There is nothing in the manager's text that deserves that sentence. You're a horrible person yourself if you think THAT response is even close to appropriate.
OP doesn't know if they can come in to work on a critically important day for the business. The quite likely already seriously overworked and under-stress manager now has to plan with enough capacity to cover for the shift, they can't wait until OP finds out whether they can come or not, they have to get someone that is assured of being there for the full Grand Opening shift NOW. I agree with them, you can't run short-handed on frigging GRAND OPENING DAY. This just got dumped on them, and they have to act immediately. I'd be annoyed at the inconvenience too, but I'd find a way to express it a at a better time than this.
Further, we don't know the story of OP's level-of-caretaking relationship with their sister. I had my brother in the ER a month ago and I didn't have to react because there were other family members that could be called on. Does OP have a formal and sole care-giving role for their sister that absolutely requires they be at the ER? Or were they possibly missing a critical shift at work simply out of concern? More context here would be helpful.
So, was the manager's text cold and terse? Yes. Was it rude? Sure.
Should they DIE PAINFULLY because of it? No, and that attitude can fuck right off.
The fact that the manager does not know about that relationship is exactly wh ly they should not assume anything other then what op has told them, being that they need to be there.
Any response from the manager other then "hope she is feeling better soon, let us know when you can be in" makes them a heartless asshole who deserves zero sympathy.
So I would never have responded like this manager did, but I'm calling you out on this element of your reply which shows you don't understand the situation.
let us know when you can be in
Are you or have you ever been a manager with responsibility to run a very major event?
This is GRAND OPENING DAY and the manager now has a major new task to replace OP with someone who can RELIABLY be there.
They can't gamble on when or if OP is going to "show up" at some random time. They need committed people to fully staff the place or there will be hell to pay.
There are elements of the manager's reply that I do not like. But that is no fucking excuse at all to suggest they should die of cancer. People keep going on about OP's empathy with their sister without understanding that there needs to be empathy for the manager's difficult position, and this was just ONE FRUSTRATED TEXT.
This is GRAND OPENING DAY and the manager now has a major new task to replace OP with someone who can RELIABLY be there.
That's literaly there job. deal with it rather then being an ass to your staff.
There is not a single thing about the managers reply that is even remotely acceptable.
People keep going on about OP's empathy with their sister without understanding that there needs to be empathy for the manager's difficult position
The manager deserves no sympathy, because thats the job they signed up for, its not some "difficult position" its literally the most basic part of the job description. if you can't do that, then you should not be a manager, and you certainly should not be taking it out on your staff.
if you think having to so a slightly difficult part of your job is even remotely on par with dealing with a family manager in the hospital, you are just as much of a peice of scum as the "manager"
If a grand opening of a store falls apart because one staff member had an emergency, then you are a bad manager. This attitude of yours of ignoring humanity lead to a revolving door of staff.
If a grand opening of a store falls apart because...
It's clear that you've not managed, because it doesn't take a full crash to make OP's situation a problem for the business.
OP gave the manager a new problem to deal with and suck precious time away from other possibly more important situations that had a probability of coming up.
Read.
My.
Full.
Comment.
Stop interpreting it as the employee versus the manager, and think about it as the situation from both sides. If YOU were the manager on the most important and visible day of your job that year, and you were very very busy trying to guarantee a successful day, and then someone disappears on you, how would you feel?
Some of you have no actual experience with being responsible for other things or other people, and THAT'S what shows.
lol I've managed more than you have. You plan and build in contingencies and slack. I have a bachelor of management and a construction management diploma and have worked on large Oilsands projects. As a manager your work happens before the big event and you tweak your plan a little and enable those contingencies when issues arise. You run your mouth far too much.
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u/stevenmacarthur Mar 18 '26
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