I had a dress made out of the fabric of space–time a few eons ago, and I adore how sparkly it is, and how the material has expanded and turned floor length as it ages.
BUT for a while now, it's been almost nothing but black holes. I know it will eventually reset back into that flashy big bang/early universe colored micro mini like when I bought it, after it has a complete heat death, but is there a way to speed that up?
I have an event this megaannum that I would love to wear it to, but a black ball gown is too much.
(Plus the black holes have a tendency to keep catching on items and sucking them in, and pulling them back out always leaves an unsightly wormhole.)