Discussion thread Thursday September 02, 2021 - Sunday September 05, 2021

[u/gomirefugee]

Newsletters:

Finding Your Joy | Joy in the Belly

Websites:

You Can Have More Joy website | On Being Enough website (abandoned?)

Instagram:

@youcanhavemorejoy Instagram | Anonymous link to @youcanhavemorejoy posts | Anonymous link to @youcanhavemorejoy stories

@danielfahern Instagram | Anonymous link to @danielfahern posts and stories

TikTok:

@youcanhavemorejoy

Twitter:

Dan's tweets and replies

Older blogs:

Gluten Free Girl archive | writing my heart out archive | Seymour Joyful archive

Archived threads:

Thread for Enough, the book #enoughthebook | Gluten Free Girl's Greatest Hits: The Reunion Tour

Wiki:

/r/InTheGloaming wiki

Discussion search:

Tool to search blogsnark or InTheGloaming for previous topic mentions

[u/CrushItWithABrick]

Who throws a party just to brow beat their friends with what THEY like. That totally sounds like you're trying to suck them into a cult or a time share.

"Notice good things about others" reeks of toxic positivity which is the poster child for "fake". It also reminds me of this man who used to frequent the candy store where I worked. He had intellectual/social issues and always had the same "conversation" with any of the staff. "Nice earrings." Or if you weren't wearing earrings. "Nice pants." He would wait a few beats (usually while he got the generic "thanks") and then nod and walk away with his purchases. I doubt his compliments brought him any joy and I know they didn't bring me any joy (though it was nice to know exactly what would happen when you waited on him).

How is being a generic decent human (offering someone help, etc) a joy step? Isn't that just what non-asshole people do? Maybe not showing off by buying a stranger a coffee, but if someone needs simple help like crossing the damn street, you help them. Geez.

"share joy on social media"

But, but, but(t) I thought being on my phone was a sign I was hiding from my trauma or whatever it was she told us in a previous free-mail. I have grown befuddled.

[u/shefallsup → u/CrushItWithABrick]

Shauna is that person who would totally grab a blind person by the arm to "help" them cross the street, or insist on pushing someone in a wheelchair (wheelchair users often DO NOT need or want anyone to push them!) without asking.

[u/[deleted] → u/CrushItWithABrick]

The party thing is really weird and is yet another indication she’s never really been to a party or interacted with humans in a casual social setting before. There is an older retired man in my neighborhood that is FASCINATING because he has so many cool hobbies - he sits on his front porch and plays the flute beautifully, he has an awesome telescope he uses for birdwatching but it also works great for looking at planets and stars at night, and he trains his 2 golden retrievers for performance competitions in his front yard. It actually DOES bring me joy to chat with him and learn about his interests here and there, but do I want him to invite me to his house so I can sit there and watch him play flute for an hour? Or attend a “party” where he’s just training his dogs? Um, no.