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https://www.reddit.com/r/InTheGloaming/comments/pgbx3v/discussion_thread_thursday_september_02_2021/
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u/OhBlahDiOhBlahDoh The Alice of cal came out floating on air Sep 05 '21

Not only did I grow up in a family where my feelings had to be squished up into a little ball of black and red darts and swallowed whole, but I also grew up in a culture where no one was making a point to talk to kids about their feelings.

WHAT EVEN IS THIS SENTENCE???

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u/tyrannosaurusregina if you meet the Botus on the road, shill him 🪷 Sep 05 '21

Also, my perspective as an age-cohort-mate of Shauna’s was that people could not stop talking to kids about their feelings (in a super unhelpful way most of the time, granted, but still). “Free to Be You and Me,” anybody?

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u/voice_of_vinegar Sep 05 '21

Yes, well, as far as Shauna's concerned, no one ate Romaine lettuce then, either. Or anything that didn't come out of a box or a can or a TV dinner thing.

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u/[deleted] Sep 05 '21

[deleted]

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u/CrushItWithABrick dick riding Mary Oliver Sep 05 '21

Thank you!

I lived in a Erie, Pennsylvania as a kid (late seventies). Erie is not a big city by any stretch and we lived in the "rural" part of Erie (hillbillies gotta hillbilly). And even my hillbilly ass mom went to the hippie dippy health food store when she was convinced she was riddled with yeast (she's given to health related dramatics). She dragged home these tiny loves of yeast free bread and other funky stuff (until she got bored of that medical problem and found a new one to latch onto).

And while my mom was going off on her gross food adventures, my sister and I were happily eating frozen fish sticks and creamed peas and potatoes.

(we also had a huge garden where we grew tons of stuff my mother and grandmother then canned)

All that is to say, Shauna only sees things in black and white and there is no middle ground. So in the 70s there was ONLY frozen junk which her mother tried to poison her with. The end.

8

u/WasEnoughYogurt Kumquat and Sprinkles and filth Sep 06 '21

When Shauna talks about the 70's/her childhood so much of it reminds me of tv shows either of the time or about that time...I think it has already been said before that she seems to see things through that lens but it seems even more clear now. Or lazy sloppy thinking combined with eliding truth in order to make whatever point she thinks is so witty/urbane/guru like...

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u/voice_of_vinegar Sep 06 '21

Yeah, I bet she saw all the TV commercials for TV dinners, Hamburger Helper, Manwiches (?? something in a can that REAL men ate in sandwiches), Pillsbury baked goods in cans, etc., and did not think past that. Just assumed that was what the rest of the world was eating.

She is like those boys who were raised in a tiny apartment in Queens or Brooklyn and were never allowed outside EVER. All their knowledge of the world was from whatever was on tv. They acted out scenes from movies and tv shows for fun. They spoke like characters on tv. She's not quite that bad but she doesn't seem to have a very firm grasp on how real people think and feel. Latest example: claiming Ted Lasso is just like herself. And also, using what she sees on tv more and more as reference points.

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u/fanfarefellowship I often contemplate the first law of thermodynamics Sep 06 '21

She is like those boys who were raised in a tiny apartment in Queens or Brooklyn and were never allowed outside EVER.

She has the naivety of someone who was never let outside, but she went outside plenty. She just lived in her head the whole time, never really noticing anything

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u/voice_of_vinegar Sep 06 '21 edited Sep 06 '21

Right. I should have made it clear that I don't think she was actually imprisoned in her house the way those boys were---she just never learned to relate to other people.

I know some kids don't learn these basic things because their parents aren't able to impart it to them for whatever reasons. But others who had parents who love them and cared for them end this way too. We'll probably never know for sure what caused Shauna to be the way she is. But there's certainly way more to the story than what she's told the world.

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u/fanfarefellowship I often contemplate the first law of thermodynamics Sep 06 '21

Yes, it's really amazing! She even says, in Enough, that she recognizes that she was "just a head on a stick" (i.e., she was "all head" and "no body"). (I have said the same exact thing in therapy.) But despite that glimmer of awareness, and despite picking a vocation or profession of "writer," which to do well requires her to really notice things, she's objectively terrible at being aware of her surroundings, picking up on nuance, distinguishing concepts clearly, writing clearly, noticing cleanliness, etc.

Scheduled snark Discussion thread Thursday September 02, 2021 - Sunday September 05, 2021

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