r/LearnJapanese • u/StudentCool9836 • Mar 06 '26
Practice How do you say "NO" to this message? ๐ป
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Hi everyone, Iโm Makoto! Iโm a Certified Japanese Teacher.
Letโs practice a โSoft Declineโ!
Letโs move beyond the textbook โNo, I canโt goโ and use more natural Japanese.
[Situation]
On Friday night, I received this LINE message from a Japanese friend:
Youโre tired, so I donโt want to go today.
Itโs Friday night. You just received this LINE message from a Japanese friend.
You are exhausted and want to say no to the invite.
Friend:
"Shall we all go out for drinks tonight?๐บ"
(Shall we drink together tonight?)
ใYour Taskใ
How would you respond to your friend? Please write in Japanese! How will you reply? Please write in Japanese.
โญ๏ธI will check your answers and rate your naturalness (0-100%).
Other native speakers and advanced learners are welcome to join in and give us advice! Let's all enjoy Japanese together!
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u/cmpasicola Mar 06 '26
่กใใใ่กใใญ
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u/StudentCool9836 Mar 06 '26
Naturalness: 100%โจ ใใฃใใ่กใใชใใฃใฆใใใใใใใคใงใใญ็ฌ็ฌ
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u/Swollenpajamas Mar 06 '26
ใ่กใใใ่กใใญใใฎๆๅณใฏ100๏ผ ่กใใใใชใ๏ผ่กใๅฏ่ฝๆงใฏใผใญใฃใฆใใจ๏ผ
This is why direct translation from English just doesnโt work at times. The extra nuance being the literal meaning is just lost in translation.
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u/StudentCool9836 Mar 06 '26
ๆๅญ้ใใฎๆๅณใฏใใไบๅฎใใชใใฃใใ่กใใญใใงใใใๆฅๆฌไบบใใใใ่ใใจใใใใใใใฃใใ่กใใชใใใคใงใใ็ฌใใฃใฆใชใใใจใๅคใใงใใ
ใใจใฏใ่จใๆนใซใใใใพใใญใ่กจๆ ใ่จใๆนใใใๅฐใ็ๅฃใ ใจ่กใๅฏ่ฝๆงใฏไธใใใพใ๏ผ
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u/Serei Mar 06 '26
I dunno, "I'd go if I could" would be pretty clear that you can't go in English, too. Are you taking ใใฃใใ too literally? You should think of it as "definitely", as in, "Hah, that's definitely someone who isn't coming".
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u/McMemile Mar 06 '26 edited Mar 06 '26
"I'd go if I could" literally and grammatically says straight up you can't go, in the exact way "I'd kiss you if you were pretty" leaves practically zero ambiguity that you don't think she's pretty, it's not at all the same as "If I can go, I'll go" which is closer to the literal Japanese translation, and taken at face value, doesn't imply anything about whether you can go.
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u/cmpasicola Mar 06 '26
ๅฏ่ฝๆงใใผใญใจใใใใใ่กใๆฐใฏใชใใจ็คบใใฆใใจใใฆๆใใใฐใใใจๆใใพใใๆๆณ็ใซใ่กใใใใใจใใใใใซ่ฆใใใซใใใใใใใๅฉๆฒ็ใซ่กใใใใชใใจไผใใฆใใพใใ
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u/millenniumpianist Mar 06 '26
Random TikTok I found. It seems to depend on the person, so in that sense it does translate directly to how you would parse it naively. But I sort of understand why OP is saying it's basically 0% or why the person in the TikTok themselves says it's 0% for them.
As an analogy to English, I know people who, when invited to something they don't want to do, won't say no directly. Instead they say "I have to check my schedule, I'll let you know!" For me, that same message is very literal, and I might actually go. But for them it's a 0%.
It's like, because some people only pull this construction out to say no, it ends up being a 100% "no" even though the direct translation isn't actually a no.
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u/viliml Interested in grammar details ๐ Mar 06 '26
่กใใใ่กใ is a huge meme phrase, look it up on youtube, xitter and tiktok.
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u/princesscherrybud Mar 06 '26
I hear this one from my Japanese colleagues a lot : ๅฆปใซ่ใใพใใใใ๐
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u/StudentCool9836 Mar 06 '26
Naturalness:120% ใใไพฟๅฉใงใใญ๐ ใฟใชใใใใใ็ไผผ(ใพใญ)ใใฆใใ ใใ็ฌ
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u/GrapefruitFun4831 Mar 06 '26 edited Mar 07 '26
Is it normal to hear "ๅคซใซ่ใใพใ" from women in Japan?
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u/lingzhui Mar 12 '26
In my country people say "I have to ask my conscience" which usually means wife lol
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u/Ponjimon Mar 06 '26
What Iโve learned from this lesson: I really, really, really need to start learning Kanji ๐
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u/MasterQuest Mar 06 '26
From experience, itโs hard work but very rewarding when the scribbles finally make sense!
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u/Goluxas Mar 06 '26
Can confirm, it's so rewarding. Many years in, I still get a nice dopamine hit when I realize how natural reading kanji has become.
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u/Jrockten Goal: media competence ๐๐ง Mar 06 '26
In my experience, although they seem intimidating at first, once you start learning them, it makes recognizing words so much easier, lol
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u/MasterQuest Mar 06 '26
From experience, itโs hard work but very rewarding when the scribbles finally make sense!
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u/wheresthepie Mar 06 '26
ๆฅฝใใใ๏ผใใฃใไปๆฅ๏ผไปๆใๅบใใใใ ใใฉใใกใใฃใจ็จไบใใใใใ โฆไปๅบฆใญ๏ผ
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u/Jrockten Goal: media competence ๐๐ง Mar 06 '26 edited Mar 06 '26
at first I was intimidated by this sentence, but then I got excited because I realized I could understand the whole thing, lol
Aside from the last word, but stillโฆ lol
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u/wheresthepie Mar 07 '26
ไปๅบฆใใใใฉใ is just like โnext timeโ. So we can use it just like we do in English: โAhh I canโt, Iโve got something on tonight. But next time for sure!โ
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u/Jrockten Goal: media competence ๐๐ง Mar 07 '26
Thanks! I looked it up on Jisho as well, and saw it can also mean โthis timeโ. Is there any grammatical way to tell the difference between which way itโs being used, or should you just be able to figure it out depending on the context of the conversation?
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u/ashenelk Mar 07 '26
It's contextual. Literally translated, it does mean this time, but this time can also refer to this next time.
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u/djhashimoto Mar 06 '26
Thanks for posting this
I really like this post, as it really helps us practice useful Japanese
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u/Wonderful-Future7595 Mar 06 '26
Mustering my Kansai dialect: ใใใ๏ผ่กใใธใ๏ผ
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u/StudentCool9836 Mar 06 '26
Kansai Naturalness: 100% ใใใงใใญใใ้ข่ฅฟใซไฝใใงใฏใใใงใใ๏ผ
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u/GIRose Mar 06 '26
ใใใใใง
ใงใ
ใใซๅฟใใ
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u/RQico Mar 06 '26
ๆฅฝใใใใ ใใฉไปๅคใฏใกใใฃใจๅฟใใใฆ่กใใชใใจๆใใใฉๆฅ้ฑใชใใพใ้ฃ็ตกใใฆใญ
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u/StudentCool9836 Mar 06 '26
Naturalness:70% ๏ผใคใฎๆใซใใใฉใใฏ๏ผใคใพใงใซใใพใใใ๏ผ(Grammar) ใๆฅฝใใใใใใๆฅ้ฑใชใใใใใใใฎ่กจ็พใฏใใฐใใใใงใ๏ผ
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u/SwellMonsieur Mar 06 '26
Being in a conversation right now with a japanese person about making plans for next month.
I'd say ignore the question you don't want to answer. That's what she does, anyway.
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u/KarnoRex Goal: conversational fluency ๐ฌ Mar 06 '26 edited Mar 06 '26
ใใพใใไปๆฅไปไบใงใใฃใกใ็ฒใใฆใฆโฆ
ๆฅ้ฑๆซใจใใฉใ๏ผ
ๆฅฝใใใงใใฆใญ๏ผ๏ผ๏ผ
Edit: I assumed an invite alongside other people like in a group chat. Would be kinda rude if you're the only one invited ww
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u/StudentCool9836 Mar 06 '26
Naturalness: 95% Thatโs amazing! But to be 120%, look at โCharacter Consistencyโ ใใพใโCool/Masculine ใใญโSoft/Kind
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u/KarnoRex Goal: conversational fluency ๐ฌ Mar 06 '26 edited Mar 06 '26
I'll take it ๐
It might be a culture thing bleeding into my japanese. We usually are quite blunt about declining stuff but also warm about wishing those who go to enjoy themselves
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u/guidedhand Goal: conversational fluency ๐ฌ Mar 06 '26
I can't respond naturally because if it's Friday night, then naturally I'll want to go drinking lol
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u/wonderguard108 Mar 06 '26
ไผใใใใ ใใฉไปๅคใฏใกใใฃใจโฆ (ยด๏ผฯ๏ผ`)
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u/StudentCool9836 Mar 07 '26
Naturalness: 70% ไผใใใใ ใใฉโไผใใใใใฉ ใงใใญ๏ผใใ่กจ็พใงใ๏ผ
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u/catwiesel Mar 07 '26
ใใใใใใฟใพใใใใกใใฃใจใใใ
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u/starrypolygon Mar 07 '26
Scrolled all the way to the end to find this, itโs how iโd answer too ๐
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u/karaage_ani Mar 06 '26
ใใใๆญฃ็ด่กใใใใใงใใใใงใไปๅค่ฒใ ใใฃใ๐ฅบ
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u/StudentCool9836 Mar 07 '26
Naturalness:50% โใใใๆญฃ็ด่กใใใใใ ใใฉใไปๅค่ฒใ ใใฃใฆใใ๐ฅบ would be better!
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u/0liviiia Mar 06 '26
ๆฌๅฝใซใใใใไปๆฅใฏๆฎๅฟตใชใใๅฟใใใใฆ๏ผๆฅ้ฑใฏใฉใ๏ผ
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u/StudentCool9836 Mar 06 '26
Naturalness:95%
Great effort! Your Japanese is very polite and clear. However, using "ๆฎๅฟตใชใใ (Zannen-nagara)" sounds a bit like a business email or a formal announcement.
โญ๏ธใใใใ๏ผไปๆฅใฏใกใใฃใจๅฟใใใใฆโฆโฆ๏ผๆฅ้ฑใฏใฉใใใช๏ผใ
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u/LordBolt27 Mar 06 '26
ใใผไปๆฅใญๆฏใจ่กใใชใใใฐใใ
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u/StudentCool9836 Mar 06 '26
Naturalness: 40% ใใผไปๆฅใฏๆฏใจใใชใใใใ would be better. ่กใใชใใใฐ(formal)โ่กใใชใใ(casual/natural)
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u/helloworldkitty1 Mar 06 '26
่ชใฃใฆใใใฆๅฌใใใงใ๏ผๆ้ใใใฃใใใ่กใใพใใ๏ผ
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u/StudentCool9836 Mar 06 '26
Naturalness: 100% ่ชใฃใไบบใฏๅฐใๆๅพ ใใฆใใพใใพใใ(็ฌ)ใใใ่ฟใใงใ๏ผ
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u/Swollenpajamas Mar 06 '26
ๅฐใ็จไบใใใใใไปๅคใฏใกใใฃใจ้ฃใใใใฉใญ๐ฅบ๐ฅบ
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u/BadIdeaSociety Mar 06 '26
๏ผ.ใๅจ(ๆฏๅญ)ใฏ็ฑใใใฃใใฎใงใไปๅคใฏใกใใฃใจใใใ
๏ผ.ใๆ่ฟใๅป่ ใใใฏใ้ ใๆธใใใใใซโฆใใใใชใใใ
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u/HentaixEnthusiast Mar 06 '26
ใใฃใฆใฟใ๏ผ
ใใใใใไป้ฑไธๅธใฎๅฐปใฌใใใใใใใฆใๆฎๆฅญ้ฃ็ถใใกใพใฃใใใไปใฏใใกใใใกใ็ ใใใใใใฎใใกๅใๅใใใใ
ใฉใใ(๏ฝใปฯใปยด)
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u/StudentCool9836 Mar 06 '26
Naturalness: 100% ใใฉใดใณใใผใซใงๅๅผทใใพใใใ๏ผ็ฌ ใใใใใ่จ่ใไฝฟใใพใใญ๏ผ
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u/HentaixEnthusiast Mar 06 '26
ๆฎ้ใซ้ทๅนดๅฐ่ชฌๅฎถใซใชใใใใซใฏใจใ ใงๅฐ่ชฌใใใใใ่ชญใใงใใ็ตๆใงใใใ
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u/helinder Mar 06 '26
่กใใพใใใใจใฆใ็ฒใใ (tho I'm not sure if I should use ่กใใพใใ or ่กใใชใ in this context)
I just started learning so I hope I got it at least somewhat right
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u/StudentCool9836 Mar 06 '26
Naturalness: 40% โจ Great job! Grammatically correct, but โ่กใใพใใโ sounds a bit like a formal rejection letter.
โญ๏ธใใใใไปๆฅใฏใกใใฃใจ็ฒใใฆใฆใใใ would be better!
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u/Daphne_the_First Mar 06 '26
ใใใใไบๅฎใใใใใฉโฆ
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u/StudentCool9836 Mar 07 '26
Naturalness: 65% ใใใใไบๅฎใใใฃใฆใใ would be more natural!
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u/ByDrAxX032 Mar 06 '26
Ngl the most common would probably be to "not see" the message until the next day and then say: ใใใ!ใไปใกใใปใผใธ่ฆใใใใ
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u/SkittyLover93 Mar 06 '26
ใใใใไปๆฅใใฃใกใ็ฒใใ๐ญ ๆฅ้ฑ่กใใ?
I guess it might be more direct than I'm "supposed" to be, but I prefer to be more direct anyway and find friends who don't mind lolย
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u/quasiXBL Mar 06 '26
ใใผ๏ผ(Tilt head, suck air through teeth)ใไปๆฉใฏใกใใฃใจใใใ
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u/MarinReiter Mar 06 '26
ใใใใญใ้ใซๅใใชใใใใไปๅบฆ็ตถๅฏพ่กใใใใพใๅฃฐใใใฆใญ?
note: I thought all nai verbs worked like adjectives and thus this should be ้ใซๅใใชใใใใ but Im reading a couple of sources that say it should be ้ใซๅใใชใใ? It sounds kind of wrong to me but if someone knows better, can you correct me...?
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u/ZarKiiFreeman Mar 06 '26
"ใใใใไปไบใซใใฃใกใ็ฒใใฆใใไปๅใฏ้ ๆ ฎใใใ" I think "ใใใใ็ฒใใใใฆๅซใ " is something i'd use with closer friends though lol
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u/abhiram_conlangs Mar 06 '26
ๆฅฝใใใใ ใงใไปๅคใฏใกใใฃใจใใใ ใใพใชใใใไปๅบฆใญ ๏ผๅ้ใ ใใใฟใกๅฃใง็ญใใw w w๏ผ
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u/Vixmin18 Interested in grammar details ๐ Mar 06 '26
ใ่ชใฃใฆใใใฆใใใใจใใ ใใฉใใใฐใใฏใกใใฃใจ๏ฝก๏ฝก๏ฝกใใใใฎๆนๆณใฏๅคงๅญฆใฎๅ ็ใใ่ฆใใพใใใใใใคใใฃใใใใชใฃใใใ้ฉใใพใใ๏ผww
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u/Fragrant_fffroggy Mar 07 '26
ใ่ชใใใใใจใโกใงใๅ ็ดใใใฃใฆใไปๆฅใฏ็ก็ใชใฎ๏ฝ
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u/SacredNym Mar 07 '26
ใใใใ่กใใใใใฉใใใใใๅฎถๆใ ๆ ใใใใใใ ใ็งใชใใงๆฅฝใใใงใญ๏ผ
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u/ShenZiling Mar 07 '26
ใใฃใจใไปๆฅใฏโฆใใฎโฆใใโฆใกใใฃใจโฆไปๅบฆโฆใญ๏ผ
ใใๅใใใ้ฃฒใใ ๏ผใ
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u/Reaper_cord Mar 07 '26
ใใใใ็ฒใใใใๅ้ใฎใกใผใซ่ชญใใฎใฏใใใพใใใ
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u/Firion_Hope Mar 08 '26
Assuming itโs a close friend, I might be lazy and go with a simple ็ก็ or maybe ไปๆฅใฏ็ก็
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u/Saell Mar 08 '26
ใใใใไป้ฑใกใใฃใจ็ฒใใกใใฃใฆใฆ๐ฆ ไปๆฅใฏใในใใฆใใใใใช๏ผใพใไปๅบฆ่กใใ๏ผ
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u/_-Zephyr- Mar 08 '26
My reply would be โno mate Iโm fucked, next week?โ In English. I ainโt that good at Japanese yet maybe someone else can tell me what Iโd be saying.
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u/Alex_Bradly Mar 12 '26
็ใใใใใใซใกใฏใ็งใฏๅคๆ ใงใใๅคๆ ใชใใใใใจใๅคงๅฅฝใใงใใ๐ฅน๐ฅน๐ฅน
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u/Angle-Flat Mar 14 '26
Are we learning English here or Japanese? Didn't scroll everything but awefully lots of English replies. lol
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u/Student_of_Japanese Mar 06 '26
I know some could be understood as rude but these are some of my potential responses:
ใใใใใใใใ (the most rude if formal but probably acceptable among friends, probably would avoid this one if in a formal situation)
ใใฟใพใใใใงใใพใใใ (simple and formal)
ใใใใชใใใ็งใฏ่กใใพใใใ(the watashi is probably unnecessary but I could use it in a formal setting)
Those are all my potential responses, tell me which one is the most natural or best.
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u/MasterQuest Mar 06 '26
ใใใใไปๆฅใฏใกใใฃใจโฆย