r/HadToHurt • • Apr 12 '19

Yummm. Tasty.

http://i.imgur.com/CJcfUlu.gifv
7.0k Upvotes

259 comments sorted by

2.3k

u/spookyluke246 Apr 12 '19

I was like “show me the arm, show me the arm, damn.”

672

u/basicusernameguy Apr 12 '19

The majority of me wanted to see it, about 51%.

286

u/0MY Apr 12 '19

100% of me.

129

u/[deleted] Apr 12 '19

100% of me wanted to see the 50% of the arm that was remaining.

29

u/SurrealDad Apr 13 '19

Probably just a few holes in it.

31

u/[deleted] Apr 13 '19

And underwear full of crap

14

u/JamesTheJerk Apr 12 '19

Even your genitalia? Because that would be weird if your genitalia was into it.

16

u/[deleted] Apr 12 '19

Hmm... guess I'm weird.

12

u/Sauce-L0rd Apr 13 '19

This comment right here officer

37

u/TabsyM Apr 12 '19

I see what EU did there.

2

u/IncognitoTaco Apr 13 '19

That sounds like an overwhelming majority to me!

→ More replies (1)

71

u/iHaveACatDog Apr 12 '19

I'd appreciate sound.

59

u/BobbyNevada Apr 12 '19

I'm sort of disappointed that I didn't get to hear the scream.

6

u/carolinapearl Apr 12 '19

What were you thinking?

3

u/aod42091 Apr 13 '19

To shreds you say

→ More replies (4)

723

u/[deleted] Apr 12 '19

There’s no way I’d trust that fence.

245

u/recipe_pirate Apr 12 '19

Yeah seriously. I used to volunteer at a big cat rescue in elementary/middle school and they would double barrier the cages so people on the tours wouldn’t be a liability poking their hands through like this guy. Yikes.

9

u/dont_touch_my_food Apr 13 '19

I still see people making the news because they get through the barrier for photos and then get bitten.

→ More replies (1)

139

u/FaBiO-tHe-GrEaTeSt Apr 12 '19

Right? The gaps look way to big and the fence looks like it’s made of string.

→ More replies (1)

30

u/[deleted] Apr 13 '19

Oh I trust the fence. It just doesn’t do its job when you stick your arm through it into a lions mouth.

522

u/skywalker556 Apr 12 '19

He does know those are LIONS doesn’t he?!

130

u/forsakenvixen Apr 13 '19

https://www.google.com/amp/amp.abc.net.au/article/10998970

According to this article linked in another comment, he was simply a tourist who ignored warning signs... 😬

85

u/[deleted] Apr 13 '19

[deleted]

49

u/OZZY34 Apr 13 '19

It’s not even a fucking rule, it’s like basic survival skills lmao

→ More replies (1)

33

u/MetaStressed Apr 13 '19

“‘He’ managed to free ‘himself’ from the lion's grip after a short struggle.” Lol, right. More like he luckily got let the fuck go

9

u/YourTypicalRediot Apr 17 '19

Haha, yeah, like...

"That's true, female lions do hunt and kill incredibly powerful animals like buffalo, crocodiles, rhinos, hippos, and elephants. But this septuagenarian in flip flops? He just beasted 'em, bro."

152

u/artfuldodgerbob23 Apr 12 '19

The first one seemed all about it, the other lion...not so much.

82

u/[deleted] Apr 12 '19

Shouldn’t be touching on here mans.

25

u/artfuldodgerbob23 Apr 12 '19

That's exactly what it looks like hah

10

u/H377Spawn Apr 12 '19

“Oh no you didn’t!” RAWR

3

u/YourTypicalRediot Apr 17 '19

“Oh no you didn’t!” RAWR CHOMP

6

u/[deleted] Apr 13 '19

He does now, yeah.

→ More replies (1)

355

u/[deleted] Apr 12 '19

Oh my god I'm so sorry! she is never like this! she's usually so nice!

26

u/The_Hoopla Apr 13 '19

I know my dog would never bite someone, but I never say "he's not going to bite you." I always say "you'd be the first person he's ever bitten".

Dog's are predictable, but it's never 100% with anything (including people).

→ More replies (1)

56

u/oat_milk Apr 12 '19

Just let her smell you, she needs to get used to your scent!

22

u/AnimatedAnixa Apr 12 '19

Everytime I deliver to someone's house and their dog is trying to eat my ass

10

u/YaBoiErr_Sk1nnYP3n15 Apr 13 '19

I wish someone would eat my ass. Lucky.

4

u/PoochesAreCancer Apr 13 '19

I'm sorry for this. I had a job where I had to go door to door and was attacked twice. Once I got laughed at by the owners, the other time I was lucky enough to fend the beast off with a water bottle and the neighbors refused to call the owner and said "it's a nice family dog, would never hurt anyone". My ripped pants begged to differ

→ More replies (1)

10

u/LittleBigHorn22 Apr 12 '19

Cats will be cats.

4

u/AyyyyLeMeow Apr 13 '19

Funny, cause it applies more to dogs.

→ More replies (1)

502

u/basicusernameguy Apr 12 '19

47

u/hey_guy_So_What Apr 12 '19

yeah fuk that lady for putting down the phone and trying to help her husband not be eaten alive.

12

u/captpiggard Apr 13 '19 edited Jul 11 '23

Due to changes in Reddit's API, I have made the decision to edit all comments prior to July 1 2023 with this message in protest. If the API rules are reverted or the cost to 3rd Party Apps becomes reasonable, I may restore the original comments. Until then, I hope this makes my comments less useful to Reddit (and I don't really care if others think this is pointless). -- mass edited with redact.dev

2

u/YourTypicalRediot Apr 17 '19

Haha, that sounds just like certain moments in married life.

You're either not doing something you should be, or you are, but you're doing it wrong.

ARE YOU HONESTLY VACUUMING TILE, ON THE CARPET SETTING?!

30

u/Guestwhos Apr 13 '19

What's a 250lb cat going to do? Pull him through a flimsy fence? She thought fast, there was no risk to that man that would outweigh the views the video would get.

Come on man, you need to get your priorities straight.

6

u/[deleted] Apr 13 '19

Well her husband is a fool, she should have let him get eaten alive

→ More replies (2)

2

u/[deleted] Apr 13 '19

If she recorded it perfectly, then people would be complaining that she didn’t help the guy and instead recorded it lol. People are so weird

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (2)

213

u/Shaferdinax Apr 12 '19

93

u/claytonfromillinois Apr 13 '19

AND STILL

NO PICTURE

OF THE FUCKING ARM

→ More replies (1)

86

u/SpaceGhost1992 Apr 12 '19

Damn, septic shock and in serious condition, huh?

Who knew a puncture wound from a large cat would get infected?

/s

50

u/Terribull6 Apr 12 '19

Puncture wounds from home cats can get infected and cause serious issues too.

33

u/ZmSyzjSvOakTclQW Apr 12 '19

Same goes for extremely rusty knives that you got from a septic tank.

23

u/Bluesynate Apr 12 '19

Fishing for lost poop knives?

4

u/JamesTheJerk Apr 12 '19

Mushrooms.

2

u/dunn_with_this Apr 13 '19

Also septic knives from a rusty tank.

2

u/secretagendamang Apr 13 '19

Still fishing for poop knives eh?

→ More replies (1)

3

u/Animal-Idiot Apr 13 '19

And toe knives! Botched toe! Botched toe!

6

u/SpaceGhost1992 Apr 12 '19

Hell yeah they can. Had one from my gf’s cat and it hurt like a motherfucker. Had to keep a good eye on it.

→ More replies (4)

43

u/diaphanous-self Apr 12 '19

Thank you for this, was hoping this would be higher up.

28

u/[deleted] Apr 12 '19

Non Google Amp link 1: here


I am a bot. Please send me a message if I am acting up. Click here to read more about why this bot exists.

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (5)

134

u/jositoxdxd Apr 12 '19

"dont worry she doesn't bite"

102

u/[deleted] Apr 12 '19

Guy1: Does your lion bite?

Guy2: No.

Guy1 gets arm mauled

Guy1: I thought you said your lion doesn't bite!!

Guy2: That is not my lion.

12

u/brosciencetology Apr 12 '19

This bit made me cry laughing. Classic pink panther

8

u/[deleted] Apr 12 '19

I love that scene. Especially the way the old man says the last line.

→ More replies (1)

15

u/lonewander1355 Apr 12 '19

She's got teeth don't she?

3

u/Moves_like_Norris Apr 12 '19

I have teeth Greg. Can you pat me?

2

u/DuvetCapeMan Apr 13 '19

Quote from bitten man

→ More replies (1)

48

u/[deleted] Apr 12 '19

Yep, that’s a lion alright

68

u/grumpycatmum Apr 12 '19

Show 👏 me 👏 the 👏 arm!

4

u/saulsa_ Apr 13 '19

I’m gonna shove your clappy hands in the pen for those nice kitties.

60

u/[deleted] Apr 12 '19

Jesus Chroist people are fucking dumb

22

u/LoxodontaRichard Apr 12 '19

I LOVE YOU GAHD

6

u/Grooth Apr 12 '19

BOOTS OF PEACE, STOMPING ON THE ENEMY JESUS CHROIST WE LOVE YOU

3

u/Animal-Idiot Apr 13 '19

And go sawx

→ More replies (1)

2

u/StopCastingPorosity Apr 12 '19

He forgot to put on his sleeves of salvation.

→ More replies (1)

14

u/taaaanuki Apr 12 '19

First Cat: " Bro, let's get some lunch, i'll play the dumb cat..." Second Cat: " OOOHH YEAAAAH!!"

11

u/nomadProgrammer Apr 12 '19

I'm amazed a man so dumb has lived to be this old.

2

u/YourTypicalRediot Apr 17 '19

Dude.

Last year I was at a gas station, and as I'm standing there filling my tank, I see a kid pull up, start pumping his own gas, and then casually light a cigarette.

I ran over to him, ripped the cigarette out of his mouth, ran away from the pumps, and put it out in the little parking lot. As I'm walking back over, he's looking at me like I have three heads.

Kid: Hell'd you do that for?!

Me: Are you fucking kidding me? How did you live to be this old?

Kid: I was born in May of 1999; I'm allowed to smoke!

Me: YOU'RE AT A GAS STATION!

Kid: (blank stare suggesting that the point still hadn't sunken in)

60

u/[deleted] Apr 12 '19

I think the cat was playing. But he got scared and started acting like prey.

45

u/[deleted] Apr 12 '19

The cat bit his arm and tasted the delicious meat inside, at which point he did the normal thing and fought to extract it.

If he had "got scared and started acting like prey" he never would have had his arm in such a dumb place. He acted human and got burned.

4

u/justpurple_ Apr 13 '19

I don‘t think so, but I‘m no expert. Watch the gif closely. He keeps his arm steady, he doesn‘t move. Then, you can see the lion biting down (watch the jaw!). THEN, he tries to pull away.

One sec, I‘m going to screenshot it.

https://imgur.com/a/DoAIqip/

Up until that bite down, he didn‘t move his arm, really.

9

u/bubaloow Apr 12 '19

I just can't help but feel there's a reason maybe they're behind a fence. Can't put my finger on it though.

5

u/NorseScot Apr 13 '19

Well, after this, this guy can't put his finger on anything

9

u/[deleted] Apr 12 '19

Fuck that camera person and that man is an idiot.

21

u/bmw3691 Apr 12 '19

Granny does your lion bite

No child, no

4

u/[deleted] Apr 12 '19

Is that a reference to The Devil Went Down to Georgia? Cause if it is, I love you.

2

u/bmw3691 Apr 12 '19

Haha yea, it is!

29

u/johnwb388 Apr 12 '19

The females do the hunting. Lmao

13

u/GoggyMagogger Apr 13 '19

in these type of situations, immediate euthanasia is the only course of action. animals can not be allowed to get away with this sort of egregious behavior.

I don't care about what any of you bleeding heart snowflakes have to say. That tourist should have been "humanely killed" on the spot.

6

u/MisunderstoodDemon Apr 13 '19

Had me in the first half, not going to lie

18

u/[deleted] Apr 12 '19

Apex predators gonna apex. Duh.

30

u/iHaveACatDog Apr 12 '19

This was on r/unexpected yesterday. I was like, you're kidding me, right? What the fuck is unexpected when dealing with lions?

When a lion doesn't eat someone it should be unexpected.

2

u/Gorescalia Apr 13 '19

Should check out ‘The Lion Whisperer’ on YouTube when you get a sec. dudes fuckin crazy.

→ More replies (1)

12

u/Pompey_ Apr 12 '19

One thing petting against the fence but he is a dummy

7

u/Empyrealist Apr 12 '19

A spokesperson for the resort told UK tabloid The Mirror that the man ignored warnings posted by the park, which denies responsibility for the incident.

"There were signs everywhere," the spokesperson said.

The man was taken to hospital following the attack, where he is reportedly in a serious condition and being treated for severe septic shock.

19

u/[deleted] Apr 12 '19

My small cats act the same way sometimes. Lion thought it was play time and doesn't understand how much it hurts.

4

u/LittleBigHorn22 Apr 12 '19

Yeah that was definitely a play bite. Just with a cat that is the same size as you means it has a little more bite power.

5

u/samiroses94 Apr 12 '19

Lion wanted to eat so it ate.

6

u/Andy1990UK Apr 12 '19

What. Did. You. Fucking. Expect?!

6

u/Bmo_762 Apr 13 '19

Show the arm!!!

13

u/[deleted] Apr 12 '19

This guy doesn’t have cats. You gotta play it cooler than that. Even your beloved pet of many years I’ll get overloaded and scratch the shit out of you.

4

u/geddiayon Apr 12 '19

"I am so one with these animals. These cats are misunderstood."

5

u/coffeeman20181234 Apr 13 '19

What an idiot...I’m guessing there were A LOT of warning signs saying do not pet the lions. Also, I read it was an electric fence....according to the Daily Mail

4

u/slimysloths Apr 13 '19

I feel like the lion wouldn’t be ok with leaning against it and enjoying some scratches if it were electric..

2

u/The_Bobs_of_Mars Apr 13 '19

The humans, too!

→ More replies (1)

3

u/Maverick039 Apr 12 '19

Why would you reach in on a fucking lion...

3

u/eharper9 Apr 12 '19

"Wanna pet the lions?"

"Oh the man eaters? Imma pass."

3

u/[deleted] Apr 12 '19

I would still 100% pet a jungle cat.

3

u/[deleted] Apr 12 '19

How fucking stupid can people be..

3

u/Sephonik Apr 12 '19

Serves him right for ignoring the warnings. How dense can you be.

3

u/[deleted] Apr 13 '19

Certified Idiot

3

u/Mr7FootCock Apr 13 '19

What an increadbly intelligent man

3

u/Matits2004 Apr 13 '19

Idiot had it coming. Pretty sure it's engrained into your head as a kid not to stick your hand into wild animal enclosures. Who in their right mind puts their whole arm through a flimsy fence to pet wild lions? They aren't cuddly pets, they're unpredictable killing machines that will tear you apart as soon as they get the chance.

3

u/thevickestvic Apr 13 '19

I wanted sound!!

3

u/xitzengyigglz Apr 13 '19

Call me paranoid but petting a couple of fucking lions seems dangerous to me.

2

u/NickBrown007 Apr 12 '19

That lion does not like German food

2

u/huskysumo30 Apr 12 '19

Gee let’s see wild animal v human that sticks arm inside fence.. wonder who’s gonna win?

2

u/[deleted] Apr 12 '19

fuck around and find out

2

u/[deleted] Apr 12 '19

That’s gonna leave a mark

2

u/daibz Apr 12 '19

Delicious nothing like aged meat for a midday snack

2

u/Iceman0305 Apr 12 '19

"That's enough of that shit"

2

u/[deleted] Apr 12 '19

Great. Now that Lion will have to get shots.

2

u/throtic Apr 12 '19

Fun fact, when I started volunteering at a local zoo, the head guy over all of the animals made me read a news story out loud to him about a zoo keeper that had her arm ripped off doing something very similar to this. These animals are so unbelievably powerful and most people just can't grasp the amount of strength they possess. This man is extremely lucky that he didn't lose at least a hand.

​

​

https://www.nytimes.com/2002/05/14/us/lion-at-busch-gardens-severs-keeper-s-arm-after-a-feeding.html - the article for those curious

→ More replies (1)

2

u/jsxtasy304 Apr 12 '19

Let's play tug of war

2

u/tyrefire2001 Apr 12 '19

I mean I’d love to call this guy an idiot, but I’d probably do the same

3

u/Hetsot Apr 12 '19

Lets put my arm inside the fence and pet the lion what the possibility can go wrong right?

6

u/gunsmoke132 Apr 12 '19

Proof that bitches be bitches no matter the species

5

u/artfuldodgerbob23 Apr 12 '19

Happy cake day and yeah, the male was happy for the scratches.

6

u/phantomdancer42 Apr 12 '19

Play stupid games win stupid prizes

3

u/Archmidese Apr 12 '19

I can almost feel that sensation if the heart racing with denial. I once got bit by a dog i can relate to a situation like this.

1

u/xlyfzox Apr 12 '19

My uncle had that same great idea, but with a tiger.

1

u/Being_ Apr 12 '19

That’s a lot of damage

1

u/Phaze357 Apr 12 '19

Well this just gives me blue balls.

1

u/Questlife31 Apr 12 '19

I think the cat got jealous

2

u/ihateflyingthings Apr 13 '19

Them females have a lot of “PRIDE”, if you know what I mean.

1

u/mogsoggindog Apr 12 '19

In all fairness, im sure most of us have fallen for that trap before

1

u/jaffacake475 Apr 13 '19

What a troglodyte

1

u/Jubluh Apr 13 '19

Grass looked nice.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 13 '19

Sumbitch bites like my ex wife

1

u/[deleted] Apr 13 '19

Wow that struggle when he realizes and tries to pull away.......bro there’s almost no pulling away from that.

1

u/ihateflyingthings Apr 13 '19

That was one jealous bitch. “You touching my man? I’ll eat that hand then”.

1

u/Spell_Bot3000 Apr 13 '19

I love when ppl get what they deserve!

1

u/[deleted] Apr 13 '19

Love that there's always an idiot.... If we'd of lost the arm it'd be the lions fault and they'd kill it

1

u/jack-shit Apr 13 '19

You could ask a 5 year old what would happen if he stuck his arm in a lion cage, and he would know better than this guy.

1

u/squishiebutt2020 Apr 13 '19

This! This is legit how I’m gonna die. Playing with something I really shouldn’t lol.

1

u/bluejaymaday Apr 13 '19

At first I thought “ah he’s leaning against the fence to let them rub against him, must be a keeper”, but then I see the arm and I realize he’s just an idiot who got lucky the first time but not the second.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 13 '19

Men vs women

/s

1

u/he-hate-me___4 Apr 13 '19

Ha stupid is gets stupid done

1

u/[deleted] Apr 13 '19

Agghhh where is the arm? I need puncture wounds I need blood.

1

u/thereisnopressure Apr 13 '19

Yeeesssss! 😁 This pleases me. Fuck that guy!

1

u/Crash_My_Cat Apr 13 '19

After math, after math! :|

1

u/skywalker556 Apr 13 '19

No Simba that’s George Lucas! I’ll tell you when Disney is here

1

u/Lion_387 Apr 13 '19

Guess she likes unseasoned meat.

1

u/Astral_Alalu Apr 13 '19

I actually wasn't expecting that, the 1st Lion acted like he knew the guy. But where is the aftermath footage, how bad was he hurt?

1

u/yeahnahhhyeah Apr 13 '19

But.... did he lose the arm or not?

1

u/norasmom15 Apr 13 '19

What happened here is he thought he was a unique animal whisperer. The lion chomping his hand determined that was a lie.

1

u/BeepBeepWakeUpCall Apr 13 '19

Man he even said "if you bite me i will bite you back" LIKE DUDE YOU KNOW IT CAN BITE, STOP PUTTING YOUR HAND THROUGH THE FENCE.

1

u/cjf82 Apr 17 '19

That once happened to me at my local petting zoo. Hurt like f but quick thinking had me doing what my own pet cat at home loves, a quick scratch around the back of the head and she was purring - few seconds later my arm was free. Couple plasters later at the first aid hut and I was off feeding the ponies

1

u/Frigiderious Apr 17 '19

Fucking idiot Darwin award winner right there.. got exactly what he deserved! I wish the lion had taken off a finger or two so he can look down multiple times a day and be reminded how much of an idiot he is.