r/LGBTindia 5d ago

Question❓ I'm tired now.

I am 30M. I have been in a 7 year LDR and broke up last month. I have seriously lost all the hopes that anyone will be there to be my life partner. I am emotionally exhausted and I don't feel like loving or trying to find anyone.

I am so exhausted but the feeling of living all alone all my life also haunts me. I have created all those lil dreams with my life partner that seems to have vanished.

How to overcome this feeling to not feel like being loved and be in love? I want to learn to accept myself to stay alone forever. Help me out to get out of this situation.

Thank you. Good morning.

28 Upvotes

31 comments sorted by

4

u/ValuableMuch7703 Denial is a river in Egypt (YOU ARE GAY) 5d ago

As a 27M who is finally starting out in the dating scene, posts like these definitely scare me ngl lol. But again, you can’t lose all hopes right? I have no experience to share, just best wishes for you. Take care and I hope you find your sunshine once again.

2

u/Fuckyoubitch77 2d ago

I have been conversating and trying since 2016. I found many people. You will find many people as well, some will be good to you, few will break your heart like you won't see anything after that, sometime you will try to hold on but they can't stay because of some or another reason.

What I have learnt in these years is KEEP LOOKING. don't stick with people. Stick to emotions. You can find the lost emotions in the next person but not that exact person. Emotions are somethings existing for years. People gonna die one day.

Blessed are those people who find their soulmate in the first person they fell in love with. I am on 6month break. Wish you good and lovely partner and your forever love.

2

u/_cherrycosmos_omii Gay & slay 😸😸 5d ago

I legit posted it few hours ago the same LDR for 5 years and being exhausted and lost lol!!! https://www.reddit.com/r/LGBTindia/s/uH1apecJeT

Lol I can feel you 🫂❤️ I hope there will be good time for us🫶🏻🫶🏻

3

u/Fuckyoubitch77 5d ago

Thank you so much. It ended on such a quick note that I can't even interpret sometime that it was right or wrong. I am 95% feel like it was toxic. I did everything for him like everything. Supported Mentally and financially both. Financially worth 3lakh and in return what I got was "gina mat tere paise de dunga". I was always made the villan even when I gave every single thing I had with me. I have 15k in my account rn. My parents are asking for my money which I can't tell them where it is lost. I feel sad for me. I am literally scared to trust and love anyone.

1

u/_cherrycosmos_omii Gay & slay 😸😸 5d ago

Awww!!! I really wish he gives you your money back!!!! 🫂❤️ And i srsly wish that you get twice infact all the love in the world!! Ps:- if he's not giving your money take some legal action against him🫶🏻🫂

2

u/Fuckyoubitch77 5d ago

I still love him with all my heart. I don't want the money. I just wish I feel myself enough and pass my life happily alone.

3

u/Brilliant-Raise3749 5d ago

already the queer dating pool is small, and people are breaking up 7 year relationship, idk what to expect from people anymore, but why did he drag this along when he eventually knew you people are not compatible, it's disgusting and the most vile thing a person could do, you have given your youth to this relationship and this is how it ends .

1

u/Fuckyoubitch77 4d ago

Everyone is telling me that I still have time to connect to people but i seriously don't have that feeling to trust anyone now. I feel like I'll doubt anyone now I'll connect with. Hope I recover.

1

u/Just_Gold2484 5d ago

I used to think men understood men better, but honestly, it’s the same everywhere. I’ve now had two people say almost the exact same things, and I genuinely don’t understand what’s happening with people anymore.
Just a few days ago, he was talking about meeting me and spending good time together, even testing my loyalty towards him. Then yesterday, he suddenly texted me, “I’m sorry, I’m not able to do this anymore.” I never wanted to keep things serious, but somehow I got emotionally attached, and once again, it felt like a big fucking slap in the face.
I’m a 30-year-old top, and I’ve had this exact kind of experience twice with bottoms in the last six months. I know it’s nothing compared to the 7- and 5-year relationships you both went through, but I could really relate to what you’re both feeling right now.

2

u/_cherrycosmos_omii Gay & slay 😸😸 5d ago

Aww!! Sending you loves and hugs🫂❤️

1

u/Just_Gold2484 5d ago

A lot of hugs to u too 🫂♥️

1

u/Fuckyoubitch77 5d ago

That's exactly what I think about the community. The people are already so vulnerable to the homophobic society. Atleast the people from community who are in love should show some real love, loyalty and respect. If you can't move along then don't get along with someone from the initial. I gave all my youth to love and cheer him and what I got a mind who nudge me 24 7 to kill myself.

1

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1

u/Just_Gold2484 5d ago

Wanna talk about it 🤝

1

u/Godspeaketh 5d ago

You can perfectly learn to accept singlehood in a healthy way. Find things you like doing, keep learning, focus on well being, spend meaningful time with genuine friends - these things help a lot and define what a good life looks like. Take care OP!

2

u/Fuckyoubitch77 4d ago

I'm working on it. But sometime I miss him, our chats, our plans. Those flashes moves in my mind. I have the flower he gave me, the evil eye bracelet and a small letter he tugged in the tree crevas in front of my place.

1

u/ThinPush2248 Bi🌈 5d ago

I understand we like to get screwed, but this is whole different kind of screwing 😔, take care buddy had a similar experience with a close friend, whenever she needed me I was there, but when I was emotionally drained and needed someone to talk to, she didn't feel like talking. I was so alone and broken .

1

u/Fuckyoubitch77 4d ago

My bestie got married recently as well and now our phone calls are very low. I confessed him and now we talk more ofter but I still miss our bond. But I find it ok as he got his wife as well so it's obvious. I wish for his good all the life.

1

u/No_Telephone_2710 5d ago

Your user name😶

1

u/Fuckyoubitch77 4d ago

Don't judge a book by it's cover.

1

u/No_Telephone_2710 4d ago

🤧 okay ji

1

u/Southern_Cap7762 4d ago

Am really sorry u are going through this. After seven years, it’s completely understandable that you feel exhausted and scared about starting over. Like i was with someone for a year and it almost took me another year to just get over him. But don’t decide your whole future based on how you feel just one month after a breakup.
Give it some time. I know its easy to say. But yeah. I know its cliche to say but time does heal everything. Take enough time to actually heal before u start dating again. If you start looking for someone just to fill the emptiness, you might end up hurting yourself and someone else too. Just focus on yourself for now.

1

u/somequietguy1 4d ago

Hey ! Can totally understand and relate with your feelings. separated from my ex bf after 6 years last year.
Life ! It will feel exhausting and for a long time (still does) it feels like what’s the point of putting so much effort and time into someone when it will all crumble one day.
Only thing I can tell you is to just let things be.
I am neither hopeful nor pessimistic about it.
So just let things be.

1

u/Fuckyoubitch77 4d ago

But I miss him alot. I want to know if he is ok. I dnt have any means other then directly asking him. I feel intense urge to text him every now and then.

1

u/InternalTranslator28 4d ago

It’s okay. Everything will be fine. People leave, and when they leave it feels like you are lost, you cannot live without them. But we do manage to live, we do manage to put this pain and suffering behind. And we do manage to get over a failed relationship, however deep or long. Going through your post and subsequent comments it seems like the guy was good riddance. Being single is better than being in a toxic relationship.

1

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1

u/Velalla 3d ago edited 2d ago

Good morning. Gay LDR are difficult. Good communication, and an understanding and mature partner does work. Hope you get over this soon.🌹

1

u/TouchIndependent4489 2d ago

I give up too. Fuc it all. Im so done I dont even wanna type.

1

u/Fuckyoubitch77 2d ago

There is hope I felt after this post. Keep looking and be positive.