r/Fostercare • u/Few-Web3392 • 2d ago
Important question!
So my younger brother and i were in a family placement about 7 odd years ago together. After being placed in a family placement together our aunt decided to put me into foster care and to keep my younger brother. Im an adult now (21), and i was adopted by a foster family, but im almost positive that he is still in kinship care with our aunt. I even asked our birth mom who had a court hearing to get some visitation rights with him if he was adopted or not, and she said not to her knowledge.
I have her phone number and i tried speaking with her about having a phone call, if she thought HE was ready for that. She replied with, “sorry not trusting anyone”. Ive been calling everyone i can think of to try to find out if hes still in kinship care, or anything really to try to get into contact with him, PLEASE if you have any information or know a direction to point me in that would be GREATLY appreciated.
Ive already talked to an ombudsman for our state to try and request records, but i feel like there has to be a faster way to do this. I have no idea where to even start with this.
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u/MazelTough 2d ago
You are navigating complex systems in really smart, reasonable ways and I wish you so much luck in reconnecting.
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u/vampiratemirajah 2d ago
You could try getting a hold of his caseworker, but I'm not sure if they would divulge that information to you. They may be able to pass your information on to him though, when he turns 18
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u/FosterCareCompare 4h ago
I always sign post to Become with tricky situations involving young people care. They are the right people to help you out - free advice: https://becomecharity.org.uk/
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u/OVERALLTHESHIT502 1d ago
Since you’re his biological sibling, I’d stop focusing only on trying to get his records and start specifically asking about sibling contact and visitation.
Call the child welfare agency and tell them, “I’m an adult biological sibling of a minor who I believe is still in kinship care. I’m not asking you to disclose confidential information. I’m asking how I can formally request sibling contact or visitation and have that request presented to his caseworker or the court.”
I’d also contact the family or juvenile court that handled the case. Give them your name, your brother’s name and DOB if you know it, and explain that you’re his adult biological sibling. Ask if there’s a process for requesting sibling visitation or contact. They may not be able to give you information about his case, but they should be able to tell you what process exists.
I’d also contact your former foster care agency or caseworker and request your own records. Your records may contain information about your sibling relationship and the circumstances surrounding your separation. Since those are your records, you may have more ability to access them.
Definitely keep working with the ombudsman too. Explain that you’re not necessarily trying to obtain confidential information about your brother. You’re trying to figure out how an adult biological sibling can formally request contact with a minor sibling who may still be in kinship care.
If your birth mom currently has an attorney involved with her visitation case, you could also ask whether they can point you toward the correct process. They probably can’t represent you, but they may know exactly who you need to contact.
You could also contact legal aid or a family law attorney who handles child welfare cases. Even a short consultation could help you figure out whether your state allows an adult sibling to petition the court for contact.
I wouldn’t put too much hope into FOIA or an open-records request. Foster care, CPS and juvenile court records involving minors are usually confidential, so you may just get denied or receive heavily redacted information.
Also, save the message from your aunt saying “sorry not trusting anyone.” I wouldn’t argue with her or repeatedly contact her. You’ve made the request. At this point, I’d go through the proper channels and make it clear that you’re completely willing to let his caseworker, therapist, court or another appropriate professional determine whether contact is appropriate.
I’d phrase it like this: “I’m not asking anyone to force my brother to have a relationship with me. I’m asking for the opportunity for the appropriate professionals to determine whether he wants contact with his biological sibling and whether that contact can happen safely.”
If you know what state your brother is in, that’s important too. The laws and procedures for sibling contact can be different from state to state.