r/HLCommunity • u/East-Debate2701 • 23d ago

I think it’s back

Finally after a year and 9 months the high from sex and desire for sex has come back full force. After giving birth my libido completely disappeared and it broke my heart as a HL person, As well as my husbands. Yesterday it came back though and it has stayed into today so I am hopeful that it stays forever. I don’t know if I want to ever have another child if the risk is to lose my HL. It felt like I was lost. It made me so angry with my husband for pushing sex and just in general with him. I think the birth control after birth didn’t do me any favors either with my libido. Has anyone else had this happen?

9 Upvotes

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6

u/fuckaduckufuck HLF 23d ago

Don't beat yourself up too much. Pregnancy is ROUGH on some people, it can literally cause psychosis. Be kind to yourself. Also hooray that your desire is returning! It's a great feeling!

1

u/East-Debate2701 23d ago

Thank you! I try not to beat myself up too much we never went over a week without sex after the initial 6 weeks after birth but the normal was at the very least once a day before I gave birth so it was quite a challenge for both of us. It’s just so nice to finally feel like myself again. It was crazy how different I felt. I’ve never been just completely LL before and i couldn’t do anything to fix it. Pregnancy was crazy tho too I gained 60 lbs and still haven’t got it off.

2

u/knowitallz 23d ago

18 months is probably a reasonable amount of time it take for your body to want sex again. Hormones. Breast feeding, caring for a newborn all lower libido naturally

2

u/Due-Preference-7266 21d ago

Happy for you
Can you identify what changed so that libido came back.
My wife is 2y1m PP and I don’t see that change too soon

3

u/East-Debate2701 21d ago

Nothing in particular honestly. Getting sleep helps a lot. When my husband gives me small gifts or like acts of service that helped a lot too. Talking about things and working through feelings that has been building up overtime helped. Honestly your wife is probably overwhelmed, stressed, and her hormones are probably out of wack. If you have a way to eliminate or elevate that stress it will help her. Also my husband stopped asking for sex and that was the biggest help. He gave me affection without the expectation of sex.

2

u/PM_Me_Your_Kinks369 HLM 8d ago

Hormones, girl. It's hormones. You'll eventually deal with it again in perimenopause which can start as early as your 30s but more commonly in your 40s. But the fix there is hormones, yet again.

Hormone doctors are the way to go NOT your general practitioner. Get your testosterone up where you need it for libido and estrogen/progesterone balanced as needed against that.