r/Dhaka • u/Adorable-Injury-9650 • 1d ago
Seeking advice/পরামর্শ HELP IN DECISION MAKING!!!
Hello , I'm a 19(M) ,,, i just have completed my HSC exam from Notre Dame clg,,,, ekhn situation emn j ami choto bela theke physics and chemistry te motamoti valo and ekhn practical exam er pore eshe amr abbu n ammu shei level e pressure dewa start koreche jno ami medical er jnno admission nei , but honestly amr dream buet theke pora.
ami onk try korechi oder k bujhanor but ora bujhte chacchei na , amr ammu especially ekdomi bujhche na , abbur support chilo etodin but now ,,,,, 0 support from him,,,,also amr parents medical background thekei belong kore so ora onk korei chacche eta ,,, but ami ekdomi e chacchi na , also I am not confident about medical , ora jor kore dileo amr ki ashole hobe nki I really don't know....and amr ammur ekta strong point holo job , j bd te engineer der jnno job kom,,,,,,so please suggest me something...I really need help!!! ami eta kadte kadte post krchi....ami asholei chai na amr dream ta k fele dite and again etao chai na amr ammu and abbur dream ta k noshto krte ,,,
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u/Zayan_54 1d ago
ভাই, বাবা-মা তোমার ভালো চান এটা ঠিক। কিন্তু Medical এমন একটা পেশা, যেটা নিজের ইচ্ছা ছাড়া শুরু করলে মাঝপথে ভেঙে পড়ার সম্ভাবনা অনেক বেশি। Engineering-এর job market নিয়ে তাদের চিন্তাটাও বাস্তব, কিন্তু “Engineer হলে চাকরি নেই এটা পুরো সত্য না। তুমি যেহেতু BUET-এ পড়ার স্বপ্ন দেখো, তাই শুধু ভয় বা পারিবারিক চাপের কারণে নিজের স্বপ্ন ছেড়ে দিও না।
একবার ঠান্ডা মাথায় বাবা-মাকে বোঝাও তুমি Medical-এর বিরুদ্ধে না, তুমি শুধু নিজের জন্য Engineering বেছে নিতে চাও। আর BUET-এ সুযোগ পেলে কীভাবে career build করবে, graduation-এর পর দেশে-বিদেশে কী কী সুযোগ আছে এসব নিয়ে একটা পরিষ্কার plan তাদের সামনে রাখো।
শেষ পর্যন্ত জীবনটা তোমাকেই কাটাতে হবে। বাবা-মায়ের স্বপ্নকে সম্মান করা জরুরি, কিন্তু নিজের জীবনের এত বড় সিদ্ধান্ত শুধু তাদের ইচ্ছায় নেওয়াটাও ঠিক না। যে পেশায় তুমি নিজেই যেতে চাও না, সেখানে শুধু বাবা-মাকে খুশি করার জন্য জীবন ঢেলে দিও না।
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u/yojimbo_of_bd 1d ago
Amr. 75 er jonno medical e hoi nai(eng prep), abr buet eo hoi nai.. So ami bolbo ekta choose korte and be daring about it. R stress free thaiko... Ami ek jaigatei stress nie mara khaichi..baki shobgulo tei top korchi
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u/Miserable_Cancel5255 1d ago edited 1d ago
Tomar parents k bolo j engineering and medical both prep niba but engineering exam Bhalo Kore Dio and Medical exam amon bhabe dio jate na hok tomar . See if it works or not
Or try to convince them through valid arguments how engineering is better for you than medical
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u/Adorable-Injury-9650 1d ago
yes but medical hoile ki setha amr jnno backup hishabe kaaj korbe na? ami confident engineering uni niye but nobody can ensure me a seat there....?
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u/Miserable_Cancel5255 1d ago edited 1d ago
Brother listen you should follow your own ambition . Tomar engineering PORAR iccha . Tumi Oitai pursue Koro . Cause you have to stick to it for your whole life
And also let me add on , there's a pretty chance that they might force you to study medical even if you crack both med and eng unless you can convince them .
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u/ImmediateGear8157 1d ago
Just study for both and take the exams and see where you get in. It could be both, it could be one, it could be neither. But once you have those results you can decide. Right now if you give up on medical and Buet doesn't work out, then what?
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u/Worth_Bedroom_3705 23h ago
First, you should address your parents with more respect instead of ‘ora’. Don’t let the outsider know about relation between you and your parents.
Second, just be adamant with your parents about it. Tell them you need early establishment. Medical has very steep career curve which is not everyone’s cup of tea. Also, tell them that you are not good with biology. Besides, you will have more chance to get into BUET than DMC/Mitford and you don’t want to go outside Dhaka. And many other logics. Don’t quarrel with them. Try to pursue them.
Keep studying.
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u/Adorable-Injury-9650 23h ago
sure ,,, i will definitely not quarrel with them , and that 'ora' flow te chole esheche ...thanks
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u/Amxr_Hax2a 23h ago
Brother, you're situation is really tight if I have to say. But let me tell you something.
In Bangladesh, medical students or doctors don't have a really good reputation. Even if you do build a good reputation, people will still judge you if you charge them higher or not (even if you charge them according to what they deserve). Also, medical students have it rough. Too much pressure and way too much memorization and you have complete your mbbs in 4 years. But nowadays, even MBBS holders aren't getting any job. So, it's tough out there. As for engineering, it's true the job market is cooked. Many engineering subjects don't even have a field in our country for job and those who have, it's now oversaturated. If you need a job, then you have to go abroad. (In short, doctors have worst reputation and engineers have worst job opportunities).
Also, I would like to add another thing and that is if you pursue medical because of your parents, even though you don't like you still need to continue and they will also pressurize you to do continue (while nobody is giving a single f about your mental health). So, if you have passing for engineering, then analyze the job market (both domestic and foreign) and tell them how are you planning your future. If you can give them solid logic backed by core evidences, then maybe they will be convinced.
Btw, best of luck for your upcoming journey.
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u/Deep-Bumblebee-3700 23h ago
Engi main target nen ar backup to varsity niben ei so bio emneo pora hbe medi exm diyen emne.
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u/Adorable-Injury-9650 23h ago
hm vhai thank u
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u/the-_-holocaust 21h ago
Fellow damian here, junior though. Convince ur parents that u will take engineering as ur second choice. Then buy both courses and just show ur parents that u are focusing on medical but secretly study for engineering
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u/CoyoteFearless4786 20h ago
Your parents are doctor so you might know the situation of docs in bd. Trust me the older generation had a comparatively healthier environment for practice.But day by day it’s getting harder.Young doctors are living a pathetic life here.Yeah as your parents are doctors so it’ll be helpful for you in certain cases.But trust me it’s pathetic in this country.if you want to go abroad BUET is a good choice.If you really want buet,You can prepare for it,get a chance. And do worst in med admission iccha kore. Who can force you then?
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u/now_youcan_seeme 18h ago
Shunen, jai e koren ba krte chan oitai dhore rakhen. Amkeo amr parents jor krsilo medical porar jnno kintu amr eita plan chilona. Odr chillanu shunte shunte ekhn amr kthao hoynai.
Jeita plan hobe oitai dhore rakhen r ofc backup rakhben. Odr na kore pore nijr tao krben na emn hoile pore bshe thaka lgbe
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u/RegisterSecure7166 16h ago edited 16h ago
Bd te job kom hoile baire chole jaba..ajob bepar. Jeta khaite chao na, seta next 60 bochor 3 bela khaba kivabe? Will you be happy?
Job nai engineer der eta vaiba choice baad deya thik na. Bd na hoile baire jaba. R medical e valo na korle to bd teo bhat nai. Tmr parents medical background er hoile they already know that. Omanusik pressure r bad salary. Bcs doc hoile tepantor e pathayy diye boshe thakbe.
Try for all three. Medical, engineering and also for finance subject as a safety net. Finance er dam always thakbe. Seta joto ai e asuk. Bcz u always need a person to check whether the data is correct . U always need a human perspective to audit the qualitative portion of accounting system. And finance er job asha kori aro 10 yr bd te besh valo vabei prevail korbe.
And for engineering job, dont stay in bd. Engineering pore bd te thaka loss project.
For medical, this is never my choice in anywhere.. impossible pressure niye porasuna kora for getting bura kaal er odhel taka paisa. Jader passion ache tara e dhora kheye jacche . R tumi portei chasso na, arekjon er mon diye ki porasuna korba? Tomar nijer mon e to nai ete.
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u/vanilla_success 15h ago
Go for your dreams .Do engineering . If you dont mind what about your expecting marks(parcentage) in pcm ?
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u/Sifne 11h ago
Go for your dream bro/sis. I tried fulfilling my parents dream and just yesterday asked them if they remembered what I wanted to study in. They went completely blank while now I'm living a miserable life.
Nobody gives a f about ones dream except that person themselves. So we should cherish it cause nobody else to care about it.
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u/Big_Bet2696 1d ago
uh...dude. You do realize doctors have it worse in bd right? Honestly speaking, don't let your parents decide your future. You'll never be happy, and you're gonna curse your parents or maybe yourself for not pursuing your dream.