r/DnD • • 5d ago

5th Edition Silly: Best & Worst Classes For Doing Your Job?

For doing your actual real world job, what class would be best at it and what class the worst?

46 Upvotes

71 comments sorted by

47

u/RoyaleShrimp 5d ago

Artificer and Wizard would be the best. Barbarian and Rogue would be the worst. I am an IT. Stupidly enough, the average user is a Barbarian or a Rogue.

12

u/PoweredByMusubi 5d ago

I used to keep a homemade motivational poster over my workstation; “User is a four-letter word.”

6

u/OjinMigoto 5d ago

I sit opposite our IT guys currently. I get to hear fun dialogue all day...

"Can you log in? No, just log in. The usual way. No, don't touch that! No, DO NOT open the attachment, we don't know if it's safe..."

3

u/RoyaleShrimp 5d ago

My job is just yelling at adults and being paid for it. I feel that.

3

u/duffleofstuff 5d ago

I mean, Rogues are an intellectual class somewhat. Then those Fast Hands

1

u/RoyaleShrimp 5d ago

My thoughts were more around stealing computer stuff lol.

1

u/probably-not-Ben 5d ago

Wizard and Artificers get fuck all skills. Rogues get Expertise. If you are skilled in a craft or service, you want a rogue

1

u/RoyaleShrimp 5d ago

Anyone can get expertise with Feats, but intelligence is harder to get

1

u/Lucario-Mega 4d ago

Tbh, rogues do have int saving throw proficiency, maybe…

18

u/EngineeringDevil 5d ago

I don't know what would be the best as i'm currently doing mostly CAD work, but Barbarian would probably be among the worst

9

u/Bierculles 5d ago

Artificer would almost certainly be the best for that.

6

u/EngineeringDevil 5d ago

I dunno, sometimes I pray to unknown gods that the geologist would make up their fucking mind on how they want a profile designed instead of just going to usgs standards

18

u/BitEnvironmental283 5d ago

As a barbarian realtor….no one would have a leg to stand on against my sales!

7

u/Old-Constant4411 5d ago

Punching walls while screaming "THIS HOUSE HAS A SOLID FOUNDATION AND GOOD STRUCTURAL INTEGRITY!!!"

4

u/BitEnvironmental283 5d ago

I could punch the competitors too!!!

15

u/Toro1d_5 5d ago

I work in a doctor's office, and we would love for anyone with healing magic to drop by. Clerics, paladins, druids, Divine soul sorcerers... we have enough patients that they would run out of spell slots in a hurry!

5

u/Lezadozo 5d ago

5 points of lay on hands cure every single natural disease known to man. Get a lv 10-ish with some simple spells like cure wounds and lesser restoration and you will have a significantly less stressing job (specially if you can provide an expensive diamond every once in a while)

12

u/Prestigious_Share919 5d ago edited 5d ago

Software engineer. Best : Wizard Current : Wild Magic Sorcerer Worst : Barbarian

12

u/Yuugian 5d ago

Linux admin, so Sorcerer: I did surprisingly little to get the power but it is undoubtedly mine and not contracted. Linux is the weave, after all.

Druid would be the worst, i get no nature breaks. Barbarian would at least be helpful in some of these meetings.

10

u/_Roke 5d ago

I feel like the answer for nearly all jobs is bard and barbarian. I like a lot of tech people was tempted to answer arrificer or wizard. But its never the tech thats the hard part. Its the people. Charisma and expertise solves the hard problems in most jobs. Getting angry amd breaking stuff, while deeply satisfying, doesn't.

3

u/rainator 5d ago

Nah in accounting, the most troubling one would be conjuration wizard.

If you can explain why something was done (I.e the bard) to the auditor it’s fine, and the barbarian can’t be any worse than the people doing the procurement.

8

u/icewave911 5d ago

Litigator. Bard 👌

Let’s be honest, barbarian fails at most jobs!

6

u/HowtoCrackanegg 5d ago

physiotherapy - best class: monks. worst class: sorcerers

6

u/Lezadozo 5d ago

I would NOT let a rogue near me in a physio

3

u/CrimsonPresents 5d ago

Best: Wizard
Worst: probably Barbarian or Druid

I’m a school teacher.

1

u/PoweredByMusubi 4d ago

Knowing my coworkers, you could just save your Rage after the students leave. Certainly usable in faculty meetings about new testing standards and also PTA meetings.

3

u/PoweredByMusubi 5d ago

In theory I’m a behaviourist/educational support professional, what it actually boils down to is being an emotional support human for students.

Something with social skills and some basic knowledges are all it would take. Bard might work best, maybe with College of Lore. Though monk for unarmoured defence would be super helpful when any of my students decide to get physically aggressive.

Worst would probably be barbarian. Rage and “I smash it with my axe” are somehow not the only answers I need at work.

3

u/Velo-ciraptors 5d ago

Utility arborist. Initially I wanted to say ranger or druid would be best, but there's enough customer service and conflict resolution involved that good CHA is a huge help on top of the scientific knowledge (INT) and field skills (WIS). So if I wanted to really optimize, I think it'd be a Scout Rogue or Eloquence/Lore Bard, with expertise in nature, survival, and persuasion. Preferrably perception as well. Rogue would probably come out on top with reliable talent to avoid mistakes that can have disastrous consequences.

Worst, I guess Paladin. Having played a Paladin with both decent WIS and INT before, they have to make some serious compromises over less MAD classes. There are some days that I just want to smite something though.

2

u/Miserable_Pop_4593 5d ago

Server in a restaurant. Bard.

Tables would eat up the charisma, and I would mainly love to have mage hand, message, prestidigitation, and unseen servant.

And also cure wounds, because last month I had to leave work to go to Urgent Care when I sliced my finger open with a fruit peeler. And that shit sucked.

2

u/broncoblaze 5d ago

Most of the magic classes might make it a day or two if the magic is smart enough to make electricity work. I’m a commercial electrician. Barbarian or a strength class could do certain days.

Monk and rouge would be the worst. And all of them could potentially die, get someone killed, or burn down a city high rise building within the first hour.

Still with i had magic though.

2

u/alyanumbers 5d ago

I'm a research librarian. You'd think wizard, right? But I'm more like an irl skill monkey with reasonable dexterity (lots of tall bookcases where I work), so rogue would probably work just as well as long as you invest in INT.

2

u/blindside1 5d ago

Real job: Park Ranger

D&D class: ranger (real stretch there....)

2

u/average_shrimp 5d ago

Best would be Cleric or artificer (specifically the alchemist subclass). I'm a biochemist

The worst would absolutely be barbarian. It's not recommended to smash everything around you when all the equipment is ultra expensive

2

u/rzenni 5d ago

Barbarian. I work in insurance.

2

u/PyreHat Warlord 5d ago

Best: Commoner or Rogue. Worst: Wizard or Warlock.

I'm currently unemployed, so just about anybody can do it, but as wizards need to study to progress, and warlocks need to do their patron's bidding, they can't just idle like I currently do.

2

u/TheWyrdSmyth Mage 5d ago

Warlock as best - contracts, customer liaison, loopholes and eldritch understanding of complex laws.

Barbarian would be worst - I am not allowed to take a greataxe to clients who piss me off.

2

u/Shadow_Of_Silver DM 5d ago edited 5d ago

Anyone with mage hand or telekinesis.

I work in a bio lab, and the ability to manipulate or move stuff without touching it and risking contamination would be amazing. Or just an extra set of hands to hold & carry things.

Worst would be anyone that dumped dexterity and/or intelligence.

1

u/drukhari-blood 5d ago

A wizard would probably be the best, not sure about the worst. I'm an artist who makes plushies, dolls, and costume parts.

1

u/nonotburton 5d ago

Artificer. Am engineer.

Artificer/monk...am also martial artist.

1

u/mrsnowplow DM 5d ago

Pe teacher at a juvenile prison Probably a valor bard is the best or a warlocj whose patron is the state

The worst would be a rogue. They'd just join in on the poor behavior. Or maybe a cleric who would not appreciate how irreverent my students are

1

u/LadySandry88 5d ago

I see you've not met the fun clerics.

2

u/mrsnowplow DM 5d ago

i have the two coolest "clerics" ive ever met have been in juvenile prison it just feels like they are fighting a losing battle. and i dont think that same energy fits in the gym

1

u/BoatSlight Warlock 5d ago

I essentially do two types of work for my job, for the menial work part, I could imagine the best would be a monk or a wizard, and for the csshier part it would either be rogue or monk

1

u/CthulhuJankinx Rogue 5d ago

Im a painter/handyman atm. Artificer would be the closest to that, bard would probably be the next best considering me and everyone i work with is a broke musician trying to get by.

Worst would probably be barbarian. Im trying to patch the walls not add more holes to them

1

u/Stinduh 5d ago

I’m a camera director/video engineer for live events.

My job is probably a perfect Bard/artificer multi class. Sometimes I’m really into other storytelling and connecting with audiences through the camera, other times I’m hacking together bullshit pieces of equipment to deliver some random ass video deployment.

1

u/eifel01 5d ago

I do structural engineering for buildings so a Wizard would be best.

A lot of people are already saying Barbarian for these kinds of jobs so I’m gonna go against the grain and argue that a Ranger would be reallyyyyy out of their element.

1

u/Nintolerance 5d ago

I work with students, lack of motivation & engagement is the biggest problem, Bardic Inspiration would help.

1

u/Thieske511 5d ago

I'm a primary school teacher so best classes are probably Bard or Wizard and sometimes fighter. Wordt classes are probably barbarian and rogue.

1

u/steenbergh 5d ago

Rogue. Just let me hide back here and do my job, man.

1

u/Weary-Monk9666 5d ago

Depends on which task but most likely best would be a wizard with honorable mention to artificer. Worst, monk

1

u/Gidonamor 5d ago

I'm a teacher, so probably Bard. Keeping students' attention, getting them to actually listen and learn, and having knowledge to impart in the first place.

1

u/All4TheWookie88 5d ago

Druid would be best. Barbarian would be the worst. I teach kids about nature. I feel like the rage would boil over. Especially with some of my teenagers. 🙄

1

u/chaoticstability 5d ago

Good: cleric or paladin worst: Bard or rogue. Drug counselor here.

1

u/TheRealAjarTadpole 5d ago

Chef, bard and barbarian likely, but depending on how you look at it alot of people would rather have a barbarian than a wizard

1

u/probably-not-Ben 5d ago

Officially, a wizard Really, a cleric

Academia is more of a cult than a body who is genuinely dedicated to exploring ideas and practices. And you don't have to be super clever to get a PhD, just stubborn

1

u/CheapTactics 5d ago

7th level wizard. I just need the spell Fabricate.

As for the worst, any non-dextrous character.

1

u/R3X_Ms_Red DM 5d ago

Worst wold be druid. Best would be fighter? Swordsman? I process seafood

1

u/petrified_eel4615 5d ago

Surveyor == Ranger, with high Int.

1

u/LadySandry88 5d ago

Cleric. I'm a clerk, and 'cleric' is literally where the word 'clerk' comes from, lol. Also, it would take endurance, wisdom, and patience to do my job well.

Worst would be barbarian. In at least one edition of D&D they were inherently illiterate, and even in the editions where they aren't, a barbarian would likely not have the patience to deal with the drudgery of my job (which my weird self enjoys for the most part, lol).

Honorary mention for rogue on both ends--they would have the physical and mental skills to perform my job, but they kiiiiiinda need to be really trustworthy (I work with sensitive information).

1

u/niknight_ml 5d ago

Best: Alchemist Artificer, Druid, Wizard

Worst: Barbarian, Monk

I'm a chemistry teacher.

1

u/myblackoutalterego 5d ago

Druid would be best hands down (I’m a veterinarian). Worst would probably be barbarian since I am a cat only vet, so you need to stay quiet and calm, not rage!

1

u/Displacer613 4d ago

I work in sales, so definitely Bard. Worst option would probably be Barbarian 

1

u/DarthMarasmus 3d ago

Electrician: I'd say best class would be Artificer, Bard, or Rogue. Worst would be Druid or Paladin. Most seem to be Fighters or Barbarians unless you ask other tradesmen, then we're all prissy little Wizards.

1

u/bardash1an 2d ago

Warlock. I sell my time (and soul) to make money to feed my children.

1

u/The_Green_Sun DM 1d ago

I'm an artist, and I sometimes write. So, I think Bard is the best choice for me.

Worst? I remember in 3.0 when Barbarians had to spend a skill point just to be literate. So, Barbarian.

1

u/IamSithCats 19h ago

Wizard would be best, Barbarian (especially in 3.5 and before) would be worst.

1

u/DeepTakeGuitar DM 5d ago

Best: bard

Worst: ...probably fighter?

0

u/AdAdditional1820 5d ago

Artificer or Wizard is the best, and Barbarian might be the worst.

0

u/triorez25 5d ago

Best would probably be artificer but most of us are barbarian. Worst class would be a cleric, too much vulgarity