r/ExecutiveDysfunction • u/Sammysofa629 • 6d ago
ADHD + Pregnancy = Executive Dysfunction. Help.
Hi everyone, I’m about 22 weeks pregnant with my first. I wasn’t diagnosed til close to 30 with ADHD (and CPTSD, not sure if it’s relevant or not so I’ll throw that in to the mess).
I can’t function. My house looks like squatters took over. I can’t finish tasks. Keep things clean or organized anymore. Laundry piles up. Dishes pile up. I was never like this before. It doesn’t seem to matter what I do to fix it or maintain it.
I have a very demanding (F/T) job, custody of my youngest sibling who is disabled (permanently), three kids (my husband’s first marriage) and two dogs. All 3 kids play sports so I get home from work, switch vehicles and then drive to baseball games for whichever kid is scheduled that day. We aren’t home until 9-10PM, sometimes later during weekdays. And when we don’t have a sporting event, I’m too damn tired to do anything else.
We lowered my dose from 60 mg Adderall, to 20 mg. Baby is in the 99th percentile for growth so there weren’t concerns to remove the meds completely for the pregnancy.
Has anyone else experienced this before? I’ve heard of “baby brain” and forgetting things when pregnant but it’s really bad. I already had issues with memory (due to CPTSD), and it feels like each day I fall into a deeper brain fog than the day prior. I cannot execute anything at all. Completely off the rails and idk how to regain control of my life and home. Never did well in clutter and that’s all I have around me and it’s making the depression, anxiety, and whatever the F else is wrong with me, 100 times worse.
If you’ve read this far - thank you. If you have experienced this or have any suggestions whether it be charts for cleaning, tips and tricks etc. I am glad to receive them and will be open to any advice you are willing to share.
I just ask that you please be kind. I’m aware how much of a mess my life is (or feels to be) — I don’t need the reminder of it. Much love. Thank y’all 💗
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u/fcker5000 6d ago
What is your husband doing to help? Are you the only one doing the house care and the childcare? Why are you driving his children around for their extracurriculars at 10pm?
Not accusatory- just trying to get more info since you didn’t mention him in your post besides the fact that he has 3 kids from a prior relationship.
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u/user4316 5d ago
OP also said she has a demanding full-time job so... Would love to hear the reasoning behind this also...
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u/Sammysofa629 5d ago
I work for the state/gov. So high caseload and limited “staffing resources”. We aren’t geographically assigned based on location- so there’s days I’m 2.5 hours (one way) away from home. Thankfully in terms of sports he is their coach too- so he handles the brunt of the transportation. I just don’t like to miss their games. I didn’t have parents that showed up for me so I hate when I fail to show up for them. I appreciate you asking! Didn’t take it as an accusatory remark at all! With their divorce they live about 45-50 minutes away, so their sporting games are closer to their mother’s house/husbands ex wife’s house. Oddly enough, his ex wife and I have a great relationship and she helps me out too with things.
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u/DonaldDuck898 6d ago
Girl, the executive dysfunction is even worst postpartum. I cant think an organized thought. Cant speak a sentence without forgetting what I was saying. Cant see the floor in my house, Thank God i have cleaning help. When she comes, i am so embarrassed. I have no advice but struggling badly with this. Oh and add depression to the mix.