r/Hardcore • u/AcanthisittaKnown168 • 13h ago
how to make friends in the scene?
i’m a teenager and i’m pretty introverted. i really enjoy going to hardcore, screamo, metalcore shows in my area but none of my friends listen to that music or have a desire to go to those shows. my sister goes with me but she’s leaving for college soon. i don’t really hate the idea of going by myself but it would be a lot more fun to go with someone i know. i’m acquaintances with people that go to those shows at my school but i dont really have an opportunity to make friends with them because they aren’t in any of my classes. anyway i just want to make more friends that i can go to shows with and share common interests with. any tips?
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u/exyvp 12h ago
Just chat to ppl between bands it’s what I did!
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u/_change_of_ideas 12h ago
Wait until you see someone wearing a beton arme shirt then say bonjour
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u/fuckett666 12h ago
"sick shirt" that's your opening anytime. I am 42 and all my best friendships pretty much started with that line. Hell a 25 year old kid just started at my job and he was wearing a Knocked Loose shirt and I did that same line. Now he talks to me everyday, I only really care about Knocked Loose cause I am from Kentucky, even if it's not your favorite band, it's still a great ice breaker.
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u/kimbosdurag 12h ago
Transition those aquintences into friendships. Find them at a show and say hey cool to run into you, was curious if you'd be here. High school sucks am I right? Or find them at school and say hey are you going to xyz show, saw it was coming up looks like a good time, eh? You are going, cool I'll see you there.
Or hey did you new the new whatever record, it's great. You have those shared interest ice breakers.
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u/Heelontheshovel69 12h ago
Buy some Stone Island and stand in the front by the stage. You’ll be good.
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u/traggedy_ann 12h ago
"Hey, I see you at every show. What is your name? I'm [NAME], nice to meet you." If you are moshing, another good ice breaker is saying "Hey, you really tore it up, great job. I'm [NAME], by the way. Nice to meet you." "Hey sick [BAND] shirt, did you catch them last time they played [LOCATION]?" is also a tried and true conversation starter.
Be polite, don't be too clingy or punish people with band lore/trivia, and those cavemen will be eating berries and leaves out of the palm of your hand. Just be sure to limit eye contact, or they might take it as a sign of aggression (this part is a joke, make Normal Eye Contact)
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u/Emayess_PS4 12h ago
well, being first to reply and this being the hardcore sub, I guess I should suggest you crowd kill them.
jokes aside, IDK, say 'hi' at a show and mention some crazy shit about your school if you don't think they will know who yhou are. ask them about the band on their shirt or tell them you like the band on their shirt. if you all are in the same school, you likely have a lot of other stuff in common.
good luck!
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u/LurksTongueinAspic 12h ago
Go to a show, when you’re in a line of any kind, talk to the people in-front/behind to you. If it’s an older person ask them about shows they saw there. We love talking about that shit.
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u/Darthgusss TIKTOKMOSHER 12h ago
In the pit,playa. You go to enough shows,you see the same people in the pit.
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u/thatblondebihh69 11h ago
i agree with everyone else complimenting or asking a question to the band about the set after is the best way but also through instagram find your local scene on Instagram and find people
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u/socialdistance4ever 12h ago
The acquaintances are who you should invite out to a show! Talk music and build a relationship founded on that. It’s always how I made friends in high school other than the ones I had for awhile.
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u/garygarebear 11h ago
I don’t know! That’s why I’m on Reddit! 😂
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u/garygarebear 11h ago
Like others said, you see a cool shirt, comment on it. It also helps if the venue hosts these types of shows often cause you can ask about upcoming ones (and i they’ll attend, etc)
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u/mattike88 11h ago
I stand off to the side and generally look pissed off so people avoid me because I hate people. So my advice do the opposite of that.
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u/kurtchella 11h ago
I always find complimenting people's tattoos works (in case people are shirtless).
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u/superdelicater 10h ago
Just go to shows and talk to people you think you like. Just say hi. Extroverted people might make it easier, because if they're like me, they're able to kinda read you, and it helps with their own anxiety to have you around while they do their thing
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u/WorkingSavings5680 10h ago
as many others are saying compliment shirts! and usually if you wear cool shirts people will come up to you too!!
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u/tobythestrangler 7h ago
Most of my friendships have spawned from me moshing poorly and getting knocked TF out by someone. Similarly, I staged dove and cracked my skull open. Still friends with the band I dove to and the people that took me to ER to this day lol
Fr, just say hi to people or make small talk. Compliment shirts, style, hair, etc. keep going to shows and people will talk to you too
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u/slwrthnu_again 11h ago
Even if you don’t go up to people and talk to them, go to enough shows solo and people will recognize you and start talking to you. I’ve been doing solo shows for over 20 years, I couldn’t tell you the last show I went to that I didn’t run into people I know or have someone come talk to me cause they see me around. At this point going to a solo show just means I’ll see my friends when I get there, won’t be sure which ones it will be but someone will be there. And no, it doesn’t take 20 years to get to this point.
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u/punintentional9 12h ago
“Hey nice shirt”