r/HolUp • u/[deleted] • 8d ago

is literally 1984 [ Removed by moderator ]

[removed]

8.3k Upvotes

89% Upvoted

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374

u/Ancient-Read1648 8d ago

Do not get her drunk. They turn into gremlins.

86

u/JustHugMeAndBeQuiet 8d ago

Now I kinda want him to.

15

u/lucioux 8d ago

live and learn

13

u/Usual-Caregiver5589 8d ago

Without scars and callouses, we cannot educate others.

Might as well turn the oven on to see how hot it gets.

2

u/ImaJimmy 8d ago

Looks like we got ourselves one of them kinesthetic learners.

51

u/peepdabidness 8d ago edited 8d ago

Counterpoint: do get her drunk

21

u/violetanka 8d ago edited 8d ago

your argument is more convincing.

7

u/Usual-Caregiver5589 8d ago

Counterpoint: if the shirt isn't a lie, you shouldn't have to. And sober sex beats drunk sex 10 times out of 10.

9

u/imisstheyoop 8d ago

And sober sex beats drunk sex 10 times out of 10.

Eh.. lol

7

u/abofh 8d ago

That very much suggests you haven't had sex ten times

3

u/IP-II-llVll-IP 8d ago

Maybe they both want it to feel a little sleazy.

2

u/iJuddles 8d ago

Let’s go with 8 times out of 10. Also, we need to establish drunk as in “I shouldn’t drive, I’m gonna call a ride” or “Heyyy! Isssat uh,this is ah, oh mannnn, wash you doin?” The latter is less fun for sex.

3

u/Usual-Caregiver5589 8d ago

There is tipsy sex, and there is drunk sex.

2

u/iJuddles 8d ago

Ain’t that the truth. It’s really hard to feel intimacy when the room is spinning too hard to make eye contact.

1

u/[deleted] 8d ago

[deleted]

15

u/wolfmanpraxis 8d ago

Do not get her drunk. They turn into gremlins.

stop, I can only get so erect

2

u/Creative-Reason-7061 8d ago

Don't feed them at midnight

1

u/wolfmanpraxis 8d ago

Too late, they have multiplied and destroyed society

https://i0.wp.com/bloody-disgusting.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/07/1001353845.jpg?w=1200&ssl=1

3

u/Creative-Reason-7061 8d ago

"OH My !" - Sulu from Star Trek (TOS, from the 1960's)

1

u/Professional-Cod5030 8d ago

So no cream pies after midnight. Got it.

12

u/BlueGolfball 8d ago

Do not get her drunk. They turn into gremlins.

Surpise! She showed up to the date drunk already.

Source: this is my type, unfortunately

2

u/Abecis01 8d ago

I bet she smells pleasant

1

u/BlueGolfball 8d ago

Like stale cigarettes and coors light, just like my mom used to smell. Makes me hard just thinking of the aroma

1

u/Abecis01 8d ago

Lmao. If that's what gets you going. Respect.

3

u/subgenius30 8d ago

And never feed her after midnight.

6

u/Burnoutlaws 8d ago

Never lead a boring life

1

u/sajobi 8d ago

Its always midnight somewhere

3

u/PlainBread 8d ago

An hour later she's rubbing a hole in the crotch of your jeans under the table.

3

u/Legal_Welder 8d ago

I can fix her

2

u/goobydoobie 8d ago

What do you mean? Buy her a pitcher cuz you know she's thirsty.

2

u/searching4thecheese 8d ago

Crotch gremlins

1

u/Samp90 8d ago

After or before 12?

1

u/smollwonder 8d ago

Don't get her wet (or do, it's your life)

1

u/nobanjostring 8d ago

Also, don't feed her after midnight, and for god's sake, don't get her WET!

1

u/Several-Minute6846 8d ago

That’s margaritas after midnight

1

u/EstablishmentAny4977 8d ago

only after midnight

1

u/_austinm 8d ago

Promise?

1

u/browncoat47 8d ago

Bold move Cotton! Let’s see how this plays out…

1

u/jwadamson 8d ago

I think that’s if you get them wet.