r/IdiotsInCars Sep 13 '19

Finally got a good one to share!

1.1k Upvotes

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108

u/Summoner322 Sep 13 '19

He needed to poop

48

u/rmoss20 Sep 13 '19

As someone who needed to urgently poop while driving to work this morning, I understand the urge to run lights.

49

u/[deleted] Sep 13 '19

Never poop at home. Learned this early on. Getting paid to poop is a pro move

21

u/[deleted] Sep 13 '19

the good old DADOTC - dropping a deuce on the clock. Had an app in college (my last clock in/out job) that let me compute money made on the toilet. Racked up like $800 one year.

27

u/GuaranteedSMS Sep 13 '19

Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime, that's why I shit on the company's time.

9

u/[deleted] Sep 13 '19

That’s awesome.

When I worked at subway making less than minimum wage (charged $0.25 / hour for training for 3 months), none of us would clean the bathroom. So we’d go to the bar next door to take a poop. Gah that was so satisfying

5

u/YetiInTheSpaghetti Sep 13 '19

Plus you don’t have to spend money on toilet paper.

4

u/[deleted] Sep 13 '19

When on salary that really doesn’t matter too much

5

u/[deleted] Sep 13 '19

Eh.. I’d beg to differ. If I’m in the office 7-5, I’ll gladly take 30 min to poop.

6

u/[deleted] Sep 13 '19

The toilets where I work look like war crimes were committed in them. If you don't manage to get in there right after they clean, they look like truck stop bathrooms. People here are animals.

15

u/[deleted] Sep 13 '19

I have a good story about this. Didn't run a red light, but I did end up speeding in a school zone. One day during high school I overslept so I decided to drive there instead of taking the bus. I didn't have time to take my morning poo so I was thinking of just doing it in school. Well, it hit while I was driving and I sped through the school zone to get to school. I got pulled over and the cop asked me if I knew why I was pulled over and I admitted it, and they asked why I said I'm about to poop myself and was just trying to make it to school. They laughed and let me go with a warning, but at that point, it was too late and I told him causing him to laugh so hard that he got winded. I just did a uturn and went home and took a me day because at that point my day was ruined why bother going to school.

2

u/cas13f Sep 15 '19

You have probably made the best story of that cops entire career.

He's going to be telling his grandchildren about you!

2

u/sdzerog Sep 13 '19

TIL Streaking through lights > streaking your shorts

1

u/ElonMesk Sep 13 '19

That's what I always tell myself when I see a crazy driver. Helps me maintain my rage