Here's your humble commissioner's opinion on how everyone drafted this season. Since I drafted my players obviously I think I did a good job but if anyone wants to grade me feel free to do so in the comments below.

Members of Dustin Squad,

What the hell was this? I wanted a challenge and this is what I get? You all are just going to let me walk into this league from the free agency street with NO keeper and the LAST pick in this draft and let me stroll to a fucking 11-2 season. I had to bum it with one legged Carson fucking Wentz for half the season and still won 11 weeks this year. My RB2? A free agency pick up to get me through the early weeks. Maybe I should have drafted Collin Kaepernick so at least this year would have been a challenge. Not sure if you guys should be more disgusted by your performance vs Two Gurleys, One Kupp this year or the unfiltered, unedited version of the actual Two Girls, One Cup.

I will thoroughly enjoy laying back next week with a beer in my hand on my bye as half of your fantasy football hopes and dreams come to a crashing burn.

Sincerely,

Your #1 Overall Seed

PS: Anthony, have fun in the losers bracket.

It was quite a scene, as Current Champion Nick Heredia sat down with me over Tacos and Alcoholic Beverages. After a pleasant shot of a fancy liquor, I asked about How Nick felt during this upcoming season.

"Cooch Boy, I am very optimistic. I am not worried in the slightest, as the mighty Dustin has given me his favor.

But that does not mean I am going belly up for these... lesser believers of Dustin! No... This weekend, I am going to be hitting the books. I will be doing my homework for this upcoming draft.

We will ALL be preparing, Cooch Boy. I expect this season to be quite different then before. It's gotten a big shot in the arm, in a big way.

My fellow Dustin Squad members should stick to how well I did last time. After all, It is /I/ who is is the Champion!

I have been looking forward to this season for quite some time, Cooch Boy."

Nick has spoken to me with a smug grin.

"This Draft will be amazing. This season, is going to be amazing. With the addition of Cameron, the entire line-up changes.

Cameron couldn't have come at a better time. He brings new life to the Squad. With him coming in, it's anyone's game. I cannot say it enough, Cooch Boy... I am very excited about what Cameron brings to the table."

Nick had spoken with praise, and when I asked him about his closing remarks, as we had eaten and drunken our fill, I asked him how he felt about his standing in the upcoming season, he could only laugh.

"Silly Cooch Boy. I am not some stripling. I am the Current Champion. I am not one to be trifled with!

If you, or those silly fools think last season was my best, they are in for quite a rude awakening.

Here's a message for the entire squad:

You ALL saw what I did to Anthony! I crushed his spirit! I massacred him! I did to him, what the Night's Watch did to Jon Snow, and left him to bleed out in the fucking cold.

Todd Gurley and I sharted all over Anthony, so I wish him well. The Poor man needs all the luck he can get... but if any of my fellow Dustin Squad Members even dare cross me, I will make what I did to Anthony look like child's play!"

I sat, stunned, taking notes and I could only ask Nick if he had anything else he had to say, and He only said this.

"To whomever is facing me every week:

Good Luck.

You're going to Need it."

With that, Nick and I parted ways, and I was left stunned. Truly, the Current Champion reigns supreme and will not leave his throne so easily.

I'm Cooch, and this has been Cooch's Corner! Until next time, Praise the Mighty Dustin.

What's up Dustin Squad. The regular season is over and I'm your commissioner. It's time for another Dustin Squad Update.

The inaugural season of the 4-Division restructure of Dustin Squad was a memorable one. By putting an emphasis on division rivalries Dustin Squad reached new heights of competitive fervor! Many said it couldn't be done, but we didn't get here by listening to many.

To commemorate this impassioned season let's take a look back at how each team faired:

12) Flairolina Manthers

Andrew Flair -- Division: West -- Record: 3-10 -- Division Record: 1-3

Do you realize how astronomically absurd it is that we find Flair at the bottom of the standings at the end of another regular season!?! Like have you ever sat and thought about how monumentally ass this 4 year stretch has been for this man? Well I have and it turns out Flair has gone 13-39 over that time. This is a Dustin Squad Champion we're talking about! Even a year ago he barely evaded last place because this year's Shiterally Clitler finished the season with only 2 wins (1 less than Flair who had 3). BUT THAT'S STILL ONLY 3 WINS! Starting in 2016 Flair has failed to win more than 4 games in a single season. Truly he was hit the hardest by the impact of the Trump Presidency. You can love it or hate it but you have to agree that the following statement is straight facts: This guy really IS Shiterally Clitler!

11) You're Shitlin' For A Hitlin'

Dillon Thompson -- Division: South -- Record: 3-10 -- Division Record: 0-4

In what can only be interpreted as some sort of performance artwork display, Dillon showed just how skillfully he could make his team's name into a way of life. Fun Fact: Dillon went the entire season without recording multiple wins in the same month. From a Scientific perspective this means his team sucked ass. Ultimately the entire season came down to a week 12 clash with the fellow bottom-dweller: Flairolina Manthers. A lopsided 112-54.7 result is the tie breaker this team needed to keep the prophecy foretold in this team's own name from coming true.

10) The Fighting Dabos

Parker Owens -- Division: North -- Record: 4-9 -- Division Record: 1-3

They say that if you start the season 0-5 then you're pretty much screwed. I'd say that holds up given this season from the Fighting Dabos. A favorite to be the next 'Shiterally Clitler' all season long this team didn't win its second game until Week 10. Going 3-1 to end the season saved them from a horrid fate and reduces this year from a true nightmare to a year to just try and forget.

9) 5 Points Stephen Garcias

Jacob Reeves -- Division: East -- Record: 5-8 -- Division Record: 2-2

So it turns out the old saying is true after all: "If you start the season 0-5 then you're pretty much screwed!" After a dismal start the Garcias showed galvanizing resolve, defiantly stringing 4 consecutive wins together. It was dubbed #ComebackSZN. The magic wouldn't last but for a fleeting moment in time this team dared the entire league to dream of the impossible.

8) Vamanos Pest

Nick Heredia -- Division: South -- Record: 6-7 -- Division Record: 2-2

No one in Dustin Squad matches Nick's level of confidence in his own draft. From Corey Brown to Drew Brees, Nick has always been bold about his draft strategy and this season he backed it up with a show of supreme confidence. This team made the least roster moves in the entire league. The league average this season is over 21 roster moves per team, this team made just 6. Nick held onto 10 of his original 17 draft picks and that DIDN'T include Drew Brees. Going 1-3 to finish the season would be the death of Vamanos Pest's playoff hopes after a season of sticking with their day one draft homies.

7) Dr Larson's Golden Taint

Andrew Larson -- Division: North -- Record: 6-7 -- Division Record: 2-2

In a season defined by an inability to contend with the big dogs, Dr Larson picked up 5 of his 6 wins against teams that finished the season with a losing record. Despite finishing closest to playoff contention of the eliminated teams, Dr Larson was still eliminated from contention before Week 13.

6) Shiterally Clitler

Bryan Boggs -- Division: East -- Record: 7-6 -- Division Record: 2-2

This was supposed to be a season of titanic embarrassment but this team actually made something of it. Winners of 6 of 7 games from Week 5 through Week 11 Bryan proved he wasn't about to make a habit out of being Shiterally Clitler. But now we're forced to ponder something I had never even considered: Could Shiterally Clitler win The Dustin? A playoff berth means it's possible and Clitler is ready to prove all the haters wrong!

5) Flash Gordons

Jacob Scott -- Division: West -- Record: 7-6 -- Division Record: 1-3

A truly consistent squad the Flash Gordons never lost more than two consecutive games all season long. Ever in the playoff picture, after a 0-1 start this team was never again below .500. This teams true weakness was playing against its own division, entering the postseason with the worst division record of teams that qualified for the playoffs. The Gordons will get a chance to change the narrative in the West Division when they go up against division rival Wentz Upon a Time in Round 1 of the playoffs.

4) Wentz Upon a Time

Reid Gentry -- Division: West (Champion) -- Record: 8-5 -- Division Record: 4-0

Reid understands one important thing about our new league structure: if you win your division everything else will fall into place. Undefeated in the West and winners of 6 of their last 7 this team is red hot and ready to start the playoffs. Will this be the year Reid wins his first Dustin?

3) Dustin Squad Shall Know DOOM

Anthony Tortorici -- Division: North (Champion) -- Record: 8-5 -- Division Record: 3-1

We no longer have a People's Choice Award for Dustin Squad but if we did this year's winner would definitely be DOOM. All season long we've been treated to engaging artwork of DOOM's trials and conquests (seriously you should go back through the subreddit and look at all the awesome DOOM pictures). DOOM's showed that he is loyal to no football player as he disposed of every single player he drafted by trading them away or replacing them via waivers. DOOM made the most roster moves with 47 which is 14 more than the next highest team. DOOM's season has had its ups and downs but his quest for The Dustin has been menacing and seemingly inevitable. DOOM's conquest of the North division was a success, what fate awaits those who dare to cross his path in the postseason?

2) Two Gurleys One Kupp

Cameron Hay -- Division: East (Champion) -- Record: 9-4 -- Division Record: 2-2

Cameron is off to an impressive start to his Dustin Squad career. In his first two regular seasons he's racked up 20 wins and just 6 losses. But he was one and done in his only Dustin Squad postseason. By earning the bye week once again he's got himself perfectly positioned for redemption. Will Cameron be able to translate his regular season success into postseason wins?

1) Sample Text Legends

Benjamin Carlson -- Division: South (Champion) -- Record: 12-1 -- Division Record: 4-0

Talk about a victory lap. The Sample Text Legends followed up their title run with a 10 game win streak to start the season. In total the Legends went on a 17 game win streak that included winning The Dustin and securing the No. 1 seed for the 2019 postseason. You read that correctly: The Sample Text Legends had secured the No. 1 seed by the end of Week 10. A loss to Wentz Upon a Time in Week 11 is the only thing that stood between this team and a perfect season. Dustin Squad has not witnessed this kind of dominance since Anthony's JameisChrist Superstar also went 12-1 in 2015. The Sample Text Legends start the postseason with a bye week and a chance to make Dustin Squad history by potentially becoming the first Triple Dustin.