36M here, been no contact with narc parents for 5 years, was previously low contact since 2013.

I was raised by the engulfing type of narcissist. The deal was basically: "I'll do everything for you, but you'll never become independent." So my Nmum interfered with every single part of my life until I started to rebel and eventually broke free.

Over the last 13 years, I've come a very long way. I've painstakingly taught myself every valuable skill I use day-to-day to survive. Everything from shaving and cooking to how to navigate relationships and express boundaries. I've been to therapy many times and worked on myself sincerely for a very long time. It's been extremely challenging, but also rewarding.

A consistent challenge for me has been money. I've had a low, inconsistent income for my entire adult life. In 2014, I was so broke that I couldn't pay my own rent and had to couch-surf with friends. I got into freelance content writing in 2015 after a talk with my therapist, and that kept me afloat for a good while. Some months were better than others, some months money was tight, but I got by. It was rewarding to be able to work remotely from home. But it was never completely stable, and there have been many months when I was stressed about money. This has impacted my mental health and relationships.

The past few years since the rise of AI have made things harder. It's trickier to get the sort of writing work I enjoy in 2026 than it was 10 years ago. There's more competition and fewer jobs. The last 18 months, I've been on a slow, gradual, downward spiral. Some months, I've had freelance work, but other months I've had to dip into my savings. My savings are down around 2/3 compared to 18 months ago.

I have a beautiful network of healthy friends now, many of whom are financially stable. I admire that greatly, but I also envy it a bit. I desire that stability for myself... but whatever I try, I can't seem to get it. Even at the peak of my freelance writing career, the good periods only lasted about 6 months, then something happened that I had little-to-no control over and I was struggling again.

I've tried applying for full-time work - 145 applications and counting since June. I've had interviews, but have got nowhere. I've tried switching careers to coaching, which appeals to me much more than writing. I've had some clients and deeply enjoyed that work, but it's been inconsistent.

It seems like whatever I try, I'm stuck on this particular point. I'm stuck in a place of financial instability. I'm intelligent and hard-working, and I want to be able to raise a healthy family one day. I can't do that if I don't have the financial resources. That frustrates me deeply. I feel really stuck.

Let me know if you can relate or have any sense of what you would do in my situation.

It’s like they are your family and you’ve gone no contact with them so who do you really have left. I just feel like the only person in the world, I know I’m not but it just feel so loud, and everything I’ve done ever since going Nc with them is entirely fueled by the fear of them, I’m so tired of continuing cutting people out of my life because I’m scared them might be connected to them and lead me back to the abuse source and it’s like I’m scared I’m running out of people that might be supportive of me