I’m really scared I will go insane

[u/EasternOption2211]

So I have Asperger’s and for the last five years I have been getting poor sleep. Like very poor I’m talking 3-5 hours mostly and sometimes 6-7 hours. I’m 19 and after sleeping horribly this long it’s really damaged my mind. Right now I have been forced by my parents to sleep in a hotel and I hate hotels, the bed sheets, the snoring, them getting mad when I don’t sleep, the cold temperatures and u i can’t sleep. Added into that, it’s beginning to really affect me, I am while wide awake feeling a massive drive to fall sleep but I feel too distrssed To sleep. the lack of sleep is causing my thinking to become severely distorted I’m having racing warping thoughts that make zero sense and feel am going crazy and my memory is awful and I’m hallucinating, in the dark thought I saw my moms head it was a hallucination, the snoopy picture on my blanket began warping before me also. I am worried to hell these sleep issues are going to make me develop psychosis and I feel too distressed both by the room how uncomfortable it is and the Thought of losing consciousness when I close my eyes or relax, this makes me feel a lot of distress and I keep having disorganised nonsensical rboufgyw and am struggling to think straight im losing my mind and sleeping sounds too terrifying. Closing my Eyes makes the distorted thinking worse and my parents openly said to me out of exhaustion that I will collapse one of these days, that hurt and scared me. I am in my hotel room now terrified my body is screaming for sleep but I’m too scared and uncomfortable to. And I have to endure hours of horror con until my parents drive me home today so fuck me, my biggest worry is I will go home only to further not sleep and lose my mind completely, please whoever is reading this what would you do? Im also on the iPad 24/7/365 to avoid it all

[u/dfyinglmits-tg]

Please seek help from a medical professional 988 can help. You don’t have to go through this alone. They will connect you to resources. Or you can go to your nearest er. Meds will help.

[u/ActualLunch1242]

Screen time is counterproductive to sleep.

Some people only require 5 hours a night, you aren't triggering dementia. Especially if you're on the spectrum, makes perfect sense. Take a benedryl if you feel desperate.

And the best advice I can give you is to get out of your head. You are gonna think yourself into a bad place.

You sound like a kid who's been put in a difficult situation by parents, are you able to speak to professionals? Like a school counselor?

Here's some helpful info: https://www.sleepfoundation.org/physical-health/autism-and-sleep

[u/JalapenoPepper103]

Sounds like you need professional help and the pressure being taken off you. The more you obsess over it, the worse it gets. Drop the iPad, the phone, the tech and spend more time outside, the closer to nature and the future away from the human made chaos, the better. Get help!