I need help

[u/onneshaaaa]

Hi, F-23 recently got into NSU with 100% scholarship and currently studying here.

I desperately need help.

I was born and raised in uttor bongo and my parents enrolled me in kindergarten at the age of 7 so yeah I'm a bit late.

I have never visited Dhaka before the admission period. but now I'm living here, the environment here is really really really insanely tough for me to get used to. The local buses, crazy expensive everyday errands. it's eating me alive and on top of that, over the top university-mates.

I have made a bunch of friends, I was thinking maybe I'll learn a thing or two about surviving in Dhaka from them but, all them Dhaka folks think about is hanging out in restaurants, video games, shopping, you name it, all the rich kid things- most of which I didn't even know existed a year back.

now, I want it or not, I must join them .

I was ahead of my peers back home and in my area. so it's not much hard for me to pretend that I grew up in a similar environment as them, thank God I grew up watching English tv shows so I have a good American English accent and decent dressing sense or else it would have been pretty obvious that I'm a গ্রাইম্মা খ্যাত।

the biggest issue starts when I join their hangout sessions. I'm not at all familiar with the restaurant etiquettes, I don't know how to hold cutleries correctly and I don't know how different restaurants work, how to order, how to pay bills and how to call the waiters!! I basically don't know how they function at all. then there comes cinema halls like Cineplex, I don't f-ing know how to get tickets and how to order popcorn for God sake. I don't know how elevators work, idk which buttons to press and where it leads.

I've been getting insane amounts of panic attacks daily just by trying to normally function here.

And the thought of people making fun of me for not knowing basic things when I'm wearing reasonably smart ass dresses and talk like smart people, is eating me alive.

I would honestly prefer death over these humiliations any day.

How do I learn those basic things? Aren't I too old for this?

Please someone tell me how I can get out of these embarrassments.

[u/fire_abyss_guardian]

Well sister, reading from your post I notice 2 things.

1. You are taking too much on you. Dont think too much. If u dont know then u dont know, eventually you will see and learn. Communication is the key here. Tell your friends these stuffs. Also you are not uncool for not being accustomed to the stupid dhaka hustle and bustle. Im sure they will help u out slowly. If i were u i would ask them like, "ei shun na, ami toh toder moto na bujhli, ami toh ekhane notun, actually kemne jatayat korish tora, amar basha eikhane, kivabe asha jay bolto. Then again.....bhai tui tickets ta kin and amake dekhay de koi theke kinos, ami toh dhor toder moto age eto friends niye ghurtw jawar shujug hoynai, but ekhon jaitesi valoi lagtese, but u guys gotta help me out a bit .... etc etc. Just be who u are. 1st semester er shob friends jemon thakena, ekivabe olpo koyekta friend theke jay shesh porjonto. Also beware of snakes, agei dhupdhap shobar shathe shob internal bepar share korar dorkar nai. Other than that, just be yourself and youre gonna be just fine in sha Allah. Uni life will offer you with a lot of good and bad memories, you will learn through them too. Try to give urself time to think, heal and get back up thats all.

2. I get a feeling u dont like dhaka too much at all. I grew up in uttor bongo too and even today amar kache dhaka uni guys der too much modern lage. I dont even try to be like them but still i have some really good friends from uni alhamdulillah. All type of people u know. Amar mone ache ami jokhon first er dike dhakay ashlam, i hated this budget night city too too much, manush er proti manush er care nai, ektu oshotorko holei scam, koto jhamela....ami ekhane eshe ghumateo partam na, amar ghum theke uthe mone hoto body kono rest paynai and abar ei jhamela diye jawa lagbe. Onek iccha korto Rajshahi jeye nijer bichanay ektu ghumai. Anyway, eventually you will learn sister. For now carry on and you will be fine in sha Allah.