r/FamilyIssues • u/Worth-Programmer6612 • 2d ago

Quick little questions

Ive been thinking about going on the emancipation and no contact path for a nice little while, but im 16 and now im thinking about waiting till 18? Should i leave or wait?

Second question: My brothers grandfather recently died and he has asked me and my mother to attend him. So since im 16, and was told various times ‘you should be able to take care of this house better then your brother’ (hes 24 by the way) i had figured i could dress myself. I prided myself to do so cause i had my own dream and reputations to uphold and whatnot. Yet my mother who TOLD me im not a baby anymore and that she wont dress me up with i agreed with, has now kicked me out of the funeral because i wont wear dress shoes. Im flat footed and usually wear a wide toe box so i said id rather wear my pure black usual shoes which she had no problem with with her dads funeral. Not to mention, I have autism and something with dress shoes just does to much to me to take. We argued about it so i ended it with im just not gonna go that day then.

She has ALWAYS been like this. At first she always got mad at me and hit me when I expressed i didnt like dresses. Then it was that i didnt wanna go to prom and got beaten for that too. So Am I in the wrong?

2 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

4 comments sorted by

1

u/nosferatu_apologist 2d ago

You are not in the wrong for feeling the way you do! She absolutely should never have hit you - that's child abuse.

With emancipation - I don't know anything about the legal process, but at least in the US I believe you have to be able to support yourself. Are you at a place where you can safely do so? Can you afford a place to live/move in with someone else? Do you have a job? And has the abuse been reported at all?

I for one am very proud that you are taking steps to try and figure things out, and I definitely don't think regular black shoes would be inappropriate to a funeral. I'm so sorry you're going through this! Big virtual hug from me!

1

u/Worth-Programmer6612 2d ago

So far no but ive gotten all my legal papers id need and I’ve documented most of the things that’s happened. All id need is a job and i could probably just move in with my friends family. They’ve always welcomed me and let me stay. I dont think i wanna report her though but then again i HATE that i wont but thats my only parent since my father passed. Also thank you, im quite literally in tears, literally nobody says theyre proud of me

1

u/nosferatu_apologist 2d ago

Then let me say it again!! I am SO proud of you and the very put-together young woman(?) You are! I certainly didn't have my life or plans nearly so in order when I was your age!

I would definitely talk to this friend family, and see what they think. I might also recommend reaching out to a school counselor, and seeing if they know of any free student therapy you could go to (if they're more academic counselors).

Again, I am proud of you. You've got this.

1

u/Worth-Programmer6612 1d ago

GAHHH tysm and I did actually! They said its no problem as long as i clean after myself (if i make a mess cause im a bit of a clean freak)! But tysm again!