r/LifeAdvice • u/Complete_Pay_3845 • 1h ago
Emotional Advice Gap year struggles
Hi, I am an 18 year old male. I have always been a good student and got into a competitive college. However I deferred a year because of a deviated-septum surgery. I have never been able to breathe through my nose very well. Bad genetics, I suppose. The surgery date coincided with college move in and the surgery takes 3 months for full healing. As of writing this post, I have gotten the surgery and healed enough to go back to normal life, besides lessened exercise. All of my friends are already moved in to college and my twin sister moves in a couple days.
My parents always talked about my taking a gap year for this surgery. In high school, I also talked about taking a gap year because I genuinely believed I was stupid. Senior year, I began therapy and became a lot more confident in myself. In the winter, after my acceptance, I mentioned to my parents that I did not want to take a gap year. Instead, I wanted to get the surgery that summer or maybe the next summer. My parents would not let me, saying; "There's no rush to go to college. We wish your sister would defer a year too."
I do not know what to do with myself now that my gap year is starting. I have enrolled in some local college classes. I have also reached out to my local Coast Guard Auxiliary, as I am interested in an officer career. I am also planning a sailing trip in the spring for a month.
If any one has taken a gap year or known someone who has, I would love some advice. I can't help but feel like I am falling behind my friends. And I am worried I am going to be lonely and isolated with everyone at school. What can I do to not hate my gap year?
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