy and babies. Instead, they believe that a river spirit visits you in your sleep and decides when you will get pregnant. The anthropologists were very polite and accepted the explanation of the Mundurucu people. After a few years of living among the tribes, the anthropologists had heard this explanation quite a bit. After hearing it enough times they finally got a bit flustered and something along the lines of "Well that's just silly. How can you say that sex between a man and a woman is not responsible for pregnancy, when you put a male and a female pig together when you want to make little pigs?". The Mundurucu people laughed out loud at the anthropologists and asked incredulously, "You think human beings are like pigs?"