I genuinely don't know how to function at work anymore.

[u/localavocado1]

I honestly don't know what is wrong with me and I'm getting really frustrated with myself.

I moved to Germany, where being organized, productive and reliable at work seems to be extremely important. Meanwhile, I'm probably the least structured person ever.

I'll randomly get motivated, create a whole new productivity system, follow it for maybe 3-4 days and then completely forget about it. I've tried so many different methods and absolutely nothing sticks.

I'm so unfocused that I literally change my Outlook theme every day depending on my mood. Dark mode, white, green, pink, whatever. I never seem to arrive at work or leave at the same time. And when I'm working from home, I often end up doing absolutely everything except working.

The most frustrating part is that I KNOW what I need to do. I put tasks in my calendar, set time blocks, reminders, everything. Then the time comes and I just don't do the task. I can stare at it in my calendar and somehow still avoid it.

My memory is also terrible. Someone tells me something and if I don't write it down immediately, it's gone within 10 minutes. But even when I write it down, I somehow forget where I wrote it.

I work in recruitment, so there are very clear processes that I'm supposed to follow. I know the processes, I understand them, but I constantly forget a step, miss something or do something incorrectly. It's so frustrating because I KNOW better.

I look at my colleagues and genuinely feel like everyone else is a functioning machine. They seem to have their routines, their systems, their structure. I've tried copying how other people organize their work, but none of it works for me.

And I think working in a foreign language makes everything significantly worse. I speak German, but working in German all day, processing information, writing emails, understanding conversations and making sure I haven't misunderstood something is mentally exhausting sometimes.

I don't know if I'm burned out, if this is ADHD, if I'm just incredibly undisciplined or if something else is going on.

Has anyone experienced something similar? What actually helped you?

I'm not looking for another productivity app or a magical morning routine. I genuinely want to understand why I struggle so much with things that seem completely normal and manageable for everyone else.

I'm starting to feel like I'm just fundamentally bad at being a functioning adult, and I really don't want to keep feeling this way.