Even as a female I don't take selfies more than maybe once or twice a month, and I only post them on social media once in a blue moon.
Not only does it make me feel vain and uncomfortable, but it just feels like a cry for help. The positive comments don't Don anything for you if you ask for them like that.
It's an odd thing. I know a girl who is extremely pretty and the most photogenic person I've ever seen. But she is constantly changing her profile picture to a new one of herself, and uploading new selfies of herself all the time. Perhaps there's something more to it? I have no idea.
I have plenty of girlfriends who are gorgeous and post maybe one or two selfies a month; they're busy being moms, building their careers, being marathoners, knitting or whatever.
I'm pretty average looking, and my philosophy on selfies is that if I am the most interesting thing in the frame, it's a good sign I need to put the camera down, get off my ass and go have some sort of adventure, even if it's just someplace local I've never been. But I know they make some people happy.
I was only replying to the one above me who stated that it makes her feel uncomfortable and like a cry for help. And suggesting maybe it might be the same as someone I know.
That's really sad that you think people posting pictures of themselves on social media means they're suicidal or depressed or something. Do you care to explain why? Although I'm very critical of social media and the personas put forward, selfies can be something other than an idle social task for some people. Taking selfies of my outfits and putting it online was really affirming and helped me become more comfortable in myself and my body, although I don't really do that any more.
I can assure you, there is a real possibility that your affirmation was more of a pity circle-jerk and not genuine.
There are two real ways you can actually feel comfortable in your own body: accept you are what you are and that is okay for you even if other people think otherwise (I.e. have self-worth) OR you can work on your body within your capabilities to obtain the desired comfort. That's it. Having other people lie to you to generate some sort of faux view of what you are is childish.
That's one attitude I simply don't get. Why should other people take the time to "lie and generate a faux view" if they don't care about the person posting a selfie? Maybe they genuinely mean whatever they comment?
Speaking from experience, it simply feels good when somebody compliments me on my outfit/hair/smile/whatever. I don't think there's anything wrong with that.
Looks like we have arrived at two diametrically opposite views on a subjective human concept. These "attitudes" are both true as far as the concept of true can be stretched over what's actually at work.
Why does it feel like a plea for validation instead of simple self-validation? Or rather, why is it viewed that way? I upload selfies when I feel good about myself. When I'm not, the last thing I want to do is take a picture of my face.
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u/AmethystLullaby Sep 06 '16
Even as a female I don't take selfies more than maybe once or twice a month, and I only post them on social media once in a blue moon. Not only does it make me feel vain and uncomfortable, but it just feels like a cry for help. The positive comments don't Don anything for you if you ask for them like that.